Hear hear for bitching! I bitch here, mostly, to you and a couple others. Also this is an interesting point. I think we're going to have IUI/IVF officially recommended to us soon, and I don't know if that's something I want to do physically (it scares me) and financially it's bonkers. TI hasn't worked so far. So right now I'm struggling to wrap my head around whether or not IVF, etc would even be possible on a few levels, and if looking at adoption should be on the table now as well. Maybe I need to weigh more heavily on the "how will it feel/be if adoption is the primary route to a family". Because so far I'm not doing a good job accepting things.
I agree with Coog, but we went the other direction (tw: loss) We were saving up for IVF, doing our research on clinics abroad and feeling pretty good about it. After our recent CP, we both realized we couldn't handle a failed IVF emotionally, no way. That was something I hadn't considered before.
We went to the Killers concert tonight!! It was AWESOME! We bought tickets last year, just when we started trying and we remember saying “gosh I hope I’m not to pregnant to go!” Lol. Sweet summer us. Anyway, it was a great concert and we had a fab night. If anyone has the chance to go see them ever, GO!! Flowers is incredible ❤️🙌🏼
We got lawn seats instead of pit tickets for Weezer next month for that same reason 🙄 Glad you had a good time!
Has anyone tried TalkSpace? I had a therapist I loved but he really didn't understand the basics of infertility and what I'm going through and I couldn't get as much as I'd like have to out of it. I'm looking for someone in my area but was wondering if anyone has a positive or negative experience with this instead?
(tw: loss) I had no idea that a CP/MC could take so damn long! That's probably one of the hardest parts of this, I had 5 days of brown and now day 3 of bright red. I just want this to be over and behind me :( Meanwhile, I work for an OB so I'm congratulating all my newly pregnant patients while wearing a giant diaper pad and I just want to cry
You are a wicked strong person. [Cw:loss] I never knew this could take so long either, I'm 5 weeks out and betas are still at 2.2, sigh. I so feel you on just wanting to move on.
I'm so sorry!! My betas are dropping quickly so I'm lucky that way but the bleeding is not slowing down at all. It gives no fucks what my betas are, it's going to bleed as long as it pleases, apparently
(tw: CP) 2 weeks ago, my Dr suggested we think about a long term plan of IVF since we're not going to do IUI. I stalked posts and did a ton of research on going abroad.
1 week ago I got a BFP and, though cautious, couldn't help but dive into baby planning.
Today I'm waiting for it to pass, and discussing with H how if I'm hurting this badly now, the idea of paying $10k and traveling the world for a failed IVF may ruin me. He agrees.
Life's been a rollercoaster and I'm just sad at where we're left. I didn't think this would ever be me :(
Thank you all for the advice. Woke up to text from her this morning that sounded way calmer than I imagine I would be. I'm going to let her take the lead on this as recommended. she's said she wants to avoid a lot of pity but asked me to arrange something at work so we could all acknowledge it.
Honestly the timing is throwing me. She was on such a high the day before I heard things weren't okay and had just started to really let go of the worry and caution and start openly telling people. The universe is cruel sometimes, but at least I can avoid adding to that.
I've been flipping randomly and suddenly between just fine and hysterical tears. I send my updates and texts during my fine moments so I can feel like a real person again for a bit and not just broken. Not trying to make it about me, just giving perspective for where she might be, emotionally.
The worst thing is for you to pretend that it didn't happen. You don't have to address it until she tells you, but this loss will always be apart of her. It's not her fault, it didn't happen for a reason, and it doesn't matter that there opportunities to try again. It doesn't have to be justified. Just acknowledge that it happened, and be her support. Let her talk and share her feelings.
I didn't outright tell my friend that I had an early miscarriage. She knew that I was probably pregnant (told her about the faint line on my test) and that I wasn't drinking as a precaution. A week or two later, she messaged me to see if I was able to drink with her, and I said yes. She celebrated. I was so broken.
The fact that you care enough to notice, enough to post on here, shows how caring you are. She's lucky to have you.
What the fuck?? That's a hard one to get over, I'm so sorry.
So last night I went to the ER. I went to the bathroom before bed and when I wiped there was fresh blood and then a big clot fell out of me and more blood. That’s how my last MC started so I was so scared. My husband is out of town for another two weeks so I ended up phoning my sister to take me. Thankfully the ER was empty. The ER doctor checked the baby and its still alive. He gave me a doctors note to be on bed rest for a week and I think I’ll be getting a better ultrasound to see what’s up with the blood. I was hoping the blood would be a one time thing but when I got home the toilet was filled with fresh blood and again this morning more fresh blood when I wipe. It feels like I’m on my period. But at least I know at this moment the little embryo it still alive. Hoping for the best.
Oh I'm so sorry, I can't imagine the level of anxiety you must be having. I'll be thinking of you and your little embryo 💜
I still feel totally fine and am trying not to panic over it. My brain know that's 100% normal but my anxiety is clearly in charge. 18 days to my sono.. I can totally hang. This is fine.
We've had a girl name too (boy names are hard). Just one of many reasons we are hoping for a girl.
Between not having the slightest idea on a boy name after a year of TTC, and the unbudging DIFFERENT opinions between H and me on whether or not to circ, we really need this to be a girl lol
Cycle: 9 of TI, 12 altogether
We hit O-3, O-2, O-1 and O. Usually we don't even come close to that so we were exhausted but I guess it worked!
Tracking methods: Flo app and OPKs. My sleep is too irregular to temp accurately
Symptom spotting: CD9 I went to taco Bell and (TW) they DISCONTINUED THEIR NACHO FRIES!!?! I cried a little when I found out, so that was kinda weird but not entirely unlike me. I also haven't been sleeping well, I'm awake all night. Other than that, no symptoms.
Positive test: CD12. I actually thought CD11 was CD1 but then the spotting stopped? I only tested to put the nail in the coffin but saw a suuuper squinter and immediately ran out for a FRER.
Supplements/medications: my 3rd cycle of clomid, they bumped me up to 100mg this month (days 5-9), coQ10 200mg twice a day (H too), baby aspirin, 1-2 cups red raspberry leaf tea/day (luckily I really like it), and progesterone supplements at night during the LP. (Plus a prenatal vitamin)
Birth control history: I had a mirena for 6 years, removed 4/17
Typical cycle length: anywhere from 32-49 days
Health conditions: PCOS and an annoyingly thin endometrial lining
Link to lineporn: https://redd.it/8ahuff
Miscellaneous: I started acupuncture ths cycle, too, to try and increase bloodflow and thicken my lining. I didn't do a sono to know if that worked but it WAS incredibly relaxing so I'll probably continue it. In the meantime I'm just nervous as hell for this to stick. My ob JUST had the Come to Jesus talk with us about potential IVF if this cycle didn't take so this is a huge shock.
It's a really close call IMO. But I too used an Easy@Home test today after using a different brand yesterday and that line today was FAR lighter than my other tests, which is giving me low level anxiety about lowering HCG Levels, just reminding myself different tests have different sensitivities. I hope it darkens up! It might be a good idea to get a different brand as well!
Good luck to you, too!!
CD1. We decided against IUI because the cost vs our likely success rate just isn't worth it. So I have an HSG next month (and am strangely hoping they find something wrong to fix!) and then just 🤞🏼 and TI while saving for IVF abroad, likely not for another year or 2. Fuck this.
"My feet are cold"
"Why is that, do you think?"
"Don't know. Maybe that's why I'm not pregnant. Chinese medicine people say you need to keep your feet warm"
"Oh, honey. They don't know anything. They grind up dried dicks!" [wanders off to get me a heat pack]
He always knows the right thing to say.
😂😂😂 that's fantastic. I told H about that wives tale and now every time I get pessimistic about TTC he tells me to go put some socks on