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[–]AllTheSmallWings 2980 points2981 points  (98 children)

Some one in Hawaii just confessed their love and now they have to live with it.

[–]chicken_N_ROFLs 565 points566 points  (37 children)

I read in the earlier thread that a guy’s gf called from Hawaii and confessed she’d cheated on him and wanted to get if off her chest before she died. Soo there’s that too.

[–]AllTheSmallWings 177 points178 points  (9 children)

Yikes

[–]Shameless_Ero_Hero 183 points184 points  (1 child)

Good for the guy so he can choose the next move.

[–]thecrazysloth 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Let's hope the guy wasn't Kim Jong Un

[–]Endeavour_198X 906 points907 points  (23 children)

That makes me happy in a way.

If the person they were spilling their heart out to felt the same way, there's probably a new happy couple in the world.

If the person hearing all this didn't feel the same way, the one speaking learned where they honestly stood.

[–]Snamdrog 406 points407 points  (9 children)

Someone in the original front page thread said their crush told them they've got feelings for them and after the false alarm notice went out they got coffee. So there's that.

[–]LecheQuemada 30 points31 points  (8 children)

I will have to search for that

[–]chunwookie 224 points225 points  (9 children)

Plot twist, it was their best friend's wife.

[–]selotipkusut 139 points140 points  (1 child)

If it went well, he'd be over the moon.

If it didn't, he'd probably chose the missile impact death.

[–]VeryCanadian 40 points41 points  (3 children)

There's a post on /r/news saying their crush admitted she had a crush on him.

So that's nice.

[–]Trussed_Up 5661 points5662 points  (318 children)

I would be really curious to know how many times you have to mess up in order to "accidentally" hit the nuke message button.

[–]TheRagingRavioli 3822 points3823 points  (73 children)

Even my browser asks me are you sure you wanna close it with multiple tabs open. You're telling me theres a literal button someone accidentally pressed with their ass?

[–]Damon_Bolden 1608 points1609 points  (54 children)

"Hey Johnson, you hit the yellow button right?"

"Oh shit, yellow, I thought you said red"

"Might want to clean up that CV"

[–]TheRagingRavioli 770 points771 points  (47 children)

"Yeah, lemme just finish this episode first"

38 minutes later...

[–]SmellGibson69 338 points339 points  (40 children)

I just saw a video of a father putting his daughters into the sewer to save them from the apocalypse. Fuck that guy that took 38 minutes to give the all clear.

Edit. Sorry. I should have given a link.

Thanks u/boingshi

https://gfycat.com/unsungdamageddwarfrabbit

[–]RCkamikaze 134 points135 points  (16 children)

I assume its more of an hey lets make quadruple sure its not a real thing first.

[–]SmellGibson69 61 points62 points  (15 children)

The news said it was an accidental button push during a shift change. Don’t know if that’s accurate.

https://www.cbsnews.com/news/hawaii-missile-alert-today-emergency-management-system-incoming-ballistic-missile-warning-error/

According to Miyagi, the error happened during a shift change and at 8:07 a.m., "the wrong button was pushed" during the internal drill.

[–]Fantasticxbox 31 points32 points  (2 children)

Can the same guy that press the button cancel it ?

It could be possible that somebody else (or another place) has to check first if everything is alright no ?

[–]SmellGibson69 114 points115 points  (1 child)

The initial button is instant. The cancel button is on a 38 minute delay.

Source : none. I made it up.

[–]FlandersNed 177 points178 points  (2 children)

"East? I thought you said Weast!"

[–]CobraPony67 65 points66 points  (9 children)

The big question is why not retract the message within minutes after it was sent? I can't believe none of the people there did not have a cell phone that immediately showed the message like everyone else and they would have known right away that it was a mistake. Instead over 30 minutes without another message. Smells fishy.

[–]410_Bacon 33 points34 points  (6 children)

I saw someone in another thread say it's probably because they really want to make sure there isn't actually an attack before sending the "all clear" message.

[–]4lwaysnever 846 points847 points  (195 children)

Frankly, I don't think it was an accident.

[–]RidersGuide 411 points412 points  (168 children)

Im curious to this line if thinking. Wouldn't a shit load of other countries have noticed something like that? Satellite imaging? Im not being sarcastic.

[–]reallybigleg 539 points540 points  (94 children)

It does feel like there's something odd about the situation - and I'm usually the one tutting at conspiracy theorists - but I don't know what the true cause is. I doubt it's that there was actually a missile.

I'm having difficulty believing that one can send out this message to everyone with the slip of a finger. They've said that the system needs to be checked regularly (on hand over to the next shift worker, I think they said?), so presumably if it's set up to be checked regularly, there are failsafes to stop someone causing mass hysteria by accidentally "pressing the wrong button" during those checks - there must be a few "wrong buttons" to press before you do something like this, which makes the whole idea it was an accident suspect.

Secondly, the first thing you do if you "press the wrong button" is yell "OHSHITIPRESSEDTHEFUCKINGBUTTONOHFUCKOHFUCK" and then whatever system has been set up to reassure everyone of false alarms - and there must be one - is initiated to tell everyone they are safe as soon as possible. Not 30 minutes later.

I mean, I guess there's a chance that there is indeed a total lack of failsafes and there is no procedure set up for false alarms, or that procedure actually takes half an hour - by which time mass panic could already have caused injuries or death - in which case, the Hawaii's authorities are just fucking incompetent - but I'm going to assume they're not that incompetent and someone has thought of these things.

I don't think there was actually a missile, but I do think there's something a bit odd about the story. If I had to speculate, I'd say dickhead/crazy employee did it on purpose (but then...surely a good failsafe is not to leave this in the hands of ONE person - I would think there is something to stop that); hacking/manipulation; or if I go with flight of fancy, then a deliberate move to increase readiness among the US population (all of whom, I'm guessing, just checked what they should actually do in the event of an attack), because the authorities fear a real attack coming.

[–]wallis-simpson 207 points208 points  (11 children)

If we're gonna get conspiracyie - I heard they used to do this during WW2 to keep the population prepared. You can bet people looked into where a safe place was today.

[–]WAslap 28 points29 points  (3 children)

They taught people to fear the reds. This didn't happen in WW2 for nukes. They tested air raid warning systems for conventional bombs though. Ever hear of the two years the NYC ball didn't drop? Fear of bombing caused it.

However, we must realize that accidents can happen. Anyone in NORAD could've fucked up. Anyone of our nuclear subs in the 70s could've started WW3. Lucky it didn't. Expected if they did.

[–]LordSutter 128 points129 points  (27 children)

I was imagining that someone there thought that they were running a test. The accident was that it went live. Cue freak out then some time to make the appropriate follow up message.

[–]Kai2709 2838 points2839 points  (41 children)

My family is in Hawaii, I freaked the fuck out. It took way too long for them to clarify that it was a mistake. They didn't get the retraction for 25 min after the initial error.

[–]Tinybluemoon 763 points764 points  (24 children)

I was furiously refreshing Twitter waiting for some sort of confirmation. That was a long 5 minutes

[–]Glip-Glops 472 points473 points  (21 children)

twitter is actually the best place to go. You'll a faster update that anywhere else. I also check twitter after an earthquake to see the magnitude and epicenter. Always comes up within 5 min on the event.

[–]kinokomushroom 186 points187 points  (9 children)

I live in Japan and when I feel the ground shake, I usually go to Twitter too because my friends will be tweeting "was that an earthquake?" almost as it happened.

[–]franciseight 927 points928 points  (28 children)

Turned out to be a frisbee that started world war three.

[–]Captain4Loko 9717 points9718 points  (1239 children)

I’m in Hawaii. I woke up to an alarm on my phone saying there was an incoming ballistic missile and that it wasn’t a drill. My sister was crying and my grandma called and told me to pray. My family had no idea what to do so we closed our windows and sat in a car in our garage because it has the only concrete walls in our house.

No warning sirens went off in my area. The news stations weren’t saying anything, mostly playing old sports broadcasts or music. We were waiting for updates or any information about it but didn’t hear anything. We waited about half an hour expecting the island to get hit at any moment until I read a tweet that said it was a false alarm.

We don’t have many known fallout shelters and hardly anybody has basements in Hawaii. Apart from the basic instructions you can find on the internet, what should we do next time?

[–]Han55512 2184 points2185 points  (151 children)

Find out if there is a designated fallout shelter in your area.

Have several days of water stored, and as at least a few weeks of nonperishable goods (you can use a filled water heater and bath tub to store water for boiling)

Have a Bug Out Bag

Most importantly, have a plan.

[–]Arkansan13 207 points208 points  (1 child)

A caveat to this is that a fallout shelter is not always a blast shelter as well.

Also my understanding is that very few if any civic fallout shelters are maintained.

[–]Rocky87109 73 points74 points  (3 children)

I guarantee you everyone is already buying up all the water in Hawaii atm. I was stationed there for 3.5 years and that's basically what happened when there was an inbound "hurricane".

[–]Partykongen 422 points423 points  (92 children)

And particlefilter gasmasks of sufficient quality to allow you to breathe without getting as much nuclear contaminated dust into your lungs.

[–]mindfulmu 229 points230 points  (67 children)

Most survialists will shy away from gasmasks as the amount of money needed to sustain it and replace filters is a bit much. I've done research into it and i cant make heads or tails of how much I'd need to sink into a mask.

I do have a well built bug out bag.

[–]Vaughn 205 points206 points  (46 children)

It's a worthwhile purchase if you think there's a genuine risk of being nuked, as it'll significantly increase your chances of survival. Radioactive dust can be scrubbed off, but if you get it in your lungs, you're just about screwed -- a lot of radiation won't even penetrate your skin, getting it on the inside is always worse.

But it's expensive, yes. The filters don't last forever even if you don't use them, and they get used up fast if you do.

If I were living on Hawaii right now, I might nevertheless consider it. Only do so after making what preparations you can for surviving everyone else being nuked, though.

[–]caverts 24 points25 points  (1 child)

To be clear, boiling doesn't remove radioactive contaminants. You need to distill the water, which means boil it and collect the steam that rises from the boiling water into a second, clean container. Another option is to buy a reverse osmosis system.

I'd suggest stockpiling more like 10 days of water. (1 adult consumes around 1 gallon/day)

[–]TheGhostofSwitzer 190 points191 points  (42 children)

Find a basement if you can because the missile might not be accurate enough to hit the main island directly.

N Korea has low yield nuclear weapons. These aren't the ones America and the Sovs threatened to destroy the world with.

[–]Excelephant 477 points478 points  (24 children)

Looking for basements in Hawaii is like looking for blonde Japanese chicks in Latvia.

[–]ElleRisalo 355 points356 points  (6 children)

Drive to the nearest school and hide under a desk, if it was good enough in the 60s its good enough now.

[–]SuperSeagull01 2513 points2514 points  (821 children)

You can't really do anything against a nuke, can you? They're quite literally going to vaporize everything around you, and the fallout is going to be absolutely terrible as well.

edit: vaporize not pulverize

[–]bob_2048 255 points256 points  (18 children)

I was in the Hiroshima museum a while ago. You can do a lot.

Obviously if you're very close to the nuke and can't go underground, you're pretty much fucked: most buildings will be leveled, your face will melt, you'll be wandering around blind and bleeding from everywhere until you die in the following minutes, hours, or days, like the people in Hiroshima. But otherwise, e.g. if you're not immediately underneath the nuke but still in a somewhat close range, there are important things to keep in mind:

  • The flash: obviously don't look at it. This lasts only a few seconds. But the intensity is such that it will burn anything exposed. Not much is needed to protect you - even just clothing or a newspaper can help tremendously. In the museum they had pictures of a woman whose kimono pattern was etched on her skin: the black pattern had absorbed the light and given her 3rd degree burns. The rest of her skin was fine.
  • The shockwave (1) - a wall of air. Depending on how close you are, this will tear apart anything not made of concrete, and then some concrete things too. But if you're further away, even a car might be good protection. You want to stay inside and away from glass windows, because glass turns into high-velocity shrapnel. Underground is of course best.
  • The shockwave (2) - a little while after you get the first shockwave going outwards relative to the bomb, there's a second shockwave going in the opposite direction, back towards the bomb. So basically, stay put after the first one, don't celebrate your survival yet.
  • Radiation: during the blast itself radiation is a negligible danger. However in the aftermath it is a concern. Fires and wind will carry radioactive particles around. For a little while (a few days) there will be radioactive particles in the air. Basically, stay indoors, don't breathe in the smoke or drink from the rain; mostly common sense stuff.

[–]SpaceShipRat 84 points85 points  (9 children)

what's the official word on shutting yourself in a fridge?

[–]Captain4Loko 2097 points2098 points  (572 children)

Damn maybe I should actually try get closer to the blast so my death is painless

[–]WoefulEnema 237 points238 points  (13 children)

Or just wait it out and hope to become a ghoul.

[–]FarawayFairways 266 points267 points  (28 children)

Damn maybe I should actually try get closer to the blast so my death is painless

It might sound silly, but there were plenty of people in the cold war who had taken that decision (or claimed they would). Even if you survive the blast, you're faced with a breakdown of the food chain, water supply, and medical support system. Your prospects of surviving a nuclear winter without warmth weren't good and quite a few folk had reconciled themselves to an instant vaporisation rather than a slow and painful death from exposure to radiation

Your suggestion isn't so surprising or sarcastic as you might think

[–]lshiva 112 points113 points  (15 children)

I grew up during the Cold War, and I knew I didn't need to worry about how to survive after a nuclear attack because I lived very near a major military base. I knew all the basic theory, but I never made any actual plans.

[–]FarawayFairways 67 points68 points  (12 children)

I do remember having a chat about it, and there was a sort of family decision taken to stand underneath the damn thing which I wasn't so keen on doing. Eventually I persuaded parents that it wasn't their job to take that decision for me and that my instinct was to try and survive and this is how we left it

As I've got older though, I think I've become more resigned to the futility of trying to survive it and would prefer to go out in the first devastating hit.

Since we're the biggest aircraft carrier America has, we were always going to be hit very heavily and without the land mass to retreat into, we'd be wasteland within the first hour

[–]Arkansan13 45 points46 points  (4 children)

Survival is quite possible depending on your distance from an initial blast. Particularly given that the trend in the past few decades has been away from large yield weapons of the cold war and toward smaller yield more precise weapons.

[–]Daeder 545 points546 points  (17 children)

My brother lives in Hawaii and told me that he woke up to the notification on his phone and went back to sleep. If he was gonna die, he was going to die peacefully in his sleep.

[–]LoveMeSexyJesus 488 points489 points  (8 children)

That's one of the dumbest, most-inspiring tales of lethargy I have ever heard.

Edit: grammar

[–]breadshoediaries 89 points90 points  (0 children)

Lol I love this. I'd be calling loved ones but I can understand his sentiment too.

[–]Darktidemage 324 points325 points  (99 children)

No, that's not how it works at all.

You are talking about if the nuke hits directly on top of your house.

What if the nuke hits 5 miles away?

How about 10?

How about 15?

The vast majority of the impacted people will be in these exponentially larger circles around the zone you are describing.

[–]darkslide3000 244 points245 points  (77 children)

Exactly. Duck and Cover is not as stupid as most people believe. When you see an alert like this (and it's real), find the best shelter you can (e.g. a deep cellar or whatever). It may easily make the difference between life and death when the nuke 3 miles away from you knocks your walls down.

[–]automated_reckoning 164 points165 points  (69 children)

It took me forever to understand why people thought duck and cover was stupid. I mean, it's what you do in earthquakes, pretty much. If there's a good chance of debris and the building falling, get under something sturdy.

It's obviously not going to protect you at ground zero, but you're probably not gonna BE at ground zero.

[–]BillyBetty 43 points44 points  (0 children)

They're quite literally going to vaporize everything around you

Nope. Hawaii is bigger than you think, as is Oahu. If a 100 kt nuclear weapon detonated over Honolulu and you're living in Kailua that is a good ten miles so you might be fine as long as winds are going NE.

If it's over the airport and you're in Waikiki you're maybe 5 miles so taking cover might be the difference between flash burns or not. Lots of factors go into it but bottom line there is no rule saying a nuclear weapon within 10/20/50/whatever miles means everyone is going to die.

[–]MagicSPA 196 points197 points  (13 children)

You can't really do anything against a nuke, can you?

You can do things that will improve your chances. A 40-something Japanese man, Eizo Nomura, was within several hundred yards of the Hiroshima bomb and lived because he was in the right place at the right time (a subterranean reinforced structure, a bank if I recall correctly). He went on to live into his 80's, in fact.

They're quite literally going to vaporize everything around you, and the fallout is going to be absolutely terrible as well.

Nukes only "vaporise everything" within a limited radius of the explosion, most of the damage is caused by the blast, and people can survive a blast strong enough to demolish a house. People hear the word "nukes" and think of some almost magically, almost mythologically powerful and destructive weapon against which there is no hope. The reality is that while they are very energetic, they obey the same laws of energy dissipation as any other explosive. Put as much distance between yourself and the likely detonation site, put as much material between yourself and the likely detonation site, and stay separated for as long as possible, and your chances of surviving will increase markedly.

Fallout's a bitch, but the same scenario applies - avoid where it's likely to go, and put as much material as you can between you, and do that for as long as you can, and you'll do your chances of survival wonders.

[–]RW_Highwater 32 points33 points  (4 children)

A lot of people don't understand half life, so radioactive fallout seems totally mysterious. It's horrible. But much of it dissipates in a few days.

[–]NICKisICE 74 points75 points  (15 children)

The "vaporize everything" zone of a nuke is smaller than most people think. Hiroshima still had a handful of concrete buildings standing, though the wooden structures were all vaporized.

That being said, it completely depends on the nuke, and if it is detonated on impact or a thousand feet up (much worse). There are some existing in the world today that are a fair bit more powerful than what we dropped on Japan.

[–]geppetto123 19 points20 points  (7 children)

For the initial blast this video was created for the fears of a nuclear attack: https://youtu.be/IKqXu-5jw60

Duck and hide as soon you see the super light flash as the shockwave would follow few or less than a seconds later...

[–]Jutboy 92 points93 points  (17 children)

Climb into the fridge obviously

[–]leechkiller 67 points68 points  (4 children)

Make a sandwich and chill.

[–]bttc44 1662 points1663 points  (37 children)

Sure mistakes happen, but wow.

[–]Mikeyyyc 765 points766 points  (12 children)

I feel like there are classificationa. "Mistake" is the lowest classification. Dropping your water bottle is a mistake. This was a colossal fuckup

[–]siccoblue 226 points227 points  (2 children)

This was quite literally a fuckup of nuclear proportions

[–]SirXeus 644 points645 points  (13 children)

“Lol jk”

[–]jonnybebad5436 257 points258 points  (7 children)

"It's just a prank, bro"

[–]Catacomb82 165 points166 points  (6 children)

"It's a social experiment."

[–]Omega-Flying-Penguin 3552 points3553 points  (169 children)

My gf who is Hawaiian, had her dad call her and say that the alarm went off. He was golfing by Pearl Harbor and the sirens went off. He was going to ignore it but then he heard sirens. He thought, 'fuck, I can't ignore this.'

[–]I_AM_ETHAN_BRADBERRY 1532 points1533 points  (73 children)

This must have gone pretty f-ing high to put them on that state of readiness. Wonder what gave them the idea they were under attack?

[–]DukeJohnsonBasedGod 810 points811 points  (64 children)

Comment I saw in another thread said it was a drill and someone accidentally set off the alarm, so they might have been semi-ready and wanted to mobilise them check instead of the other way around maybe.

[–]StevieKicks 119 points120 points  (16 children)

I’m seeing on the news that that a button was accidentally pushed during a shift change. I wonder why they would have a shift change during a military exercise?

[–]Arnold_Mal 92 points93 points  (13 children)

The message specifically said, "THIS IS NOT A DRILL." Why would a drill message say that?

[–]cleeder 49 points50 points  (6 children)

Likely the process for a drill and the real thing utilizes the exact same hardware and software. The only difference being whether any external action is in fact taken by the servers, or where that external action is taken.

[–]spirit_toad 926 points927 points  (68 children)

My parents are in Hawaii for vacation. Leaving work just now for lunch I had this text on my phone from my mother, “We are under attack if something happens to us I love you”. Heart is still beating hard.

[–]SnarkOff 623 points624 points  (52 children)

My parents are in Hawaii on vacation and they “assumed it was fake” which is somehow more terrifying to me.

[–]HalvJapanskFyr 120 points121 points  (19 children)

I’m in Hawaii with my family. We had the same assumption. We were just waiting for one more source. Single source felt weird, if it was real it would have been everywhere. Nonetheless, I was one minute away from telling my wife to take our girl down to the parking garage into our rental car and wait. Looking back, I wish I would have done that as soon as we got the warnings and just looked for news on our phones there. It happened so suddenly, yet Felt so inaccurate at the same time. If that helps with how wrong it feels for your parents to assume it was false.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m still getting over wondering if I would see the rest of the day with my wife and daughter, on her birthday.

Edit: not that anyone has been angry or rude but just wanted to add that this was about three minutes of time and we were looking for radio, TV or sirens as the second source. That was general consensus in the immediate online conversations as well. To be so so clear, I should have gone for cover immediately. I get it. But hopefully you’ll cut me some slack for being a little shell shocked.

[–]rich000 37 points38 points  (4 children)

Yeah, if you're waiting 20min for confirmation on a nuclear attack you might as well just go enjoy some quiet time at the beach while everybody else is running around. Your first confirmation will be the mushroom cloud... /s

If these warnings are to have any value people have to react instantly, especially in an area like Hawaii where shelter is limited and evacuation is difficult. Only those with enough water to live a week and improvised cover would have much chance of survival.

[–]perrinzorron 200 points201 points  (6 children)

I didn't realise at first how much people felt how imminent death feels, and worse, feeling how the imminent death of your loved ones feels, my eyes got wet by reading your comment

[–]Pessi_Optimist 147 points148 points  (4 children)

Yeah after we took shelter and called our loved ones, I came to terms with death and felt a little peace and then I cried and cried.

[–]marcuschookt 40 points41 points  (1 child)

"Don't worry hun, dad fought them off. Slight bruises. Will be back tmr night. Love you."

[–]Iskallt 81 points82 points  (2 children)

"Fuck, i can't ignore this putt"

[–]phoenix0083 3434 points3435 points  (90 children)

Was stuck in stand-still traffic on Kauai for 30 minutes on the way to work this morning due to an unrelated traffic accident shutting down the only road. Got the alarm, immediately u-turned into the empty lane heading the other way, and was home with my wife a minute later.

That was honestly the most afraid I've ever felt in my life... Just knew that I didn't want shit to go down without being with my wife. As soon as we got the all clear, I broke down in tears from the tension releasing. Recovering in bed for an hour or so before heading into work.

[–]VladimirPootietang 1441 points1442 points  (31 children)

hope your boss wasn't a dick "possible atomic annihilation or not Im writing you up for being late"

[–]phoenix0083 770 points771 points  (10 children)

Lol, thankfully they were understanding. The accident had already closed the road to half the island for 2 hours before then, so when I called my manager said the AGM wanted people to come in "when they can".

[–]Smyley 136 points137 points  (5 children)

I spent a few months working on Kauai, I remember a bad accident one day had the highway redirected through some sugar cane fields. Everyone was like 4 hours late to work that day.

[–]thenewyorkgod 553 points554 points  (15 children)

I bet Norway has 8 weeks of paid atomic annihilation leave

[–]sushisection 105 points106 points  (9 children)

Why can't we have more people from that country here?

[–]TordTorden 65 points66 points  (6 children)

We're only like... 5.2 million, not much of us to share :(

[–]Exelbirth 69 points70 points  (0 children)

I just imagine that boss from Office Space saying that.

"Yeah, I'm going to have to write you up. Possible nuclear blast or not, you were hours late. Oh, and I'm going to have to ask you to come in this weekend. We lost some people this week, gonna need to play catch up."

[–]wABgtbRS79EDLfaSC3W2 155 points156 points  (0 children)

God damn.

[–]CheesedMyself 2209 points2210 points  (14 children)

A friend of my girlfriend posted this on her Facebook feed about the Four Seasons not allowing taxi drivers into their hotel for shelter.

"Got this text from my dad (taxi driver) just now. "The Four Seasons took everyone in the ballrooms but left all the taxi drivers outside. We were not invited to the ballroom to be saved. We had to burn like crispy critters."

I'm pissed. Four Seasons Resort Maui at Wailea SHAME ON YOU. Lives are LIVES. Regardless of them spending hundreds of dollars a night at your hotel or NOT. These taxi drivers bring people TO YOUR HOTEL.

Now I understand this was a false alarm but WTF?! At the time they thought it was real. I will NEVER EVER recommend anyone to stay there ever again.

And for those of you who haven't heard what just happened in Hawaii, basically someone mistakenly sent out a Missile launch warning for Hawaii. But later said, just kidding. False alarm. Someone is definitely getting fired."

[–]ns39 52 points53 points  (0 children)

I heard from Family... Same thing happened at Target and Walmart with customers. “Shelter in place” doesn’t mean “kick everyone out.”

[–]Nudetypist 291 points292 points  (1 child)

I hope this gets upvoted more. I don't understand how the security guards would even still be working during that time. I'd be in the basement with the guests, go ahead and fire me.

[–]Febtober2k 1178 points1179 points  (47 children)

Please remain in your homes, if you are not at home, find shelter immediately. Close all blinds and shades, block out all windows.

Do not look outside.

Do not look at the sky.

Do not make noise.

Your cooperation is vital to your survival. Appointed government personnel will update you shortly.

[–]ccmac86 185 points186 points  (20 children)

Was this from an ask Reddit thread? I'm totally gapping on where I've heard this before.

[–]Jellye 320 points321 points  (14 children)

It started in a Writing Prompt, but it became a novel, with a subreddit, YouTube videos, etc.

The Phenomenon, I think it's called.

[–]Stuck_In_the_Matrix 148 points149 points  (10 children)

This reminds me of an old Reddit thread (I think it was /r/askreddit) that basically said, "Come up with the most ominous and scary warning you can think of ..."

Someone came up with something so scary and chilling, I was shaking and had to log off Reddit for the night. It wasn't just what they were writing but how they wrote it.

[–]basa1 56 points57 points  (3 children)

Sounds like when /r/writingprompts wasn't a default

[–]TechIsCool 118 points119 points  (2 children)

Blue two is in effect.

[–]BobbyDigital302 76 points77 points  (3 children)

The whole state of Hawaii now has PTSD

[–]IronMyr 16 points17 points  (2 children)

Good time to be a therapist in Hawaii.

[–]sorahito 968 points969 points  (71 children)

I live on Kauai where we have PMRF - Pacific Missile Range Facility where they test missiles. It also only has -1- highway. This morning there was a major accident by a bottleneck area on said highway that occurred at 6am. My husband was in traffic trying to get to work when he heard on the radio and got a text alert that there was a ballistic missile heading towards Hawaii. He and a few others made an immediate U-turn (other lane was absolutely empty as the highway had apparently been closed in both lanes for some time). Husband zoomed home super fast because if we was gon' die, we gon' die togetha. That said, traffic was still at a stand-still till about 9:15 when it finally started to clear up a bit.

I laugh at this now but my husband was very worried and concerned. I had faith in PMRF but this false alarm has taught me that we need to be more prepared. The roads can so quickly become congested beyond use in a real emergency. I'm not saying I'm going to become a "Prepper" but it would behoove me to be better prepared for any sort of disaster. I do also live in a tsunami zone as well so it can't hurt :D

EDIT: Apparently PMRF is -just- a testing facility and isn't actually operational. There had been talks before about making operational. Am told by a friend that it could be possible to make PMRF operational but there just aren't a lot of actual military personnel that live here. Otherwise, I was informed that there are other "assets" to handle things but it isn't 100% foolproof. The Hawaii Department of Defense does have a simple guide on Nuclear Detonation guide from the Hawaii Emergency Management Agency that is worthwhile to take a gander - it had been updated just last year :D

[–]Mr3n1gma 1046 points1047 points  (33 children)

Your husband is u/phoenix0083 your welcome.

[–]sorahito 596 points597 points  (6 children)

Damnit... I'm so used to him looking at his phone on Reddit that I didn't think he would post. Man hardly ever posts anything.... I was even trying to save him face too!

Well, he apparently was zooming home so fast the neighbor saw and called me 10 minutes later to let me know that it was a false alarm (she has a family member working at pmrf).

[–]Mr3n1gma 99 points100 points  (2 children)

Haha I’m glad I could contribute to this moment that’s pretty awesome!

[–]phoenix0083 467 points468 points  (13 children)

Lol, indeed I am

[–]sorahito 352 points353 points  (9 children)

Honey, please don't forget to bring home the water crackers. We also need some dry Swifter wipes. If you can get me some red wine vinegar then I can make us some Greek salad tonight. I love you dearly. And don't forget to drink water at work!

[–]blackrose2007 89 points90 points  (2 children)

New phone,who dis?

[–]sorahito 48 points49 points  (1 child)

clears throat

CHEE HOO!

[–]phoenix0083 33 points34 points  (0 children)

Who would have thought a shopping list could earn this much karma, lol.

[–]Laurasaur28 20 points21 points  (0 children)

This is so wholesome.

[–]MrBoo88 63 points64 points  (4 children)

People make fun of Preppers, but really everyone should have some sort of bag or stash just for emergencies.

[–]DeepDishPi 50 points51 points  (3 children)

HOLY SHIT, I wonder how many heart attacks this kickstarted.

[–]Oberon_Swanson 99 points100 points  (2 children)

Someone just picked a whole bouquet of oopsie-daisies.

[–]VGStarcall 281 points282 points  (4 children)

r/conspiracy is losing their shit lol

[–]0235 81 points82 points  (1 child)

actually, the thread about it is utterly hilarious. I have never seen them so light hearted.

[–]grey_lake 1140 points1141 points  (116 children)

Everyone needs to stop and take a moment to think about how they reacted to this. This is a learning exercise. I stopped what I was doing, woke up my roommates, packed a bag of non-perishables and supplies, filled up water bottles, and tried to locate the nearest nuclear shelter. This would likely have been insufficient. This is the uncomfortable reality we now live in, be prepared. I wasn't all the way ready for this, and that unnerves me. Take precautions to stay safe.

[–]wABgtbRS79EDLfaSC3W2 612 points613 points  (58 children)

I live in Los Angeles. Opened Google Maps and searched for ‘nuclear shelter’. Nothing. We’re fucked.

[–]Brancher 470 points471 points  (23 children)

Crawl in your fridge.

[–]suprtommyman 256 points257 points  (15 children)

If fallout 4 taught me anything, this leads to the best outcome.

[–]dpgtfc 137 points138 points  (9 children)

Lol, where did this happen in fallout 4? I remember this was an Indiana Jones meme from the latest terrible movie, but I didn't run across this in the game.

Ninja Edit: Oops, now I think I remember (go figure)- gonna leave my comment up though, it wasn't the main character was it, it was that one boy you found in the fridge.

[–]ilikepugs 114 points115 points  (7 children)

Supposedly the kid in the fridge was meant to be a reference to the Indiana Jones scene.

Edit: Also the first time I played fallout 4, I brought the kid back to his family, they thanked me, then they immediately became hostile and started attacking me. Fuck those guys.

[–]BlueShellOP 39 points40 points  (5 children)

There was also a skeleton in a fridge in Fallout: New Vegas if you picked the starting perk that enabled the more wacky events. IIRC, there was also a brown Fedora you could pick up from said corpse.

[–]beingheldmomentarily 94 points95 points  (7 children)

I live in NYC, and here you can see Fallout Shelter signs on many buildings, but those signs are obsolete relics of the Cold War.

Fallout Shelters used to be constructed, stockpiled and maintained by the Federal Government, but they have been abandoned decades ago, and these spaces have been mostly reclaimed by the property owners and converted to storage rooms, laundry rooms, or such.

Currently, emergency services would advise survivors to retreat to basement or core of the building, away from doors and windows, which should be closed. The idea is to maximize amount of heavy building construction materials between you and radioactive exterior environment. Cars are not good, since sheet metal and glass would not shield you from radioactive particles. Find a relevant .gov site and see what they have say.

In any case, there is a lesson to be learned from recent natural disasters such as Hurricane Katrina or 2017 hurricanes, which is that help is very slow in coming and you should not count on it. Radioactive fallout would further delay any help, so in extreme event like that you would be on your own.

The only choice that you have is to either plan accordingly for extreme disasters or to just give up worrying now, figure that it is unlikely to happen to you, and forget about it.

[–]8__ 20 points21 points  (0 children)

NYC is removing those signs, given that nuclear threats are back yet many of those sites aren't maintained. They don't want someone seeking shelter and coming to a locked door.

[–]faithfulscrub 76 points77 points  (8 children)

If anything good came out of this it’s a wake up call. Hopefully people realize how unprepared they were and that they most likely would not have lived had this been real, and that they should prepare for the future.

[–]rudius 166 points167 points  (7 children)

I slept through the alarm somehow and my roommate was freaking out and banging on my door. She asked me about it and I shrugged it off and tried to go back to bed...probably not the best reaction now that I think about it. I think in the back of my mind I knew it was a false alarm...plus i really wanted to sleep in.

[–]GogurtIsJustYogurt 200 points201 points  (5 children)

I think a blast going off and evaporating everything while you sleep is probably the best case scenario

[–]trontorjoscro 45 points46 points  (0 children)

Yep! And you get that feeling of sleeping in if someone tells you and you shrug it off.

[–]LobsterGarden 47 points48 points  (3 children)

Same here, turns out there are no designated nuclear shelters anywhere in the state.

[–]Tinybluemoon 487 points488 points  (34 children)

My parents live in Hawaii and I was talking to my mom when it happened, holy fuck that was terrifying and the worst part was that there wasn't anything she could do. There's no hiding from a nuke

[–]ScorpianZero 448 points449 points  (30 children)

Actually there is.

“Duck and cover drills”, etc, are usually ridiclued, but they aren’t designed to help people close to a detonation - who are fucked. They are designed to limit casualties further away, from things like flying glass and falling roof tiles and so on. So if you get a warning, act as if a detonation is going to take place several mikes away and do the things you would do in a drill. DELETED ***

Also carry replacement underwear

*** as others have pointed out, some of this advice might be flawed. Deleted to be safe. Best consult some professional/official advice.

[–]TheGhostofSwitzer 165 points166 points  (12 children)

We all assume North Korea will be able to directly hit Hawaii. If they're even 10 miles off a duck and cover could save lives

[–][deleted] 76 points77 points  (2 children)

All good advice, except for the hands. Put them under your stomach. You absolutely need to prevent your hands from getting burnt.

[–]marcuschookt 31 points32 points  (1 child)

make yourself as small as possible

That's why I always have a pocket mirror on hand. It's so I can tell myself how fat and ugly I look, works everytime.

[–]Scorch089 510 points511 points  (23 children)

I am in Maui with my GF's family. We we're all getting up and mulling about when all the phones went nuts. We don't live here, so we had no idea where to go. The air bnb we are staying at does not have a parking garage. It was a strange array of emotions in the household as everyone came to terms with mortality. Death may be imminent and there's nothing we can do about it. Half the group had the nihlistic view of let's what's the missle come in and meet our doom head on. The other group was thinking survival steps. Get water, shoes on, etc. My thinking was, I need more information, like a true redditor. I wanted to know which island was targeted with what kind of missle, how much time we had and what our options were. I got the TV on and there wasn't anything in the news. Twitter of all things was what brought the news of a false alarm. Once that word spread through the house, the booze was opened and everybody calmed down. Weird experience to think you might not exist in a few minutes. Also great experience to find out your going to live and there is an array of booze to help cope with the stress.

Edit: misspelling half with have.

[–]snowfaller 92 points93 points  (5 children)

Well, now you know what South Korea and Japan are dealing with.

[–]AmNotAnAtomicPlayboy 174 points175 points  (4 children)

Dallas, Texas April 7th 2017. I sympathize with you my Hawaiian friends. It's terrifying to receive this kind of alert, with no information from other sources; only this alert of a major incident with no confirmation.

I spend the midnight hour anxiously checking every source of information I had access to, chatting with friends through any medium available trying to release tension and convincing ourselves we weren't about to die. I spent an hour on the phone with my 72 year old mother talking her through an anxiety attack until her half valium took effect and knocked her out. I spent time chatting with my fatalist PTSD prone friend convincing her now was not the time to break out the razor blades. I'm actually glad I had these responsibilities to concentrate on because it meant I could keep my own rising panic firmly quashed.

If they find out this was not a horrible accident and was in fact the result of someone's prank, or worse, a provocation; I hope they drag the fucker responsible naked over the nearest coral bed.

[–]BrigetteBardot 52 points53 points  (0 children)

Don't stress the coral out too

[–][deleted] 199 points200 points  (19 children)

Question: How do you accidentally send a mass text message alerting an entire state that they’re going to die from a ballistic missile, and that it’s not a drill?

[–]MarcsterS 34 points35 points  (0 children)

This is a Cold War level of a mistake.

[–]XproGamingXpro 31 points32 points  (0 children)

My girlfriend and her family are in Hawaii right now and she woke me up with a text saying there was a ballistic missile headed for them and lots of goodbyes. That was the scariest few minutes of my life basically saying goodbye and trying to calm her down.

[–]ZGiSH 34 points35 points  (1 child)

I wonder how many "last message" texts were sent between people

[–][deleted] 37 points38 points  (0 children)

Crazy. I was woken up by my residents knocking to ask what to do (I’m a Resident Assistant at UH Manoa). For 5 minutes I absolutely thought I was going to die.

One of my residents was talking to her mom and her cell phone cut out and the mom thought that was because the missile hit.

Just the amount of panic and fear. Now we also have a lot of parents who want their kids to transfer back to the mainland.

Crazy day.

[–]Donald__Cuck_ 36 points37 points  (3 children)

This is dangerous as shit. If we ever get a real alert like this in the near future, people are going to question if it's real or not and not act on it like they should. Especially those who went through this already.

[–]mtntopgrowler 148 points149 points  (2 children)

My cousin (who's also my best friend) was stationed down there with the Air Force until last year and is down there right now seeing some old buddies. He calls me this morning saying "go to Hawaii they said, it'll be fun they said. Now there's a ballistic missile launch warning." I laughed and thought he was joking. My heart instantly sank when he said everybody got a text message alert. I almost started freaking out when I heard the sirens come through the phone. He said he had to go and said "I love you, man." I said "I love you too" and was shaking as I ran to my computer to see what was going on.

tl;dr I thought my best friend in the world was going to die and was waiting for the news or the internet to tell me.

[–]JackyeLondon 173 points174 points  (12 children)

If it was a real missile, other countries would've detected it as well. Or maybe it really was a missile from a submarine but it was shot down, but this is conspiracy material and doesn't make much sense since NK and SK are returning to the talking table.

[–]Santos_J 24 points25 points  (0 children)

I live in Hawaii and thank god my phone was on silent cuz I slept right thru that shit. My parents were at Safeway when the alert when out and everyone went into apocalypse mode man. People were freaking the fuck out, cryin and screaming. He said it was fucking crazy.

The guy responsible for this needs to be held accountable and stuff man. There could’ve been wrecks, looting, and people could’ve killed themselves before they’re apparent to end u know ?

[–]Merlo7 23 points24 points  (1 child)

Lol my family and I were in Kailua when the alert came on and went to the gas station to get some snacks. We asked the worker how she felt and she goes "Well, if there's a missile, what am I gonna do? I work at a gas station, I'm gonna go BOOM."

[–]smilodon138 22 points23 points  (5 children)

I'm from Hawaii and immediately called my parents. My dad decided that it was a good excuse not to take his morning jog & my mom spent the 38mins trying to heard our cats inside.

[–]Merlo7 66 points67 points  (7 children)

I live in Hawaii (Oahu) and the situation was ridiculous and hilarious. First off, I was at my brother's taekwando class and right when everyone got the emergency alert, parents started rushing in to grab their children, teens were on the phone crying to their parents about what to do, and a couple other people kept saying "Omg guys calm down it's just a hack." I wasn't even nervous about the missile because I hadn't even gotten the emergency alert on my phone so I spent the whole half hour being pissed that if there was an actual emergency and I was just at home, that I wouldn't have known what the hell was going on. Ironically, what also kept me call was the fact that we're on an island, so if a missile was really going to hit us, where the hell was I gonna go? Down the street?

At the end of the whole fiasco, I get an email from my university telling me the alert was a false alarm, BEFORE I get the government emergency alert.

Shout out to UH emergency alert emails for being useful this time instead of just telling me that the elevators in the C building don't work.

[–]Bad-Science 113 points114 points  (5 children)

I live in the evacuation zone of a nuke plant. The sirens have gone off so many times as false alarms that locals barely notice them anymore. So they have zero value.

[–]omento 62 points63 points  (1 child)

More than slightly concerning. I feel like anything involving something nuclear powered should warrant some consideration, even if it’s a false alarm.

On the other hand, maybe their systems/tests need some updating depending on the frequency of false alarms...

[–]StoweVT 19 points20 points  (0 children)

9 months from now there are gonna be a lot of "THIS IS NOT A DRILL" babies being born in Hawaii hospitals. Someone should make sure there are extra staff on call that week.

[–]kokopelli73 42 points43 points  (8 children)

My family was finishing up breakfast when the alert went off on my phone. We will be putting together an emergency kit and find out where the closest fallout shelter is, but in the spur of the moment we piled our four year old and one year old into the car, still wearing our pajamas and nothing else, and I drove like a bat out of hell to the closest tunnel.

I had not ever planned to have to explain to my four year old what a “blistic” missile was.

Still trying to process emotionally.

[–]fungobat 47 points48 points  (1 child)

"So, tell me about the worst mistake you ever made?"

[–]dirtymoney 103 points104 points  (4 children)

I wonder if anyone killed themselves thinking this was the end. Hop.e not

[–]Liquidska 33 points34 points  (1 child)

I didn't even consider this... Jesus...

[–]LennonForPresident 28 points29 points  (0 children)

And heart attacks too, people can just drop dead from shock n fear.

[–]mperez4855 19 points20 points  (1 child)

I wonder how many people, who were had a long time secret crush, confessed and are now in a relationship because of this.

[–]kalel1980 38 points39 points  (1 child)

I would really to know how this mistake was made.

[–]Amahoney77 665 points666 points  (103 children)

What an egregious error; somebody needs to be fired. That’s incredibly irresponsible.

[–]FireCrack 148 points149 points  (8 children)

Perhaps, but not the person who activated it. It is a design flaw to have a system where the things can happen 'accidentaly'

[–]Kenham2702 18 points19 points  (0 children)

'New phone, no number saved. Who dis?'

[–]samanthalovesyou 16 points17 points  (2 children)

For anybody wondering please read this:

If you are driving and get this alert on your phone, over the radio, or both - do not FIRST jump into a ditch. It will do nothing. Immediately look for either a Bank of America or Wells Fargo bank(I believe any bank would suffice). Banks are legally required to take in civilians and post a small "Nuclear Shelter Inside" sticker outside their front doors for this very purpose.

So, again, if you hear this and you know you're near a bank - punch it to either the bank or an open sewer man-hole. Not a stupid ditch. Physics, air pressure, heat, and fallout radiation will not care if you are in a ditch.