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When I was looking through my photos, I realized I unknowingly took two pictures of the same bull, 5 years apart, at a ranch I visit in Texas.

714 comments
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Comment deleted6 months ago(28 children)
353 points · 6 months ago

This is a good idea. They'll love something like this on their wall.

I mean he could directly post it on their wall, right?

Oh please be joking

38 points · 6 months ago

That's not how this works, that's not how any of this works

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That's a great idea. I think I'll send them something today.

Wait a minute....

I think hes trying to steer you in the wrong direction

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5.2k points · 6 months ago

I feel like we all passed a class in cow identification today.

In India, all cows are soon to get id cards with biometric mapped to unique numbers.

Your mother's getting a tag?

Jesus RIP

185 points · 6 months ago

Sorry man, he arose.

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Username checks out

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He said India, not Mexico.

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36 points · 6 months ago

I'd just like to say I was here the day u/logic-bomb was obliterated off this planet we call Eart

I, for one, will miss Eart

He was a good plant

You people

What do you mean 'you people'?!

What do YOU mean 'you people'?!

Those from shithole countries of course :/

black people.

You are now banned from /r/worldnews.

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Come on 4-20, It’s the Lords day.

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calling the burn unit irl

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Lord have mercy.

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Beautifully uncalled for.

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Cowell was right, Mooty84 is happening, Big Bovine is watching.

[deleted]
6 points · 6 months ago

Moodhar FTW

cowdhaar?

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95 points · 6 months ago · edited 6 months ago

class in cow identification today.

I'm afraid that's a bull. Perhaps your instructor steered you wrong?

I believe he meant to say cattle identification but missed the bulls-eye.

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Comment deleted6 months ago(13 children)

That’s racist af.

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Comment deleted6 months ago(0 children)

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Really? Nothing else is different (genetic makeup or diet, ect)? Serious, what's the logic behind that?

Angus is a breed of cow. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Angus_cattle they are all black.

I presume the regulation says the cow just has to be black but the vast majority are going to be this breed.

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7 points · 6 months ago

I'm so proud of all of us here on Reddit

Til cows get sun burned

Cowdenification?

Not to be a bully, but the last letters of "cow" and first of "identification" aren't even the same. So no, not "Cowdenification".

[deleted]
102 points · 6 months ago

Identificowtion?

Now we talkin'

Cow we're talkin

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4.2k points · 6 months ago · edited 6 months ago

"You know Ethel, I saw a human with glass eye box today. He pointed it straight at me. I believe I've seen that exact same guy, like years ago. I wonder if he remembers?"

  • That bull, a little later.

850 points · 6 months agoGilded1 · edited 6 months ago

Is that you Gary Larson?

edit: Thank you. Rarely post. I loved Gary Larson as a kid.

Not enough fat people.

62 points · 6 months ago

...named Doug

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Do kids know about Gary Larson anymore?

I do, but only because my dad and grandparents have a few of those comic compilations.

You come from good people.

This exactly. When I was learning to read, my parents had a bunch of Far Side and Calvin and Hobbes books.

Pro tip: If you’re looking for a gift for a kid, I’ve never seen books like those fail. Kids will giggle like crazy, and they are fantastic reading practice.

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I like that you named the cow Ethel. Thats a good cow name.

Good aardvark name too.

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171 points · 6 months ago

"He's a nice fellow, hair used to be a little long around the eyes but looks like he's got a nice clean haircut right now. Face has cleared up, his back seems straighter also. Must be taking care of himself. Looks proud. He should be."

That bull is a nice old dad bull in my head. This is how I imagined my grandparents neighbors dog for the 10 years he used to sit outside and see me come visit for holidays. From my long hair acne phase, to skinny jeans and silverstein shirts, finally to settling into the person I am today, that old golden saw it all.

12 points · 6 months ago

Hah, your comment reached my heart.

5 points · 6 months ago

And my eyes!

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welp. this is my personal favorite comment of the day and i smiled at it. good job human person.

Do you know persons who are not human? O__o

Are we human or are we dancer?

I used to wonder if it was "denser?"

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on the contrary, i know humans who are not person

Comment deleted6 months ago(1 child)

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[deleted]
15 points · 6 months ago

Dogs are persons who are not humans

Non-human persons is a thing. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Non-human

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YES activating laugh.exe HAHA, I AM TOTALLY A HUMAN.

I had to activate OhMyGodADosReference.exe to get that.

3 points · 6 months ago

did you mean

OhMyGo~1.exe

?

ceterum censeo "unit libertatem" esse delendam.

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3 points · 6 months ago

Every account on reddit is a bot except you.

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That's very Farside

9 points · 6 months ago

Ethel is a cow!

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How long has he been standing there?

606 points · 6 months ago

5 Years?

99 points · 6 months ago

It’s a statue, you fools.

50 points · 6 months ago · edited 6 months ago

Only 2 more years until the limitations run out, and the bull will finally be able to move.

and the bull will finally be able to moo

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6 points · 6 months ago

11 years

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347 points · 6 months ago

That cow seems to have had a rough 5 years

He definitely saw some shit in those 5 years.

Bull...shit?

Bravo my friend, bravo.

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If you actually wanna know it's just grass lice and poor management. Those pink/white patches are his skin poking through as his coat falls out. Honestly all you need to do is pour a drench on him every 6 months, it's not hard to take care of your bulls/steers.

I hope this isn't OP's family member treating his cows shit :(

What's drench?

Basically a chemical that you pour on the base of the cow's tail/back which soaks into their coat and skin and kills both types of lice. You can also get drench for worms/other pests and diseases, too!

Is it expensive? We should start a gofund me for the cow, I'll chip in 20. I also don't trust the owners, so I think a companion and travel costs should be included.

It would be like one of those sites were you anonymously send someone breathmints or deodorant as a hint, but in this case to a rancher as a hint to TAKE CARE OF HIS FUCKING COWS/BULLS!

A container that can do a few dozen cows is about a hundred bucks. But even if you treated him, it'd take a while for his hair to grow back (the reason you can see his skin is because the lice burrowing/biting/sucking has caused him to rub that area against something and literally rub the skin raw :( )

He'd probably just pocket the $100 because he really screwed himself over with how he managed that bull (trying to get that bull in a crush for example, is impossible due to his head having a side clearance of like 7 feet.)

It kills parasites and stuff

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:(

I'm not even done complaining about the problems with this picture either! People suck! Pat your pets!

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Did he specifically ask you to only photograph him from that side?

I came to point out that there are probably other photos of this bull in the collection too, but for the other side.

"This side: Brad Pitt, this side: David Spade--not so cute."

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531 points · 6 months ago
94 points · 6 months ago

his horns have achieved critical mass

Good grief they must have massive neck muscles to hold up all that weight

126 points · 6 months ago

They're actually hollow and full of helium.

Well I guess a hollow neck filled with helium would help hold up those horns equally well.

I believe the first half of your sentence but....

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And 24/7 headaches to go along

"Well, we have a flat tire now."

"Shit, now I can't clean the windows!"

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Bulls are crazy strong animals, not to mention, they have very little fat in them, and a lot of testosterone. They’re heads in general are heavy without the horns, so the added weight is like nothing for those bulls. As a butcher, I can confirm that neck meat is extremely tough and lean even in heifers.

Bulls are unbelievably strong, and because that weight is on their head and has been developing all it's life, the neck muscles would grow stronger to adapt for the added weight.

That last bull looks like he gets stuck on gates a lot.

His enemies thinnk he has great peripheral vision because he gores them as they run up on him from the sides. "Wth, man, he didn't even flinch! It's like Ethel Norris!"

Ethel Norris!

Meta

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Wait wtf that's 4 years from now

I still have this weird feeling in my head that 2020 is so far away... When it's just in 2 years. I feel old.

Holy shit, you're right.

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Jesus those horns don't stop growing. You should show him your badge so he doesn't chase you.

Meta?.. old meta???

Expect a repost on /r/jokes soon

It'll be the 4th time this year, it'll be unexpected if we don't see it :/

I was about to say 4 times in 365 days isn't too bad before I remembered we're in 2018 now. Jesus that sub is bad.

Actually it's been posted 13 more times since he made that comment. That sub is really bad.

47 points · 6 months ago

This style of joke is very reminiscent of Desi humor/latifay

Thats an oldie

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So old its delicious. Like that bull will be.

Bruh it's at least 6 years old in the second picture that's not delicious, more like so hard your jaws won't work for a week after two bites.

Just how I like it. ;)

With ketchup too I bet , you monster

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"Badges? Badges?! We don't need no stinking badges!"

Looks like he's a lot more horny.

Nah the vet gives him a wank once a month, into a little bottle. He's doing good.

little bottle

Ouch, you know how to hurt a dude.

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Aren't we all?

I've had the old bull, now I want the young calf

Shut the fuck up Dale!!!

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44 points · 6 months ago

Loooooooooooooooonghorn.

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As we know well here on Reddit, there's lots of karma in posting pictures of the same bull

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You vs the guy she tells you not to worry about

That's actually a sweet complement. "I like you now, but I like you 5 years later even more"

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As an older person trying to date I definitely feel like the "guy she told you not to worry about" is the top one

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That's so wholesome. Don't worry about the future :)

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Out standing in his field.

Longhorn af.

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You need to contact that ranch lol. They would probably love this!

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What a load of bull.

[deleted]
54 points · 6 months ago

That bull has seen some shit.

Pretty goddamn haggard

His wife Moolissa ran off with another bull and took the calves with her. Its been hard

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Should post this in progress pics.

He hasn’t moved since

Moooved

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What a glowup

Wow the graphics have come a long way in 5 years

He has not aged well

10 points · 6 months ago

at least that mothafucka ain’t on the menu.

19 points · 6 months ago

A very interesting comparison! Awesome how you got the same pose as well.

I find it intriguing how rough life shows on its hide. Looks like one mean son of a bitch who's been challenged many times along the way.

Probably not. Longhorns are usually pretty well taken care of, because they are worth so much money. In the top pic, he was still a calf. The spots on their hides darken with age. Just like with puppies and kittens, and just about any animal.

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It looks like he turned from a regular milk cow into a chocolate milk cow.

It's a bull. You don't want any of his milk. Unless you're into that kind of thing.

i want his milk. that spunk is worth a small fortune

12 points · 6 months ago

Only if his lineage is any good.

looks like hes being used for breedin instead of slaughtering since he hasnt been killed yet

5 points · 6 months ago

You has point friend.

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6 points · 6 months ago

Did he remember you?

Looks like he leveled up a bit.

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I expected to see a comment link by now with a pic of a steak labled another 5 years later.

So cute!

This guerrilla marketing campaign for the new Ferdinand movie needs work.

Everyone is saying he looks bad...I think he looks sassy

I actually didn't know horns could get that long

28 points · 6 months ago

It's a longhorn

29 points · 6 months ago

I don't know, sounds pretty vague to me.

It's an indeterminatelengthhorn.

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Look up ankole-watusi, blows my mind every time I see one. They make longhorns look like babies.

They must have some crazy strong neck muscles.

11 points · 6 months ago

A pointy boi

i like that he's still wearing the earring he got during his rebellious years

It's kind of like seeing a picture of your adult friend during their awkward teenage years.

He has become majestic af!

Five years from now you're gonna be taking a pic of a hamburger for Instagram and have a sudden realization..

3 points · 6 months ago · edited 6 months ago

He's gotten a lot hornier waiting for you to return.

how do you know it's a bull?

3 points · 6 months ago

Because it only has one nipple fer milkin'

He looks worn down and decrepit, he must have sold all of his bitcoin.

Bull looks like he's seen some shit in those 5 years..

Holy cow!

Only two things come from Texas.

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Jeez. Time was not kind to that bull.

Time is not kind to any of us.

You right you right

That bull has seen some miles.

Feel old yet?

love these bulls

oopsdidntmeanto

2 points · 6 months ago

Did Google photos find those two photos and make a collage?

2 points · 6 months ago

'unknowingly'

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Damn, those horns are huge!!

Just for Youtube's sake, would you mind driving out to that ranch and taking a picture of the same bull in the same position every day for the next five years?

"Longhorn growing up timelapse"

I'll search for this in another five years. Op, pls.

/s/

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