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My wife hanged herself by elaraishy2000 in widowers

[–]DavisTasar 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Talk. Talk to the people you trust. Talk to the people who can help you.

If you haven't gone to a therapist, open up the metaphorical phone book and start looking.

Holding on to the memory and reliving it isn't going to help you. But I promise you that it can be different.

Lost my wife last night... by RedBullRyan in widowers

[–]DavisTasar 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Man, I'm so sorry. I really and truly am. I've lost my wife, and my daughter was taken from me.

Right now, I promise you, everything fucking sucks. And it's going to fucking suck for a very, very, *very* long time. It's the honest to universal truth. And you'll need to be okay with taking help from anyone and everyone close to you.

It's okay to fall down. It's okay to lay on the ground for a while. Your partner was your better half, and now you don't have them in the physical world. But they live on in your mind. And you just have to re-learn how to be yourself. But we'll worry about that later.

For right now, you just worry about waking up tomorrow. And then getting out of bed. And then repeating it, until someone tells you to go take a shower. And that's your life for a while.

And that is perfectly okay.

We're here for you. All of us are.

I want to tell you a story. by DavisTasar in darksouls

[–]DavisTasar[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm glad it made your day, it always makes me laugh when I think of it. Praise the sun, see you out there.

I want to tell you a story. by DavisTasar in darksouls

[–]DavisTasar[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Fair, I guess I just never experienced much of the public gameplay, invasions and the like, there weren't that many signs on the ground so I just figured much like later versions that was the key.

Tattoo? by mydgnim in widowers

[–]DavisTasar 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You should absolutely get one. I got her last journal entry.

I think many have shared this idea already, but I'll just further add on to it. Your partner is never going to leave you. They're an integral part of your person. Your spirit, your memories, your existence. If you consider future partners, they're going to have to consider him. And for anyone to be worthy of your love, they'll need to be worthy of your experiences, your life, your actions, and what you've gone through. You will be talking about him to future people. Ink just makes it that much more important.

Get the tattoo. Embrace it. Enjoy it. Get something he would have loved.

On This Day by lesb0t in widowers

[–]DavisTasar 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I hate that feature. Anything that posts about my kid, or my wife, it just pisses me off. I know why its there, and yes, I'm sure that some point it's going to be heart warming to go, "Oh look, on this day we were doing that, yeah, that's right, I remember."

It just fucking sucks.

Widow at 26 with a 3 month old baby. by Chelseatravie in widowers

[–]DavisTasar 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The answer is the same stupid phase that everyone is going to say over and over and over.

One day at a time.

And it's stupid. You get up, you do some arbitrary thing in life, and be angry or depressed that whatever thing you did you can't share with that partner any longer.

And then you have to hear over and over how sorry everyone is, but they don't get it. Theyre sad, but they're not empty.

Just hug your children. Hold them, sit in silence with them. Breathe with them.

And you take it one stupid step at a time.

And you get help when you can.

Widow at 26 with a 3 month old baby. by Chelseatravie in widowers

[–]DavisTasar 4 points5 points  (0 children)

First of all, I am so fucking sorry. Its terrible to go through the experience, but to also have it in...just...fuck. I'm so fucking sorry.

People around here use the phrase, "welcome to the club no one wanted to join." And its the fucking truth. Right now? Everything sucks. It sucks, and it sucks hard. Make sure you have a support system. And let them run with it. Right now, your only goals and functions in life are to breathe, hold your baby, and feel the cuddles of your dogs. Let other people take whatever it is they can for help to you right now. If they want to cook, or clean, or help with the baby, let them. Please, let them.

We are here. Everyone here in this place knows and understands this pain, this loss, this tragedy. Everyone here can understand what it means to say what you've said, to wake up and have those same questions. We don't necessarily have the answers for you, but we understand.

I am so sorry.

I siege bombed a guard tower by DavisTasar in DnDGreentext

[–]DavisTasar[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I'd honestly had a very long standing goal of becoming a cruise missile with this character. And I accomplished it last night. My legit goal was to find the Gong, and I found it. And then the creative moment struck of, "I CAN FIND THE GONG WITH MY FACE."

And I did it.

Questions about getting into the interest by DavisTasar in GoRVing

[–]DavisTasar[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't consider you "the bad guy" whatsoever, I think they're very real concerns and had I not considered them myself, these would be new to me, so I appreciate you making sure they're brought up.

My girls (dogs) are very sweet, but they are Pitbulls and I know the name has a very sore reputation with it, and that's just something to be dealt with over time. And given that I'd be spending most of the day time inside/around the camper, and potentially taking rides during the evening (hopefully with the dogs? Maybe?) I'd work with them to have them not bark.

The cats like the outdoors, they just hate car rides. And depending on if I get into things, how long, etc., I'd really try hard to make accommodations to help them feel like they can lounge outside in the sun without being free to run off. But that's a question to be answered later.

But again, don't consider you the bad guy at all, and I appreciate your insights and commentary :).

Questions about getting into the interest by DavisTasar in GoRVing

[–]DavisTasar[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The thought had originally crossed my mind, but couldn't handle the idea of something happening to them.

<Routine>Of course its extraordinarily dangerous to drive the trailer with any participants inside.</Routine:>

Questions about getting into the interest by DavisTasar in GoRVing

[–]DavisTasar[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's a good thought. I know most people have an irrational fear of the breed.

And yeah, I'm starting to feel that way.

Questions about getting into the interest by DavisTasar in GoRVing

[–]DavisTasar[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I appreciate that. I think the biggest concern I have is moving two cats and two dogs simultaneously in one cab vehicle. Dogs wouldn't really care, Cats would probably have an issue with the travel and need to be crated up and just scream constantly (a very talkative Russian Blue).

Questions about getting into the interest by DavisTasar in GoRVing

[–]DavisTasar[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sadly that's kind of what I'm thinking. I didn't want to get the Tundra when I bought a new vehicle, but that was before I thought about just saying "maybe just say screw it all."

Also, I'm not gonna lie, between the two posts, I genuinely thought 'Taco' meant referring to food, not the fact that I have a Tacoma. It wasn't until you wrote

3 trips with my '17 Taco and couldn't trade it in fast enough.

Did I go, "Oh. Taco means Tacoma, not like, food."

Questions about getting into the interest by DavisTasar in GoRVing

[–]DavisTasar[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I'd prefer not to white knuckle a drive as I'm moving about. Truth be told, I'd just like that freedom to move around as I'd want to and go from place to place.

Budget I'm not too worried about, arrogant enough to say. I plan to take the difference of the sales of the house and invest that into the unit. I'd like to make certain that I don't purchase a new vehicle.

Update: They're taking my child (pt.3) by DavisTasar in legaladvice

[–]DavisTasar[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's what I did. In the follow-up, I had the coverage points for the time period and what was covered.

It still didn't help.