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[–]UncleSkippy[M] [score hidden] stickied comment (0 children)

Threads like this one make my mouse scream out in terror. So many comments removed. So much clicking.

So much.

Please stay on topic people.

[–]swhat_ 195 points196 points  (6 children)

[–]Derdirtywristocker 8 points9 points  (3 children)

I almost didn't see what the joke was because of the distractions.

[–]Monteze 8 points9 points  (2 children)

Boobs? Its boobs right?

[–]optimates 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Watch the display.

[–]Derdirtywristocker 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Two of them to be exact. How did you guess?

[–]Nodeal_reddit 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Yours is way funnier.

[–]ApiaryJJ[S] 225 points226 points  (94 children)

Seeing down votes, so a bit of context. Dern has a history of missing weight. Yesterday, she missed weight by 7.4# for tonight's UFC fight. That's a lot for any weight class; it's worse when you consider she fights in the 115 class. She has been heavily hyped by the UFC and then recently stated she spends time on the beach when her coaches wanted her in the gym training.

She endorses a scale on her IG 2 days before missing weight by a mile.

Irony = funny

[–]rvvbjj 15 points16 points  (3 children)

Thank you for the context, I didnt know that!

[–]catatonic 2 points3 points  (1 child)

I don't get it, please explain further.

[–]9inety9ine 12 points13 points  (0 children)

She promoted that scale on her insta, then missed weight for UFC 224 by over 7 pounds about 2 days later.

[–]EisForElbowsmashHokuto Shinken/BJJ/But I repeat Myself 99 points100 points  (11 children)

So OP posts a bit of fun and irony, which was worth a giggle, but then yallrcunts, shows up to give what appears to be a masterclass in tremendous trolling pressure. Then it turns out that not only is he being serious but is probably wearing his pants on his head.

Not only does he step in to defend m'lady's 7.5 lbs, without realizing there is no way Mackenzie Dern will either read this thread or polish his knob (sorry to be the bearer of bad news dude), but he does it by complaining about the "unique physiological and social pressures women face" while ignoring the fact that other women in MMA (and many other sports), including her opponent (and herself in the past) make weight regularly.

The fact is, she's too chubby for her weight class and has all but admitted she'd rather hang out on the beach than train, which is fine for her, but it does make it unintentionally hilarious when she's endorsing a scale, and ridiculous outrage by a white knight on reddit only makes it twice as funny.

[–]Derdirtywristocker 12 points13 points  (0 children)

...there is no way Mackenzie Dern will either read this thread or polish his knob

So you're saying there's not a chance?

[–]JFMX1996 16 points17 points  (4 children)

I hate white knights with a passion. There's so many on this sub too, haha.

Anyway, trying to defend her is a lost cause, especially with all the reasons you stated. If her opponents can make weight, she can too. If not, then that weight class is way too low for her. This girl looks like she's naturally around 140 lbs.

[–]HrtzyTJJK 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I usually have a knee-jerk rejection of any opinion that comes with a side order of accusing the opposition of being white knights, but this once I'm forced to agree; not only are the unique pressures women face geared towards being skinnier, but the fact is that Dern accepted two years' pay just to show up as a straw-weight and didn't deliver.

[–]NeonNachos:White-Belt: 3 points4 points  (0 children)

It's kinda unfortunate that she absolutely starched. Cooper. This could have been her come to Jesus moment.

[–]PM_ME_UR_BJJ 3 points4 points  (1 child)

Nuked by mods and lost. Am disappoint.

[–]EisForElbowsmashHokuto Shinken/BJJ/But I repeat Myself 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You missed an amusing shitshow, that's for sure.

[–]SamSamBjj 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I got to it late, but can see all of his side on his history. It's amazing.

Particularly the AAA example of Nice Guy™ white knighting, where he lets slip his true belief that all women are actually filthy cheating whores:

Women are built to create humans. Men are designed to impregnate them. This has lead to sexual warfare for millions of years yielding cuckoldry, and all sorts of underhanded strategies for procreation and securing their progeny's destiny.

[–]fortzen1305Gustavo Dantas 31 points32 points  (0 children)

I wonder if all the Vitagoods scales are off by 7.5 lbs.

[–]ApiaryJJ[S] 34 points35 points  (0 children)

I wanted to leave a comment on her IG post to thank her for the recommendation, but comments are turned off😀 What an endorsement! /s

[–]ribeyeIsGood 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I was expecting it to read -8lbs

[–]BrutalJones 9 points10 points  (1 child)

Absolutch unitch

[–]sjeffiesjeff 1 point2 points  (0 children)

In awe of the size of her ass

[–]MuonManLaserJab 23 points24 points  (60 children)

/u/yallrcunts, thanks for making this thread hilarious. You are the real MVP. You're the #1 troll on /r/bjj, hands down.

[–]Csardonic1 6 points7 points  (0 children)

:( I got here too late for the funnies

[–]fortzen1305Gustavo Dantas 3 points4 points  (1 child)

Paging /u/nickbow . I wish he would come back.

[–]rand486www.grapplegearstore.com 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm not the only one?! I thought he'd faded from /r/bjj memory, thanks to some WHITE BELT BULLSHIT!

[–]PajamaDuelistPineapple Express 1 point2 points  (2 children)

Dude could put out paid tutorials on trolling and I'd buy 'em. GOAT troll contender for sure

[–]MuonManLaserJab 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Greatest Of All Trolls

[–]danjitsu91 1 point2 points  (0 children)

dammit, I'm late to the party. I love a good troll thread. Any links to /u/nickbow greatest hits?

[–]OriginalWhiteJesus 22 points23 points  (2 children)

Stopped by my gym for a publicity thing. She was looking thick. And when I say that I don't mean T H I C C. I mean fat. Certainly by pro fighter standards, but also my personal standards by which women's health is judged.

Reminds me of one of our fighters who missed weight 7 times in a row, but fatter.

[–]MokiBoy 17 points18 points  (1 child)

Seen her around several times in the last few months. She used to drop in at my academy as well.

At one BJJ tournament in Irvine, seen her eating a huge dessert bowl (not acai) and my girl says “oooh! That’s Mackenzie’s weakness! Sweets! Just like me!”

Ever since then, I just figured Mackenzie’s eating sweets.

She was looking really chunky at that tournament though, one would never guess she’s a fighter in contact with UFC.

[–]OutsiderHALL 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I was watching that UFC vlog or something, and thinking to myself man she looks really thick. and when she said something like "oh we just landed, and we are going to the hotel and start weight cutting" I was like seriously?

[–]HockeyDadNinjaRobson Moura 4 points5 points  (1 child)

As soon as I saw that scale this is what I was reminded of: (sorry this is the only place I could find the vid)

http://mmaimports.com/2017/11/ufcs-andre-fili-exposes-non-paying-sponsor-destroys-equipment-smile-new-viral-call/

Anyone else?

[–]teamshred 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Rare feet.

[–]DaveBoyOhBoy 5 points6 points  (0 children)

10/10 can still sit on my face

[–]VoiceofPrometheus 2 points3 points  (5 children)

Some time ago a UFC fighter made a post saying he didn't get paid the promised money for promoting the scale. He made a vid of him throwing it in the bin after that. Also the product seems like bullshit, how would a scale know how much of your weight is muscle, water, fat, etc?

[–]Hadron90 6 points7 points  (4 children)

By passing an electric current through and measuring the resistance. It isnt as accurate as other measures, but I isnt terrible either.

[–]absolute_panic 0 points1 point  (3 children)

Resistance is a lot of cumulative factors though. Yes, it’s muscle %, fat %, water%, but it’s also bone density, skin permeability (calluses on feet), the inverse of blood conductivity (iron content), etc. A 5 microamp current (or whatever value it is) can’t tell the difference of what’s what. That’s too complicated of a task.

[–]Hadron90 2 points3 points  (2 children)

So it isnt so useful for determining absolute bf%, but it works pretty well for seeing your changes and progress.

[–]ThatHandsomeDude 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Good cause my scale told me I have too much fat

[–]NoSeafoodAllowed 4 points5 points  (0 children)

She said she tried really hard to make weight. She came in looking thicc (as ever) and chubby. Come on girl, there's no way in hell you tried your hardest. Everything about you and your behavior leading up to the fight was lackadaisical. It's a shame because she has so much potential and I definitely am a fan, but she needs to take this shit seriously. Move up a weight class or SOMETHING

[–]Spenundrum 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If she forgot how to speak English, then of course she forgot how to use a scale.

[–]practicalguy 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Dang. Dem titties.

[–]mattmonster25 3 points4 points  (9 children)

god i cant wait till she fights a girl to punch her face in shes gotta be the fakest weirdest person in jiu jitsu

[–]Mtaar2 2 points3 points  (8 children)

aaaaand it didnt happen

[–]mattmonster25 0 points1 point  (7 children)

cause she fought a bum lol she wont even get into top 5 she missed weight by 7 pounds trying hard to avoid 125

[–]Mtaar2 0 points1 point  (6 children)

all I care is trash talker was defeated))

[–]mattmonster25 0 points1 point  (5 children)

and all i care for is the stupid autistic girl poser gets koed and has no ufc career

[–]lohkeytx 0 points1 point  (4 children)

you seem pretty passionate about someone you've never met.

And autistic? grow up. Hopefully you're more articulate than that childish insult.

[–]mattmonster25 0 points1 point  (3 children)

she is very autistic u can tell by how she speaks when someone acts like a pos they deserve to be treated like a pos to miss weight by 7 pounds then not seem to care and make jokes about it shows a total lack of respect she is lucky womens mma is at a very low level right now until she fights ranked people as soon as she fights a girl who can whizzer underhooks ect shes gonna get smashed

[–]lohkeytx 0 points1 point  (2 children)

she doesn't act like a pos.

you are basically acting like a pos.

grow up.

[–]mattmonster25 0 points1 point  (1 child)

lol i bet your really the life of the party at your gym arnt you

[–]lohkeytx 0 points1 point  (0 children)

if you're implying i don't act like a child? then yes. I do not act like a child that flings around ridiculous insults for no reason.

[–]DieselGrappler 1 point2 points  (1 child)

My God she's a beautiful woman...

[–]lohkeytx 1 point2 points  (0 children)

i know right

[–]Bandaka -1 points0 points  (1 child)

Fighters miss weight, shit happens

[–]General_Marcus 4 points5 points  (0 children)

7 lbs over at 115? That's ridiculous.

[–]peelout498 -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

What is r/bjj's opinion on the MacKenzie dern situation? Is the bjj community supportive of her?