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1.4k points · 2 days ago

We didn't get summer this year.

We were covered in BC's fucking smoke for 2 months and then this shit.

To the non-edmontonians: it actually started snowing LAST week

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My aunt lives in Le Duc, I live on the east coast. Last week we enjoyed 25+ degree weather and she posted pictures of snow. Of course I made a point to laugh at her every time. Monday it was 32° here. Now I'm wearing a sweater. I'm inside. Fuck Canadian fall/winters

I don't know you, but I love you. Thank you for this.

I will love you even more in about half hours time after I engage with some sticky icky myself and reread this.

Grade 6, Mr. Hache. He "taught" French and science. He actually just slept most of the class and would wake up and talk about his boat.

Grade 9, Mrs. Casey. Mrs. Casey taught us grade 8 French so it would only make sense she would go on to change schools and teach us grade 9 math. I told her I didn't get math. She assured me a 60. I ended up with a 42. Fuck that bitch.

Grade 12 round 2 (my second senior year AKA "Victory lap", fuck you Mrs. Casey). Mr. Matheson. There was something off about Matheson. We all made jokes about him liking young boys. A couple of years later, he became principal of a different school. He was caught posing as a woman and getting 14 year old boys to send him videos of them masturbating.

231 points · 3 days ago

The only fun part about t bagging is when the tbagger gets shot in the head for doing it.

It is like all those races when the lead is so fucking sure they are going to win so they start to slow down and do some "I am the champion" shit. While the second sees the chance and guns its and takes the win. The schadenfreude is priceless.

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78 points · 3 days ago

I do that in Forza/Grand Theft Auto an embarassing amount, hit the emergency brake a tad too early, try and cross going backwards, get t-boned, and they blow past me.

As opposed to?

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As opposed to hitting the emergency brake a tad bit later, and driving backwards through finish line like a badass instead of the dumbass I am.

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3 points · 6 days ago

This is going to be my new background on my phone. Thank you

You can say either "Your Majesty" or "Your Royal Highness" when first speaking to her, then Ma'am afterwards.

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0 points · 6 days ago

I believe it's also acceptable to call her "Mum" on any secondary addresses to her during the conversation.

I prefer it. Even if I'm in a committed relationship with a girl, I prefer she makes all of the first moves. There's been way too many horror stories about guys getting accused of varying degrees of sexual assault because of his looks/the date went poorly that I get major fucking anxiety when talking to women.

I get that it's a very small minority of women who will falsely accuse a guy of anything if a date/hookup goes poorly, but it still worries me to no end.

Red on positive, black on negative.

I seen this coming. Too bad Rhianna didn't

Wow... I read part of that site... Just fucking wow...

Thank you

I play with a gun. I also play with dead animals. Some of you may have even bought my product. Who knows? ;)

We were drunk at a grad party. It's him, me, a lady. We're all laying beside each other. We're playing truth or dare and he's playing my wingman. After a few rounds, I'm naked except for one solitary sock on. He eventually seen my cock on her phone

9 points · 28 days ago

Unintentionally killing someone might be a little worse than sexual deviance.

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I much rather break my arm in an unfortunate shellfish lubricant induced, vacuum assisted masturbation session than almost kill someone because of my arrogance

People have admitted to worse things here

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What type of stuff do people admit to?

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And Hobbes is where the award streak ends

28 points · 1 month ago

Right after the wedding, I notice my girlfriend at the time, talking to a friend of the groom (the groom was my brother). The guy she was talking to was notoriously horny so when I approached, he made a "shhhhhh" motion and walked off. I asked her what that was about. She told me that the guy was in love with the bride and that my brother didn't deserve her. How it should've been him. Etc.

Baby Kev, if you somehow read this, I haven't told either of them, but if you do ANYTHING to hurt that marriage, I will ruin you.

Holy fuckin' shit. JESUS FUCKIN' CHRIST! WHO THINKS THAT WOULD BE A GOOD IDEA!?

TIL; This dog is infinitely smarter than most people I know. Can she become my manager?

Godfuckingdamnit...

Fuck...

Here... Take my updoot... You've unfortunately earned it...

She's either 3 feet tall or The Rock is secretly Hagrids cousin.

u/Blazanar
Karma
7,661
Cake day
April 8, 2016
Trophy Case (1)
Two-Year Club

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