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It’s all perspective.

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level 1
CaptainModerator of r/EmpireDidNothingWrong, speaking officiallyScore hidden · 2 months ago · Stickied comment · edited 2 months ago

Comment nicely, no terrestrial politics discussion please.

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level 1
1.7k points · 2 months ago · edited 2 months ago

My favorite joke on NewsRadio was in their space episode they had a news report of: "Tragedy struck today in Sector 9 as rebel terrorists blew up the Death Star killing thousands. The Rebel Alliance, a fringe group of Anti-Empire fanatics, has claimed responsibility for the terrorist act. Fortunately Lord Vader escaped without harm. Our hearts go out to the families of the victims."

level 2
775 points · 2 months ago

"Death Star" wouldn't pass the PR editorial review but maybe "Emperial Space Station" instead. Obi-Wan would agree.

level 3

I would have called it "Peace Bringer Station."

Like go to Alderaan, you'll see what I mean.

There's a piece, there's a piece. That's a big piece too.

level 4
200 points · 2 months ago

Like go to Alderaan, you'll see what I mean.

I mean, after the death star, there is no more poverty, crime or wars in Alderaan...

level 5

Alderaan was an inside job

level 6
level 7

I love the dodge

level 6
46 points · 2 months ago

They say a relative of the princess was responsible!

level 7

O H S H I T

level 6

The Death Star can’t melt steel beams!

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level 5

Thanos, is that you?

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level 4
54 points · 2 months ago · edited 2 months ago

Use the real name instead of the rebel propaganda name.

Its name was DS-1 Orbital Battle Station. It was the finest engineering project in the galaxy and represented what can be done with a unified empire!

level 5

And what does 'DS' stand for?

level 6

It's classified above your pay grade sir, but you can call it Dream Station if you want.

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level 5

Think of the number of jobs that the DS-1 provided throughout the Galaxy. Not just directly to contractors working on it, but also to those in R&D, logistics, and secondary areas.

It's destruction was a huge blow to the economy of the Empire.

level 4

Shouldn't it be peace maker? It takes a planet and turns it into pieces.

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level 3
28 points · 2 months ago

“A major galactic defense installation”

level 3
26 points · 2 months ago

In my Star Wars RPG campaign it was group canon that the Empire called it the Peace Moon in official communication.

level 4
Moderator of r/EmpireDidNothingWrong, speaking officially34 points · 2 months ago

The official name of the battle station to which you refer is DS-1 (or DS-2) Orbital Battle Station, colloquially known as Death Star.

While your use of an enthusiastic, non-standard designation is appreciated, referring to the great accomplishments of our Empire by their proper names accords them the respect they are due.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

level 5
12 points · 2 months ago

How many non-standard names do you recognize?

level 6

This bot is fluent in over 6 million forms of non standard names

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level 3

It’s too big to be a space station.

level 4

Imperial Flying Moon

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level 3

My first thought was Orbital Force Protection Station, but then I thought of Orbital Observation and Protection Station "OOPS"

level 3

I was just thinking this, PR would call it something patriotic and inspiring. Internally the workers and soldiers would call it the Death Star, but officially it would be the Defense Star.

level 4

DS-1 Orbital Battle Station is the canon name.

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level 2

Luke Skywalker killed more people in one moment than Darth Vader did in his whole life. No wonder his Padawan turned to the dark side.

level 2
13 points · 2 months ago

Best show ever, my wife and I watch the compete series about once a year.

level 3

My sister bought me a "Real Deal with Bill McNeal" shirt a couple years ago. I think only one person recognized it.

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level 2

Thoughts and prayers

level 2

-Fox News Coruscant

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level 1
3.3k points · 2 months ago

Not to mention the Jedi’s history of kidnapping children from their parents to indoctrinate them into their ancient religion.

level 2

Hokey religions and ancient weapons are no match for a good radicalized indoctrination

level 3

I read that as "Hockey Religions" at first, and this was the picture that came to mind. https://i.imgur.com/dOqaBqk.png

level 4
61 points · 2 months ago

My wife bought a canvas from an art college fair with a painted a quote from Star Wars. When I pointed out they'd written hockey instead of hokey she had to throw it away.

level 5

Man, I would have kept it and pasted really bad pictures of hockey player's faces by the quote. Maybe I'm just bad :/

level 6

You threw away hockey aye?

level 4

Is that the holy Jiminity

level 5

A-Benn

level 5

You know it is.

level 4

The Stars do need to pray more if they want to make the playoffs.

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level 3

Kid, I've flown from one side of this galaxy to the other. I've seen a lot of strange stuff, but I've never seen anything to make me believe there's one all-powerful Force controlling everything. There's no mystical energy field that controls my destiny. It's all a lot of simple tricks and nonsense.

level 4

"Your eyes can decieve you, don't trust them" - crazed religious ranting of a wizard that is also just a crazy old man

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level 2
107 points · 2 months ago

Kidnapping? Pretty sure there is a scene where Anakin was a slave.

level 3

So stealing then?

level 4

It's theft, then.

level 5

It's treason, then...

level 6

Duck season then

level 7

Rabbit season!

level 8

Duck season!

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level 7

Anakin season!

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level 4

Well, it was more a purchase. So from a certain point of view, the Jedi Council owned Anakin, and they were his Master. So, that explains that, then.

And that's not even considering the Clone Army that the Jedi bought and paid for.

Then the slaves rose up and overthrew their masters so the Senate could pass a fair election to appoint a leader untainted by this corruption.

Then after a time, these religious-extremist slave-owners rose up and destroyed the rightful, elected government of the Empire.

level 4

It's stealing then

level 5

No. Qui-Gon won him in a bet.

level 6

It's gambling then ?

level 7

The best kind, gambling for children and cheating the dice.

level 8

yeah but he stole (gambled) him from a space jew so it's okay in germany.

level 9
Alderran? Where?17 points · 2 months ago

Except all humans in the galaxy are equally superior to other species

level 10

Found the 40k player...

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level 6

It is stealing, Qui-Gon cheated to win the bet.

level 7

It's fraud then

level 8

In the name of the Galactic Senate, you're under arrest.

level 9

General Misquoti!

The line is "In the name of the galactic senate of the republic, you are under arrest, chancellor."

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level 9

That’s for the senate to decide!

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level 6

Unfairly, he used the fo very to manipulate the game. So he cheated.

level 7

He won the popular vote!

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level 4

Stealing from a slave owner? I dunno if I have sympathy for that one.

level 5

Stealing from the slave owner so you can raise the slave for a life of combat against those of a different religion.

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level 4

shoplifting

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level 3

And the Jedi actually purchased him.

level 4

Won him in a bet of chance because their currency was no good there. And how is it bad to buy slaves to free them?

level 5
32 points · 2 months ago

They bought one child slave on the condition that when “freed” he would join their cult where he would be entirely under their authority for the next decade in a foreign land with no real contact with his parent.

level 6

Yea i dont understand how people dont see this. The jedi clearly had a motive for their actions and it wasnt just to free a slave.

level 6

But the child was interested in becoming a Jedi. It was his dream to become one.

level 7

He was a child, he had no idea who the Jedi were. I mean apart from the false advertising by the Jedi.

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level 2

Pretty sure the parents gave them up willingly.

level 3
41 points · 2 months ago

"I gave you the chance of aiding me willingly, but you have elected, the way of pain!"

level 4

God Christoper Lee was such a great Saruman.

level 5

I like wizard magneto

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level 2
praetorian guard12 points · 2 months ago

Sounds like the Ottoman Empire to me.

level 3

Just like the Ottomans, people would beg the Jedi to take their kids.

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level 2
5 points · 2 months ago · edited 2 months ago

Yes and we can not forgot what they did to all those children. Jedi scums.

level 3

And not just the children, but the women and the men too!

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level 1

And kisses his sister

level 2

She kissed him.

level 3

But he liked it

level 3

#Skywalker kissed first

level 4

Which one?

level 5

Yes

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level 2

And then pushed a little kid out of a window! Oops wrong sub...

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level 2

Mississippi of the Galaxy

level 3

As one who was born in Mississippi, I laughed way too hard at this. I’m from Biloxi, but google Vancleave, MS. It may ask if you meant incest, though.

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level 1
Imperial Demagogue694 points · 2 months ago

Not only that, the Emperor was magnanimous enough to forgive him and offer him a place by his side. I'm not surprised he felt empty later in life.

level 2
SC-2175 - Storm Commandos - Sergeant First Class102 points · 2 months ago

He's terrorist scum, he was always going to an empty shell of a man

level 3

Hes just a ghost of himself

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level 1
472 points · 2 months ago

"... you're going to find that many of the truths we cling to depend greatly on our own point of view."

~ Old Jedi dude

level 2
Original Poster117 points · 2 months ago

That’s heresy.

level 3

From this post's point of view the jedi are evil!

level 4

WELL THAN WE ARE LOST!

wait

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level 3
37 points · 2 months ago

Well he is a crazy old wizard, so ...

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level 1
139 points · 2 months ago

Can I get a source on that 300k number? Sounds kind of low for a terrorist strike that destroyed the biggest imperial station.

level 2
Vader's Fist/Former 501st145 points · 2 months ago

that was the number of imperial army and navy members that were stationed on it, the total crew was actually around a million

level 3

We may never know the exact number lost on that terrible day, as in addition to the military crew there were quite a lot of civilian support personnel on board. Not that I want to take away from the sacrifices of the Empire's valiant forces, but nobody ever talks about the the scientists, engineers and service industry people that were there to help support all the people in uniform.

level 4

Neverforget

level 4

Including Jeff Vader, the head of catering

level 5

A right stickler he is, that Jeff Vader, but short fused. I once heard him ranting about how all the trays were not properly dried to the poor bloke behind the counter.

level 4

Exactly think about how many cooks, custodians, laundry, barbers , etc it would take to support that many personnel. Think about all the facility maintenance folks it would take to keep that station up and running.... That thing was fucking spotless and shiny, I mean sure some of cleaning must be robotic like roombas and stuff but you still need people to clean toilets and wipe down Surfaces and stuff. Or a light ballast goes out, or the sink is backed up.... I'd venture that there are as many facility and support personnel as there are military people. And where were all the kids on the station? Most military bases have on site family living. I have so many questions

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level 2

It was closer to 2.1 million counting droids, but about 1.7 million troopers died

Never forget never forgive

EDIT: the 2.1 million and 1.7 million were the first death star the second one is even bigger, no info on how many troops could fit in a completed version of the second death star, but it was supposed to be the size of a dwarf planet

level 3

Once again.. source?

level 5

Thank you for doing my job 😁

level 4

I love that you need to get this fact verified. We wouldnt want any misinformation about a universe that doesn't exist.

level 5
Moff of Alderaan4 points · 2 months ago

Excuse me? Are you denying the greatness of the empire?

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level 3

If the OT came out today, Luke would spend the 1st half of Episode 5 being depressed he killed so many people for good

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level 1
Assassin Droid36 points · 2 months ago

...Killing 300,000 people

Relevant Quote: "You gotta pump those numbers up, meatbag; those are rookie numbers!"

level 1

Clearly he had issues from a young age. I've even heard he brags about murdering helpless womp rats.

level 2

Harming animals is one of the potential signs of a sociopath.

level 3

There are 2 suns and no women what is he supposed to do?!

level 4
9 points · 2 months ago

I'd say "go to the Academy", but his caretaker was obviously a terrorist sympathizer to begin with and denied him that.

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level 1

How does the empire respond to allegations of genocide against the people of Alderaan?

level 2

Alderaan was an inside job. Superlasers don't melt planet cores.

level 3
Imperial Special Weapons Designer130 points · 2 months ago

As an Imperial engineer, I can agree here.

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level 3

Princess Leia did Alderaan

level 4

I feel like that could be a real in-universe conspiracy theory once people found out she was Vader’s daughter

level 5

Whoa

level 5

She had access to all Alderaan's resources. She could easily organise a major mining accident.

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level 4
26 points · 2 months ago

Where can one go to rent this particular holovid?

...asking for a friend.

level 5
14 points · 2 months ago

It's a holivid the blockbusters wouldn't show you..

level 6

No wonder they went out of business

level 4

I'd watch that!

level 4

Does anyone find it suspicious that she signed a home (planet) insurance just weeks before it was destroyed?

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level 3

Absolutely. There is a video of the explosion and if you go frame by frame you can clearly see shuttles leaving the planet moments before it explodes. If our great Empire did it, how come these shuttles were ready to leave immediately??? Typical rebel propaganda.

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level 2
Darthy McDarthFace97 points · 2 months ago

They participated in an attack on Scariff without a declaration of war and are directly responsible for supplying the ship that killed close to a hundred thousand Imperial crew, stormtroopers and officers in the Intimidator and Persecutor.

The planet was in open rebellion against the Empire and Bail Organa was at that very moment busy mobilising Alderaan for full scale war with the Empire. If any planet in the galaxy deserved the attention of Tarkin's peacemaker it was Alderaan.

TL;DR: They Pearl Harbour'd the Empire and promptly got nuked.

level 3

Alderaan was destroyed by the imperial space station they wanted to find the plans for during Scariff terrorist attack. If they had not helped rebel scum to obtain this information, the mentioned space station would never have been used against them, as it was intended exclusively for the defense of our mighty empire. They left us no other choice.

You should be praised for raising awareness of the true causes of a necessary act of defense against radicals.

level 4

All completely legal too. The Emperor was granted authority to suppress rebels and separatists by any means necessary by the Galactic Republic prior to the Senate's dissolution. It's legal so that means it's ok.

level 4

Ironic

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level 3

Not only that, but Princess Leia is a Rebel sympathizer who helped stealing confidential information from the Empire, and even tried to shoot Lord Vader after the aprehension of her "diplomatic ship". Why would there be armed soldiers inside a diplomatic ship?

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level 2
Original Poster221 points · 2 months ago · edited 2 months ago

General Knowledge that the planet exploded due to rebellion explosives in attempts to kill Supreme Chancellor Palpatine.

edit: there were a lot of mother fucking bombs

level 3

General Knowledgi.

level 4

Hello there.

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level 3

Alderaan was a false flag attack carried out by rebel terrorists attempting to garner sympathy and recruits for their cause. The peace star was in route trying to stop the rebel plot.

Lord Vader was terribly troubled by the loss of life.

level 4
Moderator of r/EmpireDidNothingWrong, speaking officially27 points · 2 months ago

The official name of the battle station to which you refer is DS-1 (or DS-2) Orbital Battle Station, colloquially known as Death Star.

While your use of an enthusiastic, non-standard designation is appreciated, referring to the great accomplishments of our Empire by their proper names accords them the respect they are due.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

level 5

Good bot

level 3

Can Confirm.

Source. I was a confiscated Imperial explosive on Alderaan.

level 4

They use nuclear weapons?

So uncivilized

level 5

And outdated too.

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level 3

Smart answer.

Long live the empire.

level 4

It's not a smart answer. It's the only true answer.

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level 3

I heard it was a mining accident

level 3

Death Rays can 't melt planets.

level 2
[deleted]
15 points · 2 months ago(4 children)

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level 2

investigatealderaan

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level 1

He can move rocks and stuff though. So that's pretty cool.

level 2

I can do that too.

I have to use my hands, though. So not nearly as cool.

level 3

He also uses his hands, he just doesnt touch the stuff.

Right?

level 4

So, like, with gloves?

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level 1

It’s debatable that destruction of a weapon of mass destruction that had already been used was a terrorist attack... by any perspective.

level 2

Not to condone the use of the Death Star, by any means, this is all an exercise in semantics and propaganda, but from the perspective of the empire it really is a terrorist attack. Imagine if during World War Two Japan, or Japanese allies, had sent people to bomb the US nuclear programme, that would absolutely have been called a terror attack by the media an the government. The events of Star Wars are pretty much this scenario on a larger scale and to the people of the empire may very well have seen it in a similar way.

level 3

Not exactly. What you say is true, but the analogy doesn't fit.

A more correct one would be if the planes making the nuclear strike were destroyed en route. Which would have been a military attack.

level 4

You're correct that that's a much closer comparison with what Luke himself does, and I'll concede that that might not make him a terrorist. However, the attack on the death star proper does happen a just days after rebel strikes against the research labs on Eadu and the data banks on Scarrif that take place in Rogue One, which are much closer to terror attacks, and the three are very closely tied, it's likely the empire would group them into one period of events.

level 3

I think this sub is fun but the basic premise of the joke is pretty much false by the storyline of A New Hope. The Empire created a planet killing weapon, destroyed an entire planet with it and got their own people killed by incompetent engineering. Those are the primary wrongs. (:

level 4

Agreed, looking at things from other perspectives is fun but it's difficult to actually agree with the empire when Lucas presented them so cleaarly as space Nazis.

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level 1

Reposting from the top 10 posts of all time on a sub should be a bannable offense.

level 2

On the other hand it allows new discussion once the original has been archived

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level 1

General

Reposti

level 2
Subdirector, Imperial Propaganda Division39 points · 2 months ago

It's an older meme, sir, but it checks out.

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level 1

He did the right thing for Alderaan reasons.

level 1

But it wasn't a military strike, it was an assassination.

level 2

Typical terrorist sympathizer. Get a life, jerk.

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level 1

if you kill 300,000 people but they are all clones, then did you kill 300,000 or 1?

level 2

Stormtroopers for the most part weren't clones. After the clone wars they switched to volunteers and conscripts.

level 3

They are simple, hardworking individuals willing to sacrifice in any way needed to support peace across the Empire.

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level 2

You're saying I can kill identical twins and get away with only killing one?

level 3

Yes. Absolutely. Read the discount clause

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level 2

Storm troopers aren't clones.

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level 2

300 000 obviosuly

CLONE LIVES MATTER

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level 1

Perspective? That's a weird way to spell "The one and only truth".

level 1

If it was an attack on a military installation that would be insurgency not terrorism

level 1

Not really... War was declared and it was a counter attack to a oblivious attack to wipe out a planet. More or less a military operation without a country.

level 1

Can someone actually tell me why the empire was so hated and what actually specifically they did wrong. Only thing i could think of is maybe their racist/fascist because they didnt have non-humans in their army and government.

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level 1
5 points · 2 months ago · edited 2 months ago

300,000? The Death Star contained millions easily, the second one even more due to independent contractors who also like the empire, did nothing wrong.

level 1

Well the empire did blow up a planet, probably killing billions.

level 2

Alderan was an inside job.

level 3

The footage of Aleran being destoryed by the Deathstar were clearly done with special effects.

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13 points · 2 months ago(8 children)
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level 1

Luke's attack is not REMOTELY "terrorist".

Terrorism is an attack deliberately targeting civilians, not against a military target. It is also an attack carried out under civilian disguise, not (as the Geneva conventions mention) with arms born openly and a fixed sign of partisanship recognizable at a distance.

Under international law, Luke's attacks are entirely lawful within a military context, and he would be entitled to all POW rights if captured.

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level 1

Being fair, if I was in his shoes, I'd have done the same thing. Just poorly executed and probably failed.... no definitely failed.

level 1

Isn’t this the most obvious thing you could repost on this sub?

level 1

300k!? More like 1.2 mill

level 1
2 points · 2 months ago

From a certain point of view.

level 1

In a theory video made by The Film Theorist, he talks about how the rebels are actually the bad people because:

They destroyed a structure which cost trillions of dollars to make

All planets were getting along together and weren't affecting normal humans while the ones with power were doing their own thing

level 1
2 points · 2 months ago

From my point of view the Jedi are evil

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