top 200 commentsshow 500

[–]TooShiftyForYou 2829 points2830 points  (8 children)

"Be careful to avoid this new stuff."

[–][deleted]  (4 children)


    [–]metalqueen033 149 points150 points  (3 children)

    I’m assuming these 2 comments are EXACTLY what happened.

    [–]Shittinbrix88 22 points23 points  (2 children)

    That's because those two comments are the dogs posting their thoughts. Duh!

    [–]1337butterfly 10.1k points10.1k points  (141 children)

    maybe they think you got a new carpet and they don't want to get mud on it?

    [–]dvariables 2998 points2999 points  (128 children)

    Imagine if you were barefoot and your feet were full of mud and you walked into the room. What feels more comfy for muddy feet: carpet (which is essentially floor towels), or hard clear plastic?

    If you human had to walk with muddy feet onto hard plastic, you'd avoid it too.

    Solution: Put an inexpensive rug or washable towels on top of the hard plastic!

    [–]JTswift 708 points709 points  (95 children)

    But then how do you keep that rug or towels clean?

    [–]LassyKongo 1681 points1682 points  (74 children)

    put a plastic cover on it

    [–]DimeInPieces 569 points570 points  (66 children)

    But what if the dogs won't walk on the plastic?

    [–]confused_boner 802 points803 points  (57 children)

    put a rug over it

    [–]canyoutriforce 546 points547 points  (54 children)

    But how will you keep that rug clean??

    [–]mira_ 813 points814 points  (42 children)

    Walk around it.

    [–]pistoncivic 473 points474 points  (38 children)

    Well, I feel we just wasted a hundred bucks on throw rugs and plastic

    [–]Turok876 684 points685 points  (5 children)

    Yeah but what a ride, man.

    [–]Grimnur87 151 points152 points  (1 child)

    Keep going, once you get close to the ceiling nobody will be able to enter!

    [–]rahul_shagrithaya 85 points86 points  (9 children)

    What are we even trying to achieve here? A castle made of rugs and plastic?

    [–]CSKING444 57 points58 points  (9 children)

    so now which one is on the top, rug or plastic?

    [–]rabidstoat 28 points29 points  (5 children)

    Not to mention that taken far enough, you'll need to get a stepladder to walk through the doorway.

    [–]IhateSteveJones 10 points11 points  (0 children)

    Underrated comment right here

    [–]Stok3dJ 12 points13 points  (1 child)

    So the dogs aren't ass clowns. They are correct?

    [–]regoapps 2 points3 points  (0 children)

    The floor is lava!

    [–]ForgetwhatTheysaid 47 points48 points  (0 children)

    It's carpet inception.

    [–]NotCyberborg 18 points19 points  (4 children)

    Happy Cakeday

    I mean, put plastic over it

    [–]cookie-23 28 points29 points  (1 child)

    But what if they don’t want to walk on that plastic?

    Btw I love that word “assclown”. It’s my new favorite insult.

    [–]Mr_Quiscalus 5 points6 points  (0 children)

    Watch Office Space, great movie.

    [–]canyoutriforce 18 points19 points  (1 child)

    holy shit i didn't even realize it was my cakeday! thank you!

    [–]LuizZak 2 points3 points  (0 children)

    Seal it

    [–]Direwolf_3 27 points28 points  (4 children)

    🎵Put a rug on it! 🎶

    [–]SofaKingCrizpy 31 points32 points  (1 child)

    If you liked it then you should have put a rug on it!

    [–]unschd_faith_change 5 points6 points  (0 children)

    Don't be mad when they won't walk on it

    [–][deleted]  (4 children)


      [–]opiates4life 11 points12 points  (2 children)

      Buy one of these, they come in 2 sizes in addition to a new runner size and thank me later! These things are AMAZING at absorbing the monsoon of shit that my German Shepherd’s manage to track in the house. Now that I know they have runner size, I just ordered it from amazon to replace the runner I have in the hallway right after the doorway that already has one of the original square type. They wash and dry really easy and the amount of water the rug consumes is nothing short of amazing lol

      Dog Gone Smart Dirty Dog Doormat, Runner, Brown


      [–]bobsbountifulburgers 13 points14 points  (0 children)

      Depending on what kind it is, you spray it down with a hose or throw it into one of those big laundromat washers

      [–]omninode 10 points11 points  (0 children)

      If you’re going to have dogs, you might have to let go of the dream of clean carpet.

      [–]WrinklyTidbits 7 points8 points  (2 children)

      You have two sets: throw one set in the laundry one week and replace with other set. Rinse and repeat.

      [–]snackysnacksnacks 127 points128 points  (5 children)

      Bed, bath, and beyond has big cheap rugs (for dorms) around when school starts - even cheaper if you take a gamble and wait for them to go on clearance in a week or two after school starts. Like $20 for a 7x8 (yeah they are weird sizes too, I think for dorms). For the past 4 yeas I've bought one as the "dog rug" and literally put it in my calendar to go but a new one because it was such a good deal. They're so cheap I would just throw it away or move it to the basement.

      Just mentioning in case this helps someone following your advice.

      [–]avidworks 22 points23 points  (2 children)

      Even better, buy one of the indoor/outdoor rugs at Home Depot for $20. They come 6 x 8.

      [–]ashwee_ 25 points26 points  (0 children)

      Ooh and then use the coupon they always give out for 20% off one item or the $5 off coupon! I save those coupons every time I get them the mail and my local bed bath and beyond let's me use a few at a time each purchase and they never care if there expired. Can't beat that!

      [–]birdablaze 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      So does Big Lots!

      [–]Cogs_For_Brains 47 points48 points  (2 children)

      As a carpet cleaner I would recommend just an area rug that fully covers the area around the door (one they cant step around) or have a carpet cleaner lay down a Teflon protector spray on the carpeted area by the doorway. It helps prevent spills and wet mud from binding to the carpet so it just wipes up.

      But Teflon protector has to be reapplied when you have your carpets cleaned so it can be expensive in the long run so i normally recommend to just get a crappy area rug from Wal-Mart.

      [–][deleted]  (1 child)


        [–]grsymonkey 5 points6 points  (0 children)

        You can try getting a bath rug or an outdoor carpet as well. Bath rugs you csn throw in a washer if it isnt too large znd the outdoor ones just get hosed off.

        [–]NotMrMike 2 points3 points  (0 children)

        I use towels for my dogs, just cheapo second-hand towels, we have a cupboard full of them just for the dogs. Put them on the floor, wash them after a couple days and replace with other towels.

        [–]TheCheeseGod 80 points81 points  (1 child)

        "Mustn't step on the new, shiney, magical floor, or master will get mad."

        • Dogs

        [–]thatvoicewasreal 9 points10 points  (0 children)

        "Yeah I get it but fuck if I'm walking on anything slippery." --German Shepherds.

        [–]Ragethashit 14 points15 points  (0 children)

        I know too well this behaviour from my dog, she wouldn't walk on anything that is plastic, cause of the weird sound it makes...

        [–]poopellar 38 points39 points  (0 children)

        And they don't bath because they don't want to get the water dirty.

        [–]jordanmindyou 11 points12 points  (0 children)

        I would guess it’s slippery and the dogs would prefer having a good grip on the floor so they can better control where they go instead of face planting on the slippery plastic

        [–]ilivedownyourroad 2 points3 points  (0 children)

        Haha genius . Love pets.

        [–]DaydreamKid 1029 points1030 points  (12 children)

        Plastic runners are lava.

        [–]lemoninski 2141 points2142 points  (46 children)

        Cover the entire room with the runners. Now they have no choice. You've got them this time!!

        [–]NibblyPig 2153 points2154 points  (19 children)

        witness the birth of hoverdoge

        [–]4L33T 225 points226 points  (5 children)

        Exactly, then you can remove the runners once you've trained the dogs to hover, and go back to plain old carpet without fear of mud

        [–]_noxx 24 points25 points  (3 children)

        If they move too quickly with too much mud it will cause a mud shower friend.

        [–]TheNoodleSmuggler 16 points17 points  (2 children)

        How do they get mud on themselves in the first place if they can hover?

        [–]DeepFriedDresden 5 points6 points  (1 child)

        Oh being able to hover does not replace the thrill of rolling around in the muddiest spot in the yard.

        [–]AmateurHero 5 points6 points  (0 children)

        r/shittyAskScience needs brilliant minds like yourself. Inquire within.

        [–]VelociraptorVacation 128 points129 points  (7 children)


        [–]PGDesign 31 points32 points  (5 children)

        Altogether now, to the tune of spiderman/spiderpig: "Spiderdoge spiderdodge, does whatever Spiderdoge does"

        [–][deleted]  (2 children)


          [–]afarris5 6 points7 points  (1 child)

          This should need no explanation

          [–]FourteenFour 9 points10 points  (0 children)

          furniture is the new floor

          [–]radditor5 53 points54 points  (5 children)

          They will jump onto the filing cabinet and walk across the desk.

          [–]Calluhad 19 points20 points  (0 children)

          The floor is made of lava.

          [–]WalkinSteveHawkin 32 points33 points  (2 children)

          You know, this was my grandmother’s logic with upholstered furniture. I never understood it. What’s the point of having soft furniture if you’re going to cover it in hard, sticky plastic, which also looks pretty ugly? I totally get covering the parts that get beat-up the most, like the arm and foot rests, but damn man don’t do the whole thing

          [–]dnalloheoj 36 points37 points  (1 child)

          You'll thank her when she passes and the time comes that the family gets to raid her house of all their awesome stuff that's in impeccable condition.

          And then you'll realize it still wasn't worth it because the couch probably has a floral pattern that dates it back to the 80s and isn't even remotely comfortable anymore.

          [–]dnalloheoj 23 points24 points  (7 children)

          We have one dog who HATES tile/hardwood floors because his paw-fur gets so long that he starts to slip.

          If we did something like that, he'd absolutely just sit at the door and be like, 'I don't understand why you did this to me...'

          [–]DocAtDuq 3 points4 points  (3 children)

          Do you trim your dogs paw fur? Any time I groom or trim my wheaten’s nails I trim the fur in between his pads

          [–][deleted]  (64 children)


            [–]bclagge 122 points123 points  (40 children)

            True, but you can slow the decay. I stop her at the door and wipe my shepherds feet as she comes in if it’s wet outside.

            /u/nomangm, trim the hair on their pads and they won’t hold quite as much filth. You can do a half assed job with scissors, or a groomer can buzz it for you. They should do it ala carte while you wait. If you use a home trimmer you will almost certainly jam or break the blade.

            [–]Back_To_The_Oilfield 53 points54 points  (33 children)

            I’ve never had any trouble with mud, but the fucking ticks in the summer. Holy shit. We’ve tried fucking everything.

            [–]vu1xVad0 314 points315 points  (0 children)

            We’ve tried fucking everything.

            There's your problem. You need to stop fornicating and actually deal with the problem itself.

            [–]old_shart 32 points33 points  (7 children)

            Nexgard. It is about $20 a month per dog, worth it.

            [–]Miss_Awesomeness 24 points25 points  (3 children)

            Nexgard is a goddamn fucking miracle. That is worth every penny. We lived with my mom through a summer with our shepherd- she had three cats and a basset hound, in a neighborhood of abandoned homes and pets. We put the dogs on nexgard and within days all ticks and fleas died. Before nexgard it was impossible to control. That stuff immediately improved the lives of all the pets.

            [–]caycan 5 points6 points  (0 children)

            I’ve used this. It works well

            [–]fayryover 2 points3 points  (0 children)

            My vet offers that or activyl activyl is $15 a month and works really well for my dogs

            [–]bclagge 63 points64 points  (2 children)

            I consider ticks to be evidence there is no god.

            [–]netino 6 points7 points  (0 children)

            I'm like that with mosquitos.

            [–]ryguygoesawry 44 points45 points  (3 children)

            Fucking everything probably isn't the solution. Sure, it feels good, but it's not getting rid of ticks.

            [–]playhy 11 points12 points  (2 children)

            But what if they try fucking the ticks. That’s sure to scare them away.

            [–]ryguygoesawry 11 points12 points  (0 children)

            Sure, with regular ticks. But /u/Back_To_The_Oilfield has "fucking ticks".

            [–]chrislbraman 7 points8 points  (1 child)

            If you have room, guinea fowl are tick eating machines.

            [–][deleted]  (5 children)


              [–]deanbmmv 42 points43 points  (2 children)

              Invoking the Great Old Ones is maybe a bit of a disproportionate response to ticks.

              [–]SaysReddit 6 points7 points  (0 children)

              I feel like you haven't had to deal with multiple ticks at once...

              [–]Toucani 15 points16 points  (6 children)

              My two dogs are exactly this too. Avoid the towels and rugs at all costs and try to head straight for the rooms with carpet. Thankfully I've got tiles in the porch and kitchen but could do with getting wood in the living room.

              [–]LunchboxRoyale 17 points18 points  (4 children)

              Check into vinyl plank! It looks like wood, but is 100 % waterproof and pet-proof.

              [–]Kiwi-98 8 points9 points  (1 child)

              I have vinyl floors, can confirm, it's awesome! I don't have dogs, but you could spill stuff on it all day long and it doesn't get damaged at all. Also it doesn't scratch easily like wood does with dog claws especially.

              [–]LunchboxRoyale 6 points7 points  (0 children)

              Yeah, I recommend it for all people with active lives who don't want to have to worry about their floor. The manufacturers have come a long way with this flooring, making it look like actual wood. We put a lot of it in our customers' homes, and most people love it!

              [–]ALargeRock 105 points106 points  (5 children)

              This guy doggos

              [–][deleted]  (3 children)


                [–]workroom 12 points13 points  (2 children)

                why has no one suggested simply getting rid of all of the mud in the world outside their home?

                [–]barnes80 5 points6 points  (3 children)

                I always think to myself that I want a dog. I grew up with dogs as a kid and it was the best, because didn't notice the pain points.

                Then I see posts like these and realize I may not be able to handle dogs. I have to cover up my carpet in order to protect my carpet from dogs? So I have to stare at these ugly covers? What is the point of having the carpet if I cover them all up anyway?

                [–]Beatles-are-best 5 points6 points  (1 child)

                Carpet is less important than dogs. Also if you really care that much about the floors then get laminate flooring everywhere. That's also fashionable so it'll look good too if that's what you're worried about

                [–]jsuzcrust 1225 points1226 points  (25 children)

                Up vote for assclowns

                [–]shawndotb 34 points35 points  (4 children)

                Michael Bolton said it best.

                [–]dirtydayboy 21 points22 points  (3 children)

                That no-talent assclown

                [–]dalittle 17 points18 points  (1 child)

                Why should I change my name? He”s the one that sucks.

                [–]Bruticusprime2 102 points103 points  (11 children)

                I didn’t think anybody else used that word but I stand corrected

                [–]m_zc 39 points40 points  (5 children)

                If I want start using it can I? Or will I end up paying royalties?

                [–][deleted]  (4 children)


                  [–]Vanidor 42 points43 points  (2 children)

                  You wouldn't download a car, would you?

                  [–][deleted]  (1 child)


                    [–]GiveMeCheesecake 12 points13 points  (0 children)

                    Wow, this guy downloads alright.

                    [–]0spooky2me 7 points8 points  (2 children)

                    Made me think of Chris Jericho in the early 2000's.

                    [–]Beat_the_Deadites 6 points7 points  (0 children)

                    Which made me think of 'Listen up, Slapnuts!', but I guess that was Jeff Jarrett.

                    [–]theoreticallyben 925 points926 points  (33 children)

                    It’s probably because it’s an unusual texture. Give it time and they may get used to it. They could end up avoiding it forever though. I’d recommend trying a reward based system to train them to use it. Of course, if they’re going in and out quite a bit that may prove inefficient.

                    [–]the_visalian 470 points471 points  (21 children)

                    reward based system

                    While they’re outside, lay an inch-thick slab of peanut butter down the middle of the plastic. Gradually reduce amount of peanut butter.

                    [–]SpooledSRT 233 points234 points  (11 children)

                    This is going to sound crazy, but you can put that mat directly in front of the door.

                    [–]umnikos 72 points73 points  (6 children)

                    They're probably gonna jump over it

                    [–]mrgonzalez 126 points127 points  (5 children)

                    Put it where they land

                    [–]ultimate-hopeless 226 points227 points  (4 children)

                    I don't want my doggos to float away dude, wtf.

                    [–]mrgonzalez 31 points32 points  (2 children)

                    Mate you just put an overhang with plastic runner as the ceiling to prevent that from happening. And then you feed this into a torus-shaped construction that the dogs can travel within.

                    [–]zacharyangrk 8 points9 points  (0 children)

                    This thread is lovely haha

                    [–]Tarbogman 12 points13 points  (2 children)

                    This is going to sound crazier, but training dogs to clean their feet is super easy.

                    Have them walk in circles (spin around) outside on the concrete / old carpet / door mat / artificial turf before letting them back in.

                    [–]puthiminthevan 11 points12 points  (5 children)

                    Do you want ants? Cause that's how you get ants...

                    [–]TheGreenJedi 2 points3 points  (0 children)

                    Ding ding ding

                    [–]rsqejfwflqkj 16 points17 points  (2 children)

                    Or replace it with some towels at the door that are comfortable for their feet, takes care of the mud, and that you can also just pick up and throw in the wash. Everyone wins...

                    [–][deleted]  (19 children)


                      [–]ilikesalad 77 points78 points  (7 children)

                      Trained my dog to hold up her paws. I just say "paws" and she holds them up for me to inspect or clean off.

                      [–]TolkienAwoken 23 points24 points  (2 children)

                      Yeah, I dogsat and inadvertently taught their dogs to do something similar. I'd pat my legs to have the pups put their paws up on them (I was sitting on stairs in the garage) so I could clean em up. They caught on REAL quick and now the owners just roll with it. Used to have to chase em around the garage with a towel. Dogs are neat, man.

                      [–]RayNele 2 points3 points  (1 child)

                      Can't get my dog to do anything.

                      Can't make her eat, can't make her stop barking up a storm when someone walks into the house.

                      [–]craftynerd 6 points7 points  (0 children)

                      Have you tried turning it off and then on again?

                      [–]redditversiontwo 30 points31 points  (0 children)

                      Gosh...they are smart...if you say that to me I would cease thinking you said 'pause'

                      [–]AndyB16 2 points3 points  (0 children)

                      I can't even teach my 12 year old kid to hang his coat up instead of just throwing it in the hall closet.

                      [–]Atomic_Rarity 55 points56 points  (6 children)

                      Yep, it can get tedious, but just toweling off their paws is the best route. Of course they'll fight it at first, but soon they'll come in one at a time to get their paws clean

                      [–]bclagge 28 points29 points  (4 children)

                      Yeah, if you’re consistent about it they pick it up really quick. Wiping their paws might be tedious, but not nearly as much as mopping my terrazzo...

                      [–]dethmaul 31 points32 points  (1 child)

                      Sometimes I'll put a water bowl on the porch that i jam their feet into and swish around.

                      [–]VivaKryptonite 3 points4 points  (0 children)

                      This. My Great Dane likes to go out and dig in the red mud. I’ve got a bucket that I swish each paw around in individually and then squeeze in a towel before he is allowed to come back inside. He knows the drill.

                      [–]baicai18 142 points143 points  (21 children)

                      I bought one of those blackhole litter mats for my cat so it would hopefully collect most of it. Extra big one at that. That punk cat decides, nope, let's just long jump over it spraying more litter everywhere

                      [–]dethmaul 31 points32 points  (10 children)

                      My foster kittens taught me what a pain in the dick wet litter is. They shovel litter out of the bix and tip over their water bowl. The underside if the box was a fucking pile of slime. The clumping litter absorbed the water puddle and turned into something you can't sweep or mop, just grab handfuls of and shove into a trash bag. Then paper towel the shit out of the floor.

                      [–]Gonzobot 20 points21 points  (2 children)

                      Get a shopvac and clean with water. You're picking up clay, just wash it off for easiest cleanup. Spray water, vacuum water, wipe up whatever's left on the surface.

                      And don't make your cats shit and eat in the same place.

                      [–]CatBedParadise 27 points28 points  (1 child)

                      And don't make your cats shit and eat in the same place.

                      Worth saying twice.

                      [–]janebirkin 10 points11 points  (1 child)

                      I know that slime, ugh. The bottom edge of the shower divider wall thing in our rental apartment leaks and gets under the litterbox, which is situated between said divider and the toilet. We mitigate the situation and trap extra litter with a dedicated fluffy bathmat underneath that we dust-buster of loose litter as needed and chuck into the washing machine when it gets gross. Less litter slime gets on the floor tiles, so less of a hassle to clean. (Still a PITA though.)

                      That being said, if the water getting to your litter is from their water bowl, don't keep their (food and) water bowls near their litterbox, and this actually first and foremost for hygienic reasons.

                      (Unless you've got a quarantine-in-the-bathroom-type situation going on, in which case do what you gotta do.)

                      Thank you for fostering. <3

                      [–][deleted]  (14 children)


                        [–]MrRobotsBitch 58 points59 points  (9 children)

                        Ive managed to step on these pointy side up twice in my life. The absolute worst pain. Im having flashbacks.

                        [–]Bacon_Hero 16 points17 points  (8 children)

                        Worse than a Lego?

                        [–]xander_man 16 points17 points  (6 children)

                        I've stepped on both and survived both times. Legos are definitely worse.

                        [–]TheBestBigAl 15 points16 points  (2 children)

                        How about a UK plug?

                        Those fuckers always lie pin side up.

                        [–]Tindale 8 points9 points  (1 child)

                        Barbie high heels even worse.

                        [–]tommydadog 3 points4 points  (0 children)

                        toothpick embedded in carpet? worst than lego, ya know it hurts when you have to pull half a toothpick out of your foot....

                        [–]CollectableRat 49 points50 points  (1 child)

                        Yeah I think the spikes are to stop it from slipping on the carpet.

                        [–]hatetickles 27 points28 points  (0 children)

                        They are down

                        [–]Schnauzerbutt 57 points58 points  (0 children)

                        How to take care of carpeting.

                        Step one: throw it in the trash

                        [–]PlaviVal 139 points140 points  (6 children)

                        2? I counted at least 48 and the video is still going.

                        [–]dethmaul 9 points10 points  (3 children)

                        Well, youcame down here to comment. Now you have to start all over at one.

                        [–]PlaviVal 6 points7 points  (2 children)

                        DAMN IT. I've come back to read your comment at 78322 and you sir are absolutely correct.


                        [–]Wulfram77 21 points22 points  (1 child)

                        You didn't really put it on the racing line, they're just going wide to carry more speed.

                        [–]Audibledogfarts 22 points23 points  (0 children)

                        Dogs grip the floor with their nails. They won’t get traction on it so they avoid it.

                        [–]FartMartin 19 points20 points  (4 children)

                        LOL. Try putting towels on top of the plastic runners so their feeties are on something familiar.

                        [–]the_undad_10 46 points47 points  (1 child)

                        Then put carpet on top of the towels so their feeties are on something really familiar.

                        [–]FartMartin 7 points8 points  (0 children)

                        There you go.

                        [–]bannedprincessny 6 points7 points  (1 child)

                        towels would just slide right off. if your gonna use towels just put them on the carpet.

                        [–]FartMartin 4 points5 points  (0 children)

                        Yes, I think that's your best bet, although a bedspread or blanket might work better to cover the area or you'll be readjusting the towels frequently.

                        [–]smolfloofyredhead 24 points25 points  (3 children)

                        They probably don't like how it feels, plus they probably get horrible traction on it.

                        [–]spacex_fanny 7 points8 points  (1 child)

                        Amazed I had to read this far down to find the right explanation.

                        also agree with /u/Wulfram77's post and /u/Audibledogfarts' comment. Dogs are trying to conserve speed, time, and energy! And like us, they don't like to slip.

                        edit: /u/nomangm, lay down a rough rug between the towel and the filing cabinet, giving the dogs something to grip in the turn. Also, the dogs will keep on the plastic runner better if it's aimed slightly to the left of the door, rather than aimed straight at the middle of the doorway. Yes the shortest distance is a straight line, but neither humans nor dogs can turn on a dime (or rather, we usually don't want to).

                        [–]basshead541 20 points21 points  (0 children)

                        Not today hooman

                        [–]Giggity4242 9 points10 points  (0 children)

                        My dog kept slipping on my wooden stairs, so I installed carpet pads that take up the middle 2/3 of the stair. She walks on the small exposed wood part and still slips.

                        [–]spazzymcgee918 8 points9 points  (0 children)

                        At this point why have carpet? Putting plastic floors on top of your floors...

                        [–]Yisevery1nuts 6 points7 points  (0 children)

                        Assclowns. I’m dying. 😆

                        [–]getin_son 5 points6 points  (1 child)

                        Never understood covering your carpet with something ugly to "save it" from being ruined...

                        [–]Izwe 17 points18 points  (1 child)

                        The runners look worse than a muddy carpet

                        [–]CharredOldOakCask 68 points69 points  (33 children)

                        I've never understood Americans' insistence on wall-to-wall carpets.

                        It just seems so dirty. Just thinking about how much filth can accumulate on a hardwood floor throughout the week, and knowing it just sinks into those carpets, gives me the shivers. And to clean it you literally need something called a carpet shampoo, and a special machine to actually get it clean. Nope. Nope. Nope. Not worth it. I'll stick to my fuzzy slippers, and my scandinavian hardwood flooring.

                        [–]neryen 50 points51 points  (12 children)

                        As an American.. fuck carpet.

                        I have thrown out so much stinky gross carpet when renovating houses. I refuse to put carpet in any place I am going to live. I would rather pull it out and even just have a laminated floor over carpet.

                        Last time I dealt with carpet it was in a kitchen... and they laid carpet on top of the old carpet, so there were two layers of the stuff.

                        [–]skitech 56 points57 points  (7 children)

                        Why would anyone put carpet in a kitchen? That sounds about as good an idea as putting it in a bathroom.

                        [–]giandrea 36 points37 points  (3 children)

                        Which used to be a thing in Britain...

                        [–]skitech 19 points20 points  (2 children)

                        Seriously? That has got to be the most disgusting thing. Like I have some rugs in my bathroom, but they are small and I can pick them up and wash them or throw them out.

                        [–]splashbodge 15 points16 points  (0 children)

                        Yeh ireland too... my old house as a kid had carpet in the bathroom... It's gross

                        Only nice thing about it was the floor was nice and warm in the cold mornings barefoot

                        Now kitchens and bathrooms are typically tiled and usually wooden floors in all rooms ... maybe carpet in bedrooms

                        [–]spazzymcgee918 2 points3 points  (0 children)

                        Just started watching the show fixer upper. A surprising amount of houses built ~100 years ago have carpeted steps leading up to the bathtub. How is that smart???

                        [–]MidnightExcursion 6 points7 points  (0 children)

                        As an American, the 30 year old carpet in one of the bathrooms is admittedly kind of gross.

                        [–]Selfdestructseq0001 5 points6 points  (1 child)

                        Try small 6 by 6 feet carpers which can be cleaned and only put them at strategic locations where you walk barefoot.

                        [–]yupdannym88 26 points27 points  (11 children)

                        Not from US and I love wooden floors; we have wooden floors throughout the house.

                        There are good reasons for carpets. It isn't slippery, a child won't be as hurt if they fall and hit their head, it is cleaner to the eye, you can sit on the floor without discomfort, it protects the wooden floor underneath, doesn't scratch, easy to change the look by changing carpets... feel like I could go on for a while.

                        I wouldn't give up my wooden floors, and I agree with carpets being dirty, but I'd be lying if I said I didn't miss a carpet to sit on (I like sitting on the floor) or how they aren't cold to touch.

                        [–]xander_man 19 points20 points  (2 children)

                        I have hardwood throughout my house, but when i have kids and finish the basement to make a play area for them it'll be wall to wall carpet down there. Another feature: sound absorption

                        [–]CharredOldOakCask 7 points8 points  (4 children)

                        protects the wooden floor underneath

                        Are you thinking about just normal carpets? I wouldn't expect wall-to-wall carpets protected the floors. Aren't wall-to-wall carpets attached to the floor with adhesives of some kind? I'd imagine that would ruin whatever hardwood you have underneath. No?

                        [–]yupdannym88 11 points12 points  (2 children)

                        My bad, I don't know much about carpets. The ones we have here (RSA) are mostly bonded to the wall with nails and wood. It's a big thing here to rip carpets off to reveal a wonderful wooden floor that just needs a bit of work.

                        Edit: our houses are all brick n mortar

                        [–]spazzymcgee918 5 points6 points  (0 children)

                        I really wish carpet were not the default in apartments here. Accumulated stains from who knows how many residents. Even freshly vacuumed they never look nice and clean. You will never have a nice apartment if you at best have unidentified spots covering the floors. And that's just what you can see. And sweeping/mopping is just easier, more effective. I cant buy a dyson but I can buy a five dollar broom.

                        [–]berlinflieger 11 points12 points  (2 children)

                        You can clean their paws at the door. Just like you normally take off your shoes. Can't expect them to do it for you 😐

                        [–]ittakesaredditor 2 points3 points  (0 children)

                        Had GSD, can confirm. Just copious treats and lots of praise. They'll whine and fuss initially but adapt.

                        [–]Selfdestructseq0001 3 points4 points  (0 children)

                        Because it is slippery

                        [–]PM_UR_DEAD_HOOKERS 4 points5 points  (0 children)

                        It's slippery when their paws are wet, and claws don't make it any easier. Try a different material like an actual rug.

                        [–]obamayang420 3 points4 points  (0 children)

                        I know that my dog (german shepherd) is terrified of linoleum the linoleum flooring in the mudroom of our house because it's so slippery and she can't run through it without falling over

                        [–]socsa 3 points4 points  (0 children)

                        Even your dogs think thats tacky af

                        [–]PoopAtBuzzardBeach 5 points6 points  (0 children)

                        ur carpet is like nana's couch bro

                        [–]DoubleHandsDan 2 points3 points  (0 children)

                        Dogs have an innate ability to always choose the most efficient surface to walk and run on.

                        [–]pablobunny 2 points3 points  (0 children)

                        Sometimes i like to flip those and walk on it and see if i can make it to the other side, after i use legos

                        [–]DjStevo6450 2 points3 points  (0 children)

                        You should make longer gif with the mat moved into the position of the dogs last line they walked, multiple times.

                        [–]vadapaav 2 points3 points  (0 children)

                        So how many dogs do you have? I have counted 32 till now

                        [–]Himalaysian 2 points3 points  (0 children)

                        I had to stop watching after the 20th dog. You need counseling.

                        [–]Ifop 2 points3 points  (0 children)

                        best use of the word assclown