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envymesammi commented on a post in r/Showerthoughts
katibear 2 points

Hey. I just finished binge watching the sopranos. Holy shit, it’s the perfect show. I have no words.

envymesammi 2 points

Holy shit hello again! And I'm so glad you liked it 😭💕

katibear 2 points

I not only liked it, I think it’s my favorite show of all time. It’s a masterpiece! Thanks for the recommendation! I’m literally reading essays and articles about the show now. I can’t get enough of Tony Soprano! Such an amazing show.

envymesammi 1 point

YAS i feel the same way about that show. So glad you enjoyed it. The theories on the end are my favorite videos/articles to watch/read if you can't get enough still :)

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SaintPaddy 4 points

Where did you buy this monster?

envymesammi 2 points

A place called Firewater in Crest Hill, IL!

gracecase 2 points

Grew up in Joliet, is Dragon Light still there? They had the best egg rolls from my childhood and I have never been able to find them anywhere else.

Edit: Oh yea, this looks tasty too! I miss the food from home so much!

envymesammi 1 point

Yeah dragon light is still there!! I like 2 mins from there as well!! Ive never tried their eggrolls but i will for sure try them next time!

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envymesammi commented on a post in r/LSD
GoFastDoggy 43 points

Psychedelics are fun but it didn't fix anything long term.

Still required a light anti-depressant.

Lsd made my anxiety shoot through the roof, never did much for depression.

Only ones that have really worked is mushrooms. I've done psychedelics over 100+ times and just wish to inform people that psychedelics aren't the key to being fixed, they can help change mindset or lift depression for a few days to a week, but definitely wasn't a fix and this is coming from someone who tried psychedelics to fix depression, do too many psychedelics and it'll leave you whacked out.

Believe me or not, you'll find out eventually. They're great for reflecting on but whenever depression symptoms recurr so often, it's a sign psychedelics only cease it for a short bit.

100% not a cure and could leave other people worse off

First couple times I did psychedelics it was a gods gift to the world and fixed depression for a few months, anymore mushrooms can lift it and allow me to reflect butbthis whole meme of it curing depression or anxiety is bullshit, mines on the severe end though.

envymesammi 16 points

100% not a cure and could leave other people worse off

Completely agree.

I developed a personality disorder that LSD largely contributed to. I loved LSD while I was able to do it, and it was a great experience every time I did, but overall did not improve my mental health outside out the trip at all.

wytai 11 points

Which personality disorder? And why do you think LSD contributed to it?

envymesammi 2 points

Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). I am also bipolar, which is hard to seperate from BPD sometimes since their symptoms are very similar. While I'm not saying LSD was the main factor in why I developed BPD, it definitely brought it to the surface..

I would go incredibly manic outside of the trip, do and say things I normally wouldn't and eventually threw me into such a deep depression/manic state that I started to disassociate and do things I couldn't remember, etc. While looking back, I definitely displayed a lot of the symptoms of BPD but they didn't get called into question until after starting to do LSD.

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Arma420 5 points

Man, that's really cool! Is drawing a hobby of yours? I'd sure like to see more

envymesammi 4 points

Thank you! I paint more than anything but I keep a drawing journal for when I can't sleep! I'll post more for sure haha

Gregtaylor101 0 points

Really nice work. Shame no colour though

envymesammi 2 points

I'm doing both my sleeves black and grey, and my legs all in color!

Gregtaylor101 2 points

Sounds good. Thats some serious ink! You'll have to post pics when finished. I'm all colour but its just down to personal taste

envymesammi 1 point

I definitely will! And totally understand that, haha. I definitely enjoy color! One of my favorite pieces on my leg is a color portrait of Lana Del Rey, lol.

Edit: laba to lana

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envymesammi commented on a post in r/AskReddit
envymesammi 2 points

I am okay. I'm still awake because I can't sleep from worrying so much. It's 2:35 am where I live, and I feel like I have lost everyone in my life who's mattered to me in such a short amount of time. I haven't talked to anyone offer then my boyfriend and the people at work in months.

I used to have so many friends. I'm not too sure what happened..

feedyourpigeons 1 point

Maybe you can reach out to them to meet for lunch? And you may have anxiety, so if this continues perhaps see a doctor. I hope this gets resolved :)

envymesammi 2 points

I have BPD, which also stems from having severe anxiety. It's more so I just stopped talking to everyone because I was just sick of putting in all of the effort and getting none in return. None of my old friends have tried to reach me since I have stopped getting in touch with them a month or two ago.

I have been seeing a therapist and doctor for some time ans just recently have gotten meds, so I hope it helps too. Thank you for your kind reply :)

envymesammi commented on a post in r/AskReddit
envymesammi 3 points

For me, it's a constant state of worry. Mainly gets worse when I'm with other people. It tends to lead to me constantly asking them "are you good/okay/feeling fine" to reassure myself there not having a bad time hanging out or something, and then getting anxious thinking about how I must be annoying them by asking so much even though they just told me they don't mind me asking, and it's just a vicious cycle. Recently it's become the people closest to me are starting to just get annoyed with asking and that's causing me to get even more anxious wondering what it's like to try and fix it.

When I'm alone it's just constantly thinking. About anything and everything. Mainly worrying about things I don't need to be worrying about. I have borderline personality disorder and sometimes my anxiety gets so bad it causes me to disassociate from anywhere between 10 minutes to 8 or 9 hours at a time, randomly, with no indication that it's happened until I/someone else snaps me out of it.

My hands and feet are in cold sweats 99% of the time, and any tint anyone says anything remotely sounding like something is wrong (tone of voice, texting me something like "hey can i ask you something/talk to you about something, gasps outloud with no indication of why they did, facial expressions, etc) my heart instantly feels like it's going to literally beat out of my chest and it feels as if someone pitched me straight in the stomach.

TLDR; Anxiety is fucking awful and it quite literally has been ruining my social/personal life, and my mental health since I was 13 (I'm 23 now.)

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About envymesammi

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    October 13, 2017

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