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khaleesi_onthatbeat commented on a post in r/hsp
khaleesi_onthatbeat 1 point

I think this is more of an insecurity issue, not a "pent-up love energy issue" - I would try to channel that energy and love into yourself - self care, take yourself out "on dates" doing things you like and enjoying them, working out and being more active, picking up a new hobby etc. Eventually you'll be so self-absorbed when you hear your non-single friends talk about their activities you won't feel resentment towards them for it.

Shadows23 1 point

Well I can honestly say alcohol can bring out the worst in people...even people who are the most gentle kind hearted people can become violent aggressors when pushing down alcohol. No I don't think it's an excuse, because if you know you behave this way, completely out of control when you drink, then don't get drunk, at least not around anyone.

These guys I'm sure get stupid when they drink, since you seem to imply they are "normally so respectful". I'm sure with drink comes lowered sensibility and a lack of respect in this case.

I don't think and won't sit here and say they are just total losers who don't actually respect women, I will say they are being influenced by alcohol, hormones and feeding off of each other's drunkenness.

It may be true that the real you comes out when you're drunk, but if you aren't drinking then you aren't that person. So no I don't think they're bad people, I think they need to stop drinking, if what it leads to is the same cat calling and disrespectful behavior they try and shield you from.

That said there is a chance they actually don't respect women, and you are simply the unicorn in all of this because they are close to you. I do feel, even when they are drinking however, having a girl like you there to tell them they are being inappropriate and doing to these women the exact thing they're ready to fight men for over you should stop them from doing that, and not just that night when you say it, but every night from then on.

Sadly I don't believe your friends have what it takes, mostly the desire, to control their drinking so they won't turn into heathens.

So you have to decide whether this behavior is worth losing your friends over, or if you will have a serious talk with them about how it is disrespectful and is causing even you to lose respect for them...and it's making you feel a little betrayed like they seem so upstanding yet they are doing the same low life stuff as the men that hit on you.

I'm sorry you're in this situation, as I can imagine it would be hard to have to sit and swallow that type of gross misconduct when they are drunk and you are with them, but I also know it would be hard to lose all your friends. I hope you figure it out, love.

khaleesi_onthatbeat [score hidden]

Yeah their drinking can get a bit out of control. They don't become aggressive or behave dangerously or threateningly to other women, they just act like stupid little boys, trying to puff up their egos with each other and pull cheesy pick up lines on girls on a dare to see if they can "charm" their way into getting phone numbers. And when one of my friends yells at some girl like "hey there beautiful where you going!?" and she looks at him with disgust (as i would too) I feel embarrassed to be right there next to him, like I've betrayed that woman's sense of security too... even if I smack him on the head after he does something so stupid like that she's already made her impression.

If they don't actually respect women then I don't know what makes me so special. It would make sense if I was one of the guys' girlfriends or wives I guess but that's not the case, I'm just their bro but with tits and a lack of a dick and I smell better. lol

champagne_insecurity 3 points

They're sexually harassing women

khaleesi_onthatbeat [score hidden]

i know it's harassment, that's why it bothers me and I don't know how call them out on it in a way that will make them feel shitty enough about it to stop doing it because it's 1) not okay and 2) hypocritical because they hate it when other guys bother me

khaleesi_onthatbeat 1 point

Thanks!

EndTrophy 1 point

The trick your friend does is dependent on positioning and urgency. Sometimes with that trick you can just let it go though your legs to another teammate as a pass without touching even. Most tricks upon receiving a pass are done as a first touch to conserve ball/play momentum/redirect+snake eye, or control the ball off an awkward pass/in an awkward position. These can be very simple, if you've seen Zidane play you'll notice that well-executed, light one touches are a highlight of his skill, where he might just stick his toe out low to the ground and flick an incoming pass over or around an opponent behind him. You've seen that with your friend's trick that she was very unpredictable with a one touch off a pass because she didn't make time to control the ball for you to respond. For this I'd work on one touch skill and vision/awareness.

khaleesi_onthatbeat 1 point

Hmmm i wish i could get a video clip of my friend so you guys knew what I was talking about.

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khaleesi_onthatbeat commented on a post in r/EatCheapAndHealthy
xx-shalo-xx 31 points

6 euro for two weeks? welcome to the rice fields motherfucker, cause that's all you're gonna eat. /s

khaleesi_onthatbeat 1 point

Rice eggs and kimchi errday for meeeeeee

Vicious_Mockery 40 points

Definitely make a trip to your local food bank, they can at least get you through the week

khaleesi_onthatbeat 2 points

Don’t have one.

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khaleesi_onthatbeat commented on a post in r/korea
dumbwaeguk 1 point

By this logic, JAV is responsible for every sexual crime you can think of.

khaleesi_onthatbeat 2 points

To some degree, I blame the entire pornography industry not just JAV for having an influence to a lot of the violent sex crimes that happen all over the world. There is no inherent consent involved in that shit.

dumbwaeguk 1 point

you're going to need some evidence if you want me to side with your angry frustration

khaleesi_onthatbeat 2 points

All the rape and gangbang and violent affressive porn out there is all about taking control over the girl without her explicit permission. Grabbing, pushing, pulling, cornering, forcing to do things against their will, being filmed without knowing about it ....and guys get off on that and it’s disgusting. Yes you can argue that she’s acting, signed a contract and agreed to film something like that (I won’t get into the details about the corruption and abuse that does go on behind the scenes) but what you see on your screen is not consent. And there’s no negative consequence of that action except pleasure and entertainment that would indicate to any viewer that actually that kind of behavior is wrong and requires explicit mutual consent between sexual partners.

Or if that’s what you think consent looks like then you need to re-evaluate yourself.

Media affects how you perceive the world and interact with it, so you can’t tell me that porn has absolutely no effect on what kind of behavior some people believe is acceptable in real life or not.

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khaleesi_onthatbeat commented on a post in r/xxfitness
xtina_a_gorilla 86 points

I agree with other posters that elite level athletes will likely have the body types that best suit their sports. You’ll see it even before that level in schools where someone with height will get selected to be on the basketball team over someone who is short and in most cases, will be better at that sport.

Anyway, I’ve been fascinated by these photos lately and it seems relevant to your post. When I look for my “ideal” body type, it’s interesting to see what sports the athletes do.

khaleesi_onthatbeat 2 points

No soccer, tennis, lacrosse, hockey, powerlifting, softball, crossfit, taekwondo, karate, mma, ski/s or boarding athletes on this list though...

khaleesi_onthatbeat commented on a post in r/college
khaleesi_onthatbeat 1 point

My tuition is around the equivalent to 3,500 USD per semester so 7,000 USD per year. Add in basic living expenses as my rent, utilities, food budget, phone and internet, books, medical fees, other needs, etc, it adds up to approximately 20,000 a year.

I’m paying everything out of pocket working minimum wage with immigration law limitations on the amount of hours i’m allowed to work during a semester so i’m dying lol

khaleesi_onthatbeat commented on a post in r/xxfitness
khaleesi_onthatbeat 1 point

I can’t relate with having toddlers, but I am 28 and ridiculously busy and struggle a lot with balancing my life and activity and SANITY at the same time as well and just want you to know that feeling overwhelmed like this is totally okay and feeling like you want/need to do EVERYTHING and being disappointed or tired and frustrated because you get burnt out and can’t is also a valid feeling.

I’m still a full-time university student, undergrad. Everyone else is my “child” because i’m the mature upperclassman who knows everything so i’m always being asked to help friends and colleagues with their shit. I have a full courseload, a lot of reading and assignments to do and I juggle everything in my life in 5 different languages now, each of varying proficiency and requiring studying as well.

I also pay my own way through school and living expenses out of my own pocket, so I juggle 2 part-time minimum wage jobs and weekly tutoring.

Top it off with having some sense of a social life, but on an insanely low budget, keeping my apartment clean and organized, laundry washed, skin moisturized, eyebrows tweezed, bed made and some sleep...having decently healthy food in my fridge and cupboard, meal prep so i can eat healthier and have my food stash on me throughout the day while i’m running around with my backpack, gym bag and bag of food everywhere.

All this while I like to hit the gym first thing in the morning before school 4-5x per week, and have soccer practice 2-3x per week at night after work and tournaments on weekends.

I have an autoimmune disorder as well which sometimes leaves me completely drained and fatigued so much that I just need to take time for myself and shut everything and everybody out.

Sacrifices sometimes have to be made, so i might skip the gym to get more sleep or wake up and work on an assignment instead. I might volunteer to not play in a tournament so i can study or pick up some extra hours at work. I set boundaries when these little young people are coming to me for help and taking care of them cause they are still helpless. Sometimes my coursework gets put on the back burner and i slack behind, and have to catch up by skipping a class or shutting myself in on the weekend or coming up with ways i can study on the go.

When you make those sacrifices, understand your reasoning behind them and try (i know, easier said than done!) to forgive yourself and not give yourself a hard time for not being perfect and having everything all worked out perfectly. We’re just humans.

khaleesi_onthatbeat commented on a post in r/learn_arabic
samthesquirtle 2 points

Start highlighting from the end of the text and do it backwards. Because Arabic is written right to left, this tends to work for me. I’d try this and see if it works for you in PDF, it works for me in any format usually.

khaleesi_onthatbeat 3 points

I second this. Highlighting Arabic text from the right side tends to get all of it

khaleesi_onthatbeat commented on a post in r/relationships
khaleesi_onthatbeat 1 point

Move to a new apartment or find new roommates.

You are by no means obligated in any way to cook for these guys or teach them how to cook either. Even if they pay you for it I see it as disrespectful because they don’t see you as their roommate, you are their food delivery service. If you’re a student you don’t have time to deal with that and have your own responsibilities too.

Now, if you whip up some pasta and veggies and you do share and they compliment, you can subtly offer to teach them once in a way that makes it seem like it was their own idea, so they can make it for themselves when they want to eat it. But don’t make a open offer to teach them some cooking skills or meals or grocery shopping etc cause they’ll just take advantage of that.

khaleesi_onthatbeat commented on a post in r/Professors
khaleesi_onthatbeat 27 points

Hm but when men request their students to call them “doctor” instead of “mister” it’s no big deal and not considered “trashy” at all...? They just are excused for having just an inflated ego because they worked hard for that phd...well so did anyone else who got their phd. so i don’t see any problem if you are in a position of authority to have a right to want to be addressed in a way that you prefer.

If you want to be called mrs, dr, miss, or referred by your first name or even a nickname, thats your right and students should respect that. A student who calls you mrs. by mistake and you say “hey, its okay, but i’d prefer to be addressed as Doctor X instead” then the student should respect that wish.

I think even if you’re not in a position of power everyone has the right to be called by the name they prefer to be called.

The student retorting that such a request implies you being ashamed of your husband is incredibly rude and a personal attack. You have no need to explain yourself to them in that case but can draw a line by stating that your relationship with your husband is none of her business and how you request to be addressed in your working professional environment is completely unrelated.

We don’t address sergeants or captains in the military or on board a ship or in a team by mister or their first name and don’t make a big deal about addressing them by their title, so what’s the difference?

khaleesi_onthatbeat commented on a post in r/xxfitness
khaleesi_onthatbeat 1 point

5’0” - my highest RECORDED weight was 74kg as of 2015. (which I think is like 163ish pounds?)

I was never a skinny girl but i was active (played soccer all year round, lots of backpacking/hiking/climbing with scouts in the summers, and marching band all throughout high school)

What did me in was completely stopping being active when I went to college, had ridiculous sleeping schedule, drank a lot and smoked a lot (and thus snacked ALOT) and i think i put on more than the typical “freshman 15”...

I dropped out of college after 2.5 years, lost some weight from working waitressing all day long and then gradually restarted being more active around 2011~2012. Started running with couch25k and did a couple jillian michaels and insanity home workouts in the evenings after work. in 2013 when I moved abroad I had gone from super overweight/fat to around 58kg.

I gained weight and was up to 73kg because my fitness lifestyle kinda got pushed aside again and i had a boyfriend who liked eating out.

Had a really traumatic summer in 2014 and dropped down to 67 kg in a month from stress. I fluctuated between 67~64kg up until this year and had started lifting and playing soccer again in my new university as of 2016. I started lifting mostly to help me get in better shape for soccer but I have in the last year incorporated more isometric and accessory exercises for building not just strength and power as a soccer player but for aesthetic development as well. when I started trying to take my diet more seriously, but not TOO seriously (i have a history with ED so strictly counting calories is counterproductive for me) i saw my weight drop gradually as I also very gradually reduced body fat and increased muscle mass.

So now i’m sitting around 61kg and I look a lot better than I did when I was 58 because i’ve got more lean muscle mass in better places and less baby fat in my face. I look alright but I still carry quite a bit of excess body fat in my upper thighs/hips, lower belly and back of my arms...

My goal is to get to a minimum 54kg maybe by next year and down to around 20% bf but that all depends on my bf distribution and muscle growth.

I’m currently able to sprint 30meters in under 6 seconds and run up to 8km at a steady pace without stopping as long as my playlist is good ;)

even after 2 quad injuries on the pitch I am able to squat and DL my bodyweight, which for me is a big deal cause progress lately has been slow. Currently I have deloaded to work on getting a deeper squat depth, and changing to a routine with more reps and sets and a slightly lower weight. Taking the time to tighten up my form in the process.

My biggest problem is my pants. I still prefer to wear high-waist to cover my lower belly and make my legs look longer, BUT NOTHING FITS MY BUTT AND THIGHS AND ALSO MY WAIST. so i have a lot of ripped/ruined or completely loose pants/jeans lol

khaleesi_onthatbeat commented on a post in r/xxfitness
khaleesi_onthatbeat 1 point

A home workout program like Jillian michaels, couch25k, BBG by Kayla Itsines might be a good place to start. Just getting active but having a scheduled program to follow without rly having to go outside until youre ready. It’s weird that there are so many people going through bad breakups lately...

khaleesi_onthatbeat commented on a post in r/xxfitness
khaleesi_onthatbeat 2 points

Also: in the first couple weeks i randomly started a huge paint by numbers project. I used to he artsy but i lost my flair from lack of practice and having to become a more logical and hard-thinker and life just sort of squishing my creativity.

But what was nice about this paint by numbers was that it was HUGE, like 40x55cm, and so detailed. I spent 6 hours in my pajamas on the floor next to my bed just doing it and focusing on it helped keep my mind occupied even when i didn’t feel like leaving my room. Then when i finally finished it, i had this nice beautiful painting to hang on my wall and it was somewhat cathartic and brought me a small sense of closure.

The painting was the balloon house from up too, so it kind of reminded me of flying away to new and great adventures, and like Carl overcame his anger and frustration at the world over the loss of his wife, made new friends and stuff, so too can I overcome and see all the color the world has in it.

Maybe diving into an art or DIY project might help, if you’re into that sort of thing.

Me, i’ve found a new hobby in the process.

GetOffMySheet 8 points

That's a sub?! Thank you!

khaleesi_onthatbeat 1 point

Yeah as soon as i saw that i went and subscribed. Needed this!

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khaleesi_onthatbeat commented on a post in r/xxfitness
nochedetoro 208 points

That’s why you marry an ass man cries in pancake

khaleesi_onthatbeat 14 points

took me a moment to understand this comment lol

how exactly does one cry in pancake tho

noiant 12 points

cry while eating pancakes? hopefully that's it. that's my life's goal.

khaleesi_onthatbeat 2 points

Cry from pancake happiness yes

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khaleesi_onthatbeat commented on a post in r/xxfitness
misskateykates 10 points

I've been holding off on buying clothes for so long convinced I don't want to invest much in case I outgrow (ungrow?) them too quickly and waste money. Haven't lost drastic weight or anything, just nothing really fits well/looks good and its time--I'm basically walking around in rags!

khaleesi_onthatbeat 3 points

i'm just too broke to buy new clothes. just threw away two pairs of jeans so i guess i'll be wearing leggings and cheap baggy tunics and sweaters this winter lol thank god i'm a uni student and can get away with having shit fashion and i'm single again so i don't need to worry about dressing nice for dates and shit

khaleesi_onthatbeat 3 points

ah dammit because of the time zone difference I missed fail friday. So I'm just gonna put it here because i need to let it out lol

So on Monday I hit the gym and trained legs and was doing fine. 2nd to last exercise was hip thrusts on the smith machine.

Well I guess I was really tired and completely out of it because in my third set I noticed that even though I was changing to heavier plates it didn't seem to get any heavier. At first I was like dayum my glutes must be super awesome now!

and then I realized that when I changed plates for my 3rd set I just completely forgot to put plates on both sides and was lifting with plates on only one side, and not noticing any imbalance because its the smith machine.

whoops.

khaleesi_onthatbeat commented on a post in r/college
khaleesi_onthatbeat 2 points

I'm 28 and still in undergrad. Sometimes I have to remind myself like this post that I just am going my own path and that I'll get there when I do. But then I remember that I also dream of finishing graduate school. but also having a family. and like as a female with some health problems its going to be incredibly difficult for me to have kids past age 35. And I should have my career established by then so that i'm paying off my debt and living a stable life that can support a family and also because companies aren't gonna hire you fresh out of school and then turn around and just give you maternity leave. And even so all that requires having a spouse to have kids with too, which means having time to date and get married, which means not being a miserable student who works and studies all the time....so i get stressed about the timeline very often and feel like at some point, I'm going to have to choose between having a normal "family life" or my academic aspirations and doing what i need to do to establish the career i want to have.

GrimsterrOP 5 points

Someone do the math on that pls

khaleesi_onthatbeat 6 points

there's nothing wrong here. The student he tutored spent 15 years of his life on and off going to school because of visa problems. He could have been in his 4th or 5th year when he was receiving tutoring, he may have been a graduate student at the time getting tutoring for English or another requisite course. Then within 8 years later he's hired in that same university to do research and teach courses so he's essentially a "professor." Thats when the poster goes back to school (finishing undergrad, finishing a masters? who knows) and happens to be taking a course taught by him cause they probably originally met because they were in the same deparment.

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About khaleesi_onthatbeat

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