top 200 commentsshow 500

[–]HanabinoOto 254 points255 points  (13 children)

Cows need to have babies to produce milk.

[–]LickingTheLimeLight 42 points43 points  (0 children)

A pastry chef told me this once. I felt like that stoner meme

[–]Maebyfunke37 39 points40 points  (1 child)

Most milk comes from artificially impregnating a cow and then taking the calf away immediately or shortly after birth so the milk her body makes for her baby can go to the grocery store instead.

[–]rsqejfwflqkj 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Also fuels the whole veal industry...

[–]Meritania 9 points10 points  (1 child)

I learnt this at a dairy farm, I also learnt the life expectancy of male cattle isn't too long

[–]MrTattersTheClown 724 points725 points  (53 children)

That Blue from Blue's Clues is a girl. In hindsight, Steve used female pronouns all the time but my child brain associated the color blue with boys.

[–]iCapn 124 points125 points  (11 children)

Wasn't there a pink "Blue" as well?

[–]4drewdug 208 points209 points  (10 children)

You mean Magenta?

[–]Flick1981 61 points62 points  (5 children)

On this same page, I thought Nermal was a girl.

[–]Murphman82 39 points40 points  (3 children)

Wait, Nermals not a girl? That can't be right...googled it and your right, WTF? He's smaller and has those huge eyelashes, learned something new tonight.

[–]kinda_bored 100 points101 points  (3 children)

I thought paprika was just salt and pepper mixed together until age 23.

[–]Pince1357 23 points24 points  (10 children)

On the other side, my sister always thought Jerry from Tom and Jerry was a girl. There was an argument that ended with a google.

[–]MyDogLikesTottenham 1122 points1123 points  (32 children)

Just because someone is mad at you, doesn’t mean you did anything wrong

[–]SgWaterQn 181 points182 points  (18 children)

Where is my FREAKING phone!

[–]darkhumourveil 69 points70 points  (12 children)

Is that an Andy punching the wall reference? Because The Return is my favourite episode

[–]LETSTRADE_NUDES 25 points26 points  (0 children)

I'm gonna lose my FREAKING MIND!

[–]wheregoodideasgotodi 34 points35 points  (4 children)

Truth. My fiancee works nights so she comes home while I'm still asleep. One day she came home and fell down the stairs to our bedroom, i immediately hopped out of bed to see if she was ok and she started yelling at me to get the fuck away from her. I was super confused.

[–]DaemonAfterdark 490 points491 points  (37 children)

I had poor vision until 10th grade. Never crossed my mind it could be better until my teacher noticed I was squinting too hard to see the board.

[–]FireflyRave 152 points153 points  (12 children)

I'm not sure that's exactly obvious when you've never had the ability to view the world any different. I never knew I needed glasses until I took the eye exam to get my driving permit at 15.

[–]Swede_Sprout 39 points40 points  (0 children)

My nearsightedness took years to manifest, and I mostly didn't notice. What little I did notice, I was in denial of.

[–]seinfeld11 19 points20 points  (0 children)

I went home after finally getting my glasses at 14 generalize why my mom kept whining about my lazy cleaning. I didn't know what dust looked like, I thought every mom made it up or something! I even remember how filthy and fingerprinted my Windows were lol

[–]CrabbyBlueberry 46 points47 points  (1 child)

You mean it's not me noggin it's me peepers?

[–]friednazi 15 points16 points  (0 children)

My programming teacher pointed out that I was squinting to read the code being projected. I got glasses and now contacts and I never would have even known I had eyesight issues without that comment.

[–]LeadFarmerMothaFucka 14 points15 points  (0 children)

This is me in 4th grade. Schools gave free checkups every year and I failed every single one. And somehow the school never once notified my parents. I'm legally blind in my left eye and only until my mother asked why I was reading with no left eye closed was it discovered. Why the fuck would you have free checkups if you don't notify the parents that the kid failed...?

[–]please_is_magic 8 points9 points  (3 children)

When my boss got her son glasses one of the first things he said was "wow look mama did you know leaves had lines on them?" You don't know what you're missing til you aren't missing it anymore.

[–]Quaddy_Thighman 172 points173 points  (14 children)

I never realized until I was in college that the song I thought was Secret Asian Man was actually saying Secret Agent Man. 🤦🏼‍♀️

[–]hometowngypsy 412 points413 points  (9 children)

My dad was not afraid of rodents. He just told me that to get out of going to Chuck E Cheese (whose mascot was a giant mouse.) I didn’t figure it out until my cousins, the daughters of my dad’s identical twin, said their dad had lied about the same thing. I was about 17.

[–]PixelPantsAshli 46 points47 points  (1 child)

Maybe Chuck wasn't the rodent he was afraid of, he knew better than to eat their pizza!

[–]Whammo___ 9 points10 points  (3 children)

If he wasn't afraid of rodents, why would he use that excuse to get out of going there?

Am I being dumb and missing something here?

[–]tabladav 19 points20 points  (1 child)

You're not being dumb. Their dad lied claiming he was afraid of rodents. They realized later that he wasn't and was just using his lie to get out of going to Chuck E Cheese.

[–]CindyGibson 144 points145 points  (8 children)

That Diagon Alley was really diagonally. And Knockturn Alley was nocturnally. About two years ago, I was sitting in The Wizarding World Of Harry Potter having butter beer ice cream and finally figured it out.

[–]Irishwoman94 80 points81 points  (0 children)

Grimmauld Place was actually Grim Old Place. That's what I love about JK Rowlings use of names. Some are in depth, really thought out with historical or mythical connections. Others are Grim Old Place where Black Dog and Werewolf McWerewolf spent their time

[–]RQK1996 13 points14 points  (0 children)

tbf they 'spell' it out in the second movie, and no double pun was not intended, just didn't know a better word to use

[–]Ben77777[S] 1436 points1437 points  (70 children)

The division symbol is an empty fraction

[–]therealkingwack 321 points322 points  (9 children)

HOLY SHIT WHAT THE HECK. These realizations are what keeps me going even through my darkest days.

[–]marypoppinsanaldwarf 72 points73 points  (0 children)

Fuck dude. How the fuck.

[–]wizardent420 69 points70 points  (4 children)

... Man I gotta get off reddit. This shits heavy

[–]fastertempo 26 points27 points  (2 children)

Is there a problem with the earth's gravitational pull?

[–]w3woody 145 points146 points  (0 children)

Mind. Blown.

[–]PM_ME_UR_UGLY_FACE 65 points66 points  (0 children)

I have my minor in math. Holy hell... you just blew my mind harder than anything.

[–]Screboog 58 points59 points  (3 children)

Jesus Christ I have a master's in math and this just blew my mind.

[–]RadleyCunningham 27 points28 points  (0 children)

Now you can get your black belt in math!

[–]RoguePoet 147 points148 points  (8 children)

And the Percent sign is an empty Percentage. %

[–]icyangel2666 28 points29 points  (2 children)

I'm laughing at these people flipping out.

[–]SilentEngineer 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I had a teacher point that out. Never would have seen it otherwise.

[–]slicespeaches 230 points231 points  (14 children)

That “XING” stands for “crossing”

[–]beijingcowsgomurr 350 points351 points  (4 children)

I’m Chinese and this confused me so much when I was a kid. “Who is Ped Xing and why are so many signs named after him?”

[–]HarthDerp 113 points114 points  (1 child)

Side note, you’ve got a hilarious username.

[–]pm_me_gold_plz 20 points21 points  (0 children)

Haha. It's true! I asked my Beijing friend what cows say and she said "murr."

[–]SalaComMander 26 points27 points  (0 children)

Actually, the signs are there to warn of the headless Xing Tian wanting to fight people with an axe. They put the lines on the road so cars could stop and give people room to run away.

[–]silphred43 9 points10 points  (5 children)

When I figured that one out I started wondering why Christmas is sometimes shortened to "X-mas".

[–]NormGreen 12 points13 points  (3 children)

That one is because X comes from the Greek letter Chi which is the first letter of Christ in Greek.

[–]Beecakeband 528 points529 points  (29 children)

This little piggy went to Market. I always thought he was going to the supermarket it only clicked a couple of years ago where he was really going. I'm 26

[–]GizM050 174 points175 points  (4 children)

Nooo! This jus broke my heart at 32

[–]heidisatwork 39 points40 points  (2 children)

NOOOOO How did I not know this was about the slaughter of pigs? My childhood has been ruined. Now I cannot even do that with my grandchildren without thinking of that....

[–]Beecakeband 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Same reaction haha. I was gobsmacked when I figured it out

[–]blockhose 41 points42 points  (5 children)

I dunno - that little piggy going to market, as in to be sold by a butcher, isn’t consistent with what the other piggies were up to.

[–]Skulldo 72 points73 points  (4 children)

It is apparently a whole instruction manual on how to manage a pig farm.

Market- going to market

Stayed at home - breeding stock

Eating roast beef - getting fattened

Ate none- apparently you don't feed pigs for a bit before they go to slaughter

Wee wee wee one - just a fun loving pig that likes tickling children and is happy to not be next in line for the chop.

[–]limeyptwo 15 points16 points  (1 child)

Well, he DID go to the supermarket.

[–]--Doom-- 521 points522 points  (15 children)

Not me, but one of my friends only realised that the word alphabet is from the Greek letters alpha and beta, a couple of years ago.

[–]AnonymouslyCurious1 111 points112 points  (0 children)

Well i didn't know that until right now. Shit.

[–]Ben77777[S] 96 points97 points  (0 children)

I felt this one

[–]biggsteve81 47 points48 points  (3 children)

Yep. It's the Greek version of saying "ABCs"

[–]dusk27 160 points161 points  (8 children)

When I was a kid and saw a movie trailer and it said “Coming this August 27 ONLY IN THEATERS” I thought it meant it wouldn’t be released to VHS at a later date and I HAD to see it or else I never will

[–]operarose 41 points42 points  (1 child)

So I'm not the only one! I remember saying out loud once after seeing that at the end of a trailer, "darn, and that one looks really good! Shame it won't ever come out on tape."

I was a dull child.

[–]Maweedug 198 points199 points  (7 children)

Not everyone has your best interests at heart.

[–]janniceinaccounting 111 points112 points  (6 children)

Not everyone has their own best interests at heart. Some people are just fucking random

[–]onetwo3four5 36 points37 points  (2 children)

I would say they have their own best interest at heart, they just don't have it at brain. People are not good at figuring out what will make them happy.

[–]SunsetDreams1111 243 points244 points  (24 children)

When used as a noun:

Blonde - female Blond - male

[–]libertarianlove 53 points54 points  (1 child)

Damn. 45 years old and I still get at least one TIL daily on Reddit.

[–]TheNerdWithNoName 121 points122 points  (6 children)

Fiancée is female.

Fiancé is male.

[–]Elly2014 55 points56 points  (6 children)

When I was a kid, my mom used to encourage us to eat carrots by saying it would give us better eyesight. She joked that you never see a rabbit wearing glasses on. Since I was a kid, I thought, "That is true! So she must be right!"

It took me a while to realize that she was making a joke and it was dumb to think that any animal would even be wearing glasses.

[–]TheNerdWithNoName 32 points33 points  (3 children)

It started as allied propaganda during WW2 to cover up the fact that they had radar to locate enemy planes.

[–]solarsavior 153 points154 points  (3 children)

To stop kicking my own ass. Continuing to be upset about an event was just ME causing ME grief, so stop it.

I realized this after being pulled over by a cop for what I believed was a bullshit reason. I only got a warning and the cop went on his way, but I was pissed off. It finally dawned on me that the cop had went on with his day and probably wasn't giving me another thought. Thus at this point I was the one causing me grief and not the cop. No amount of me fussing was going to change the cop's mind.

[–]anoanohajimemashite 226 points227 points  (16 children)

Bruises are internal bleeding. I don’t know what I thought they were before I knew that.

[–]fastertempo 247 points248 points  (14 children)

Interal bleeding is a good thing right? That's where blood is supposed to be.

[–]chillzap21 27 points28 points  (2 children)

Is that a reference to Brooklyn 99? Apologies if it isn't

[–]youtocin 41 points42 points  (0 children)

Well kind of, it's subdermal bleeding. Internal bleeding usually refers to organs bleeding into your body cavity.

[–]pdxcranberry 144 points145 points  (8 children)

They’re called soft drinks because they don’t contain hard alcohol

[–]honey-bees-knees 24 points25 points  (6 children)

Fun fact: early sodas were alcoholic because they relied on yeast to provide the carbonation

[–]spirito_santo 12 points13 points  (2 children)

Technically not true (which Reddit knows is the best kind of not true) since the name soda implies that the beverage was carbonated using sodium salts.

Early bubbly drinks, however .....

[–]klsi832 409 points410 points  (34 children)

Sitcom is short for situation comedy.

[–]CrabbyBlueberry 95 points96 points  (4 children)

I used to think it was because you watched TV while sitting down.

[–]ObsceneTurnip 132 points133 points  (7 children)

In Missy Elliot's song "Work It", the seemingly nonsense gibberish after the "I put my thing down, flip it and reverse it" is in fact "Ti esrever dna ti pilf nwod gniht ym tup I", the previous lyric, reversed.

[–]AlabasterStar 24 points25 points  (0 children)

I didn't know that either til you just posted it now.

[–]mouse-chauffeur 69 points70 points  (11 children)

The D in the Disney logo is not a backwards G

[–]ChiiBerry 41 points42 points  (5 children)

My bf pronounces it Gisney sometimes. Wouldn't be so bad if he used a hard G instead of a J sound... 😓

[–]RedditPoster05 32 points33 points  (5 children)

Cupertino is a place not just Apple trying to be cool.

[–]RndmRanger 41 points42 points  (4 children)

Just because someone's telling you want their problem, doesn't mean they expect or even want you to fix it.

[–]Ariadnepyanfar 14 points15 points  (1 child)

They need to vent, or to have some validation that they are seen as a person, and that they are going through some shit right now.

[–]SweetBakchich 38 points39 points  (1 child)

Beyoncé’s long and full blond hair being a weave.

When I grew up (the 2000s in France, but not Paris), all black women around me had relaxed hair. Weave was not really a thing there back then. So when I saw Beyoncé as a teenager on TV, with her full, blond, straight and bouncy hair, I assumed that it was her real hair, and she just had an army of stylists at her service and amazing products that allowed her to grow long and healthy hair, while still relaxing AND coloring it (normally, chemical relaxers and chemical coloring together lead to disaster, hair not growing, split ends, hair thinning, etc.). I just didn’t know you could sew someone else’s hair to your cornrows to make it look like your own hair. And I was very jealous, because having long straight hair was all I wanted then. But much later I learned about weaves, and I figured out that Beyoncé’s hair was just that, and honestly I felt cheated. I felt as if teenager me had been actively lied to, by letting me believe her own hair was some kind of attainable goal. Thankfully I got over wanting non-black hair, and now I just rock my natural hair.

[–]MikeTheBig13 69 points70 points  (5 children)

I genuinely believed "elemeno" was a letter in the alphabet between "k" and "p"

[–]solarsavior 255 points256 points  (35 children)

It's called Chick-fil-A because it's a Chicken Filet. My daughter had to clue me in when I asked why it was called Chick-fil-A.

[–]klsi832 362 points363 points  (14 children)

Roast beef.



[–]afjeep 131 points132 points  (4 children)

Raffel Brothers, the founders.

[–]biscat 48 points49 points  (0 children)

Oh. My. God.

[–]not_better 30 points31 points  (1 child)

Sorry, false : wiki The brothers wanted to call their restaurants "Big Tex", but that name was already used by an Akron business. Instead, they chose the name "Arby's", based on R. B., the initials of Raffel Brothers.

[–]Jay_TThomas 230 points231 points  (12 children)

That its pay per view and not paper view

[–]TheGoddessChloe 46 points47 points  (8 children)

Holy shit, I thought it was paper view. Damn, I'm retarded...

[–]treegirl07 192 points193 points  (31 children)

That people can be mean. Seriously, for most of my life I thought that people were naturally good and sometimes were mean because they were having a bad day, not because they were actually mean people. I'm 32 BTW, so yeah, I've just figured that one out.

[–]Lurrhurrdurr 38 points39 points  (2 children)

I’m 16, experienced an expensive lesson several months ago, and couldn’t believe how I hadn’t realised it

[–]daicalun07 11 points12 points  (1 child)

And it’s funny how reddit is enforcing that “people is most likely to have a bad day” mindset to encourage others to stop worrying.

There are mean and shitty people, it’s just that you should know to not letting them occupy your mind while staying alert to those types.

[–]Kazooglekoogle 80 points81 points  (16 children)

The French word for good is bon, the word for day is jour. So bonjour literally translates to good day. Took my 3 years of French classes to notice.

[–]_Mephostopheles_ 164 points165 points  (3 children)

Similarly, "bonsoir" means good evening, "bonne nuit" means good night, and "Bon Jovi" means good times.

EDIT: made the comment better

[–]danglingparticiples 124 points125 points  (13 children)

Elevators ding once for going up, twice for going down for blind people.

[–]SunshinePumpkin 45 points46 points  (7 children)

I've never even noticed this. Do they all do it?

[–]LillyEpstein 26 points27 points  (3 children)

Gloria Estefan is one person, Its not Gloria & Stefan.

[–]PixelPantsAshli 129 points130 points  (11 children)

Quesadilla = queso + tortilla

[–]suddenly_ninja 335 points336 points  (17 children)

When people find something and say the phrase, "It's always in the last place you look" it means that since you found the lost thing, you wouldn't keep looking. I realized this when my friend lost his car keys, and we looked everywhere. Finally, on a whim, I ask him to check the trunk of his car, since that's where he puts his groceries and he might have dropped his keys when taking the groceries out. Sure enough, he popped it open, and was immediately decapitated by a shinobi from a rival clan. I always thought it meant that it was "the last place you think to look", and people just shortened the expression.

[–]SubMana 78 points79 points  (0 children)

hol' up a sec...

[–]thelastmanticore 23 points24 points  (0 children)

This is my new favorite novelty account.

[–]bethisntaken 21 points22 points  (0 children)

That volleyball isn’t ‘ball-e-ball’.

[–]WalterFlanagansDog 84 points85 points  (33 children)

That mince pies aren’t actually made with mince meat.

Always thought they were made with mince meat, never understood why people ate them cold. Whenever anyone asked if I wanted one, I’d always say “no thank you, I don’t like them”, and left it at that.

I only found out they weren’t made with mince meat about 7 years ago at work when a colleague asked if I wanted one, but then asked why when I said I didn’t like them.

I’m 35.

[–]Reinventing_Wheels 60 points61 points  (17 children)

ELIA (Explain Like I'm American)

Then what is a mince pie?

[–]mapleandvanilla 44 points45 points  (2 children)

Mini pie/tart filled with a sort of jammy mix of dried fruit and warm spices.

[–]Drew707 9 points10 points  (1 child)

I'd rather have a cold version of what I thought it was.

[–]WartyWartyBottom 29 points30 points  (2 children)

It’s a sweet pie, filled with minced, spiced, dried fruit. Usually made with sultanas, currants, raisins and citrus peel, flavoured with nutmeg, cinnamon and brandy. There’s any number of variations, but that’s the basic idea.

[–]Kozmik786 19 points20 points  (1 child)

That Patric Star is so stupid because he lives under a rock...
I'm 22 and only just discovered this like two or three weeks ago.

[–]Crazygiraffeprincess 180 points181 points  (6 children)

Flo Rida (the rapper) if you put his name together it says Florida.

My favorite tho is City and Color. The artist's actual name is Dallas Green. Which is a city and a color.

[–]IaniteThePirate 103 points104 points  (13 children)

Y'know how the circumference of a circle is 2πr?

So to get the radius, you divide by 2π.

And to get the diameter, you multiply the radius by 2.


You could just divide by π.

I was literally dividing by 2 and then multiplying that by 2. This was in an engineering class. I may need to reconsider what I'm doing with my life.

[–]Bond4141 68 points69 points  (12 children)

Token Black from South park is named that because he's the Token Black Character.

I only noticed when they added Miss Conduct, and Strong Woman...

[–]12miceonmars 20 points21 points  (2 children)

My spouse isn't from the U.S. or a native English speaker. He watches a lot of South Park, but the show's not up my alley. Once I overheard an episode he was watching with Token (I'd never heard of this character before) and I started laughing, shaking my head "Token... nice..." and he was like huh? I had to explain what Token meant in this context and I love that I expanded his understanding of a show he'd been watching for years.

[–]SUCHajoke 17 points18 points  (3 children)

That Dustin Hoffman played Hook. I was in high school/college before I realized.

[–]crewchief535 75 points76 points  (8 children)

That Ozzy wasn't saying "I am Islandman".

[–]14kanthropologist 62 points63 points  (2 children)

I never understood why the Chik-fil-a marketing cows gave a shit about whether or not I ate chicken. I didn’t understand why the cows were constantly telling me to eat more chicken until I realized that they want me to eat more chicken.... because if I’m eating chicken.... I’m not eating cows. Very clever. Took me a long time to understand.

[–]Indrah1 21 points22 points  (1 child)

They didn't have chick fil a in Hawaii but still ran the commercials and when we moved to the mainland when my son was 11 he saw his first Chick fil a and he said excitedly "Mom look! It's eat more chicken!!"

[–]lannisterdwarf 15 points16 points  (0 children)

The Hard Rock Cafe was referring to a genre of music, not stones which were solid. The giant guitar tipped me off

[–]blablh 17 points18 points  (0 children)

That the under armour symbol is like a U on top of an A

[–]Saltwaterblood 92 points93 points  (9 children)

I thought it was Coldstone Crematory for the longest time. I thought it was odd that there was a chain of body-burning around town, but hey, whatever.

It wasn't until some guy asked if I wanted to go get some ice cream at Coldstone with him that I realized my mistake. My thought process literally was: He doesn't seem goth or disrespectful, so why would he want to eat ice cream at a Crematory? Is that even allowed? Would we bring the ice cream because crematories don't serv- OH. I GET IT NOW.

Edit: it may have been Marble Slab, actually. Either or.

[–]YellowRoseMoonchild 91 points92 points  (18 children)

Do you know how long it took me to realize there was a civil war going on in Skyrim? Like, six months. I didn't even understand most of what was going on in the main quest until much later. I was just too busy rampaging the countryside killing bandits and stealing their horses to pay attention to the lore.

[–]Azhaius 10 points11 points  (3 children)

Eh, more a fault on Bethesda than you. That's one of my criticisms of the game, people talk real big about this huge civil war going on and yet you never actually see any of it outside of the bland Imperial/Stormcloak quests.

[–]Jorden99 14 points15 points  (2 children)

Pickles are just cucumbers that have been pickled in vinegar. I thought they were there own vegetable.

[–]thekfish 39 points40 points  (2 children)

Mayor Pauline in New Donk City is who Donkey Kong kidnapped in his first arcade cabinet game. I'm about 700 moons in and just realized this a couple days ago.

[–]HermitDefenestration 9 points10 points  (0 children)

The festival should have tipped you off even if you didn't make the connection the first time you saw her.

[–]shutup_dennis 39 points40 points  (10 children)

That Kim Jong-Un's first name isn't Kim... It occurred to me around week ago. I feel really stupid.

[–]SunshinePumpkin 16 points17 points  (0 children)

I only knew because there was a Korean girl in my sister's class in elementary and her last name (first) was Kim and it had to be explained to everyone.

[–]ALittleOwlPal 13 points14 points  (5 children)

That pineapples do not grow like apples, pears, etc. and that they grow like this. I think I was in my early 20s.

[–]The_Apostate_Paul 11 points12 points  (7 children)

That I don't believe in god. My dad is a preacher, so I was raised in the christian church (PCA), and all throughout my childhood I remember thinking that different aspects of christianity didn't make sense. Instead of questioning the faith itself, I assumed that I just didn't understand well enough. I feel like I've been duped. It fucking sucks.

[–]MilkyBeefPants 11 points12 points  (1 child)

The Doobie Brothers - for some reason I assumed doobie was their last name. Ironically I figured this out high as a kite

[–]Alkanfel 10 points11 points  (2 children)

that the lights which turn on when you put a car in reverse are clear because they're essentially rear headlights

[–]LuridTeaParty 10 points11 points  (1 child)

The South Park movie's title, Bigger, Longer, and Uncut, was a dick joke.

It never occurred to me for practically 20 years until recently.

[–]cashvin 12 points13 points  (2 children)

That Blink 182’s album “take off your pants and jacket” is really saying “take off your pants and jack it”.

[–]ropbop19 20 points21 points  (2 children)

That my freshman dorm was mostly girls.

No, nothing sexy happened. I'm still socially inept.

[–]lady-of-starfalI 108 points109 points  (7 children)

All of us must believe in UFO's.

all UFO's are real because they are by definition, 'unidentified flying objects.'

Now, whether or not we believe they are alien spacecraft is a different matter.

[–]RightAllDay 47 points48 points  (4 children)

Dominos pizza. I never really paid attention to exactly what that logo was. Last year I realized it is an actual domino. I am 25

[–]MrNotSafe4Work 10 points11 points  (0 children)

My native language is not English, but still.

That K9 units are called like that because that's how you pronounce "canine".

[–]Throawaya99999 42 points43 points  (13 children)

That the black guy from "This is Us" is the same guy from the OJ series and not the guy from Psych.

[–]ooh_de_lally 26 points27 points  (6 children)

The guy from Psych isnt the kid from the Cosby show either.

[–]Greigebaby 16 points17 points  (4 children)

I shouldn’t get married or live with someone again.

[–]B_Hallzy 90 points91 points  (21 children)

1st - First

2nd - Second

3rd - Third

4th - Fourth

[–]heisenberg747 26 points27 points  (1 child)

I used to have a cheap phone with a calendar app that would say 11st, 12nd, and 13rd.

[–]Serdaigle15 18 points19 points  (1 child)

Every English teacher for non English countries will correct you until you learn

[–]I-0_0-l 20 points21 points  (3 children)

... what did you think it was?

[–]Galiphile 26 points27 points  (9 children)

Not me, but:

One of my coworkers just realized why you refer to a gay guy's "girlfriend" as a beard last night. He's 20.

[–]crawling_king_snake1 57 points58 points  (5 children)

Yeah! Only an idiot wouldn't know something as obvious as that! But...maybe just in case there are some people who still can't work it out maybe you should explain it to them...Even though I already know...

[–]Galiphile 11 points12 points  (4 children)

[–]crawling_king_snake1 20 points21 points  (3 children)

Yeah in all seriousness though I knew that you call them a beard but I still don't know why. What does a beard have to do with anything? Why not call them a hat? Or a moustache? 🤔

[–]IWearBones138 18 points19 points  (3 children)

When a girl is into me.

Five years later, "fuck, I coulda got laid"

[–]kingnutter 15 points16 points  (1 child)

It improves with age. I've got it down to about 20 minutes now, so sometimes I can run down the street and catch them.

[–]tmoneydungeonmaster 9 points10 points  (2 children)

That the house immediately to right of the one I love in is an airbnb house.

Never understood how they could have so many different cars and family members but they were never all there at once

[–]Ssdgmok 8 points9 points  (0 children)

That one day you can choose to not be around family instead of feeling guilty or obligated to be around people that are really unhealthy for you.

[–]WholeGrainCereal 96 points97 points  (24 children)

That you don't need certain conditions in which to be happy. You can actively make the decision to react to any of your thoughts or feelings with compassion and even joy. You don't have to ride the rollercoaster in your head, you can just sit quietly and watch it from a bench nearby.

[–]Bostaevski 25 points26 points  (2 children)

I was a sophomore at Washington State University before I realized our cougar logo is made from the letters W-S-U.

[–]Pince1357 16 points17 points  (1 child)

Feather Boas are called that because they are like a feathery boa constrictor.

Figured that out this week. I’m 19.

[–]Skipstars 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Cement and Concrete are two different things.

Cement is powder and when mixed with sand, rock and water it becomes Concrete.

So it is actually incorrect to refer to concrete as “cement” because cement alone is just powder.

[–]CactusBathtub 13 points14 points  (5 children)

I always thought this dude on the back of the Alaska Airlines planes was Abraham Lincoln. I was at an embarassingly old age - like late 20s - to have figured out it is, in fact, not Honest Abe but an Alaskan Native.

[–]texbrown 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I used to think it was Bob Marley.

[–]JustOutsidePlayoffs 24 points25 points  (1 child)

The ending of the Stacy's Mom video. I thought the guy was just stood in the bedroom enjoying the mother sunbathe, I never realised he was jacking off to her.

[–]aegon-stark 22 points23 points  (0 children)

Movies are short for moving pictures