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I did a small presentation on this topic for an applied linguistics course and discovered that the stereotypical “gay” dialect that a lot of people are familiar is actually derived from imitating the southern Californian variety of female speech, where there were originally many open communities of gay men. There are certain words and expressions used exclusively in the community because of circus and theatrical communities that often had many gay performers and crew members. Its not a new concept at all but has been around for at least 80 years.

Someone said that its like a male’s attempt at imitating a woman’s speech tendencies - higher pitch, more nasal, exaggerated and emotive annunciation and tones, using terms of endearment or address used mainly by women such as “girl/sister/bitch/honey” ...

Its interesting though because this stereotypical variety seems less like an imitation of most women and more like a caricature.

It seems to me that similar equivalents exist in other languages. I couldnt come up witt specific examples at the moment though.

Original Poster31 points · 16 hours ago

Makes sense! It's sad - a lack of exercise exacerbates my mental health issues, but my mental health issues make it hard for me to exercise.

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This. I’ve been dealing with depression foe a few weeks and my lifts have suffered and I’ve been skipping the gym more frequently. And this happens a lot so i KNOW in my mind that if i just GET UP AND GO i’ll feel a lot better and more confident, get out of my apartment but for some reason i just can’t. And then i end up having a mental breakdown every other day holed up in my room, and i know its getting worse only because i’m not getting out and getting that workout in.

I just don’t want to do anything. Yay depression.

There really isn't much tracking suicides, unless you want to time them.

One of my favorite ways to train suicides is to run 1 suicide for each free throw missed at the end of each practice.

My high school coach used to do this with the whole team. We'd line up on the baseline, and each person had five free throws to shoot. If that person misses, the team runs. It became REALLY hard to make free throws because you are often crazy tired.

To do this solo:

At the end of practice, shoot X amount of free throws. If you are super good at free throws, the number you shoot should be higher. Each time you miss, run a suicide. Do this until you reach X amount of free throws thrown. Over time, you'll not only notice how much better your cardio / sprint skills are but you'll also notice how shooting free throws when your tired aren't such a big deal anymore. Your % will go up. If you watch any high school ball free throw % often drops in the fourth quarter due to players getting gassed.

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My soccer coach has us work on basic first touch and trapping drills immediately after interval sprints and the reason why is because he said it actually helps us focus more on the form and motion while we’re already tired, which is expected in a game-situation. The first few times suck but then after a while you realize you’ve gotten better and ball control is actually improved. And when it gets too easy you just do more. Plus keeps your heart rate up so good for conditioning and leaning out.

E V E R Y coach ended practice with suicides.

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Soccer too.

Oh man that is so creepy and rude! Sorry that you had to go through that, but at least you learned something from it! I hope that dude got fired wtf man.

Hell, I'm so bad at saying no and quit a gym once because a trainer was unable to take a hint. But in my head, the situation go something like this:

"I appreciate that it's your job to try to convince people to use your services, but please do not continue to pressure me into something I've said multiple times I don't want to do. My reasons are my reasons, and they're actually none of your business. My answer is no, and frankly I'm uncomfortable that you don't respect that."

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this is nicer than what i suggested. but yeah, i wouldn't want to work with someone who tries to nag and pressure or guilt-trip me into signing up with them. that's just walking right into an abusive relationship

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119 points · 1 day ago · edited 1 day ago

I'm about to sound like a real asshole, but....it really irks me when I see posts that are like, "how do you stop eating when _____?" "how do you get up early to go to the gym?" JUST DO IT.

There might be a few tips but those are all basically common sense. Accept that there is no magic answer to your question that will make things easy breezy. Is it hard sometimes? Yeah. Is it uncomfortable sometimes? Yes. Will it always be? Yeah, probably, you just think about it less after a while. Bed will probably ALWAYS feel better than waking up at 430 to work out. Eating delicious, crappy food will pretty much always feel great in the moment!

No one is going to make your choices for you. If you know that eating something/not getting up to work out/WHATEVER goes against your goals, just. don't. do. it. Yes, you'll be hungry sometimes, and yes, you'll be tired sometimes. Yes, it is hard. You can do hard things. You can handle it. Seriously.

Edit to add: I like the discussion about latent vs acute motivation. And one my favorite analogies for this: I am an adult so I pay my rent every month. My latent motivation for this is to not get evicted from my apartment. I don't think about this motivation. It's just there. Do I have acute motivation to pay my rent? Does it make me feel really awesome every time? Fuck no. There is no magical "rent-paying-high" that I get to experience after I pay my rent. I am an adult and sometimes as an adult you have to do not fun things.

Similarly, I don't get a ~*~high~*~ every time I work out, or even most of the times I work out. It just is. I trust that what may really suck in the moment is good for my goals in the long run, whether it be paying rent or working out at 5 am.

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you have a point but for many people just starting out, or coming back after a long break, or like me - coming from a team sport to training alone and having to adjust to being self-accountable is a big lifestyle change. Most people don't see going to the gym or waking up early to eat breakfast as an obligatory thing to survival like paying the rent is. It's an optional thing. Something that many people can live fine without doing, and something that people can choose not to do without suffering severe immediate consequences. I say immediate, like getting evicted after avoiding paying rent for 3 months. versus avoiding the gym for 3 months.

Like yes, you have to JUST DO IT. but to a person who's never done it, that's asking a lot. So mostly when they ask these questions they are asking for how to go about the process of changing their mindset about working out being an option to being as necessary and normal as morning coffee or brushing one's teeth or paying the rent, even if doing so can be inconvenient or a hassle at times.

I went through a period of obsession with the gym, where i would make big sacrifices just to make gym time. Like sacrificing sleep, eating, social time, studying time to work extra hours so i can make the month's rent - i would do the same thing but go to the gym. In my opinion it's not healthy to see working out as obligatory but something we choose to do because we enjoy it, and something we choose to do do to reach certain goals even when we don't enjoy it once in a while because we know that those goals will bring us joy as well. We're raised on a instant-satisfaction culture so it's hard to be patient for weightloss or gains goals as opposed to studying really hard for a test, and then getting the test results a week later.

4 points · 1 day ago

I get what you’re saying but I think that’s a little different than the questions I’m talking about. “How do you get up early and work out?” You set your alarm and you do it. “How do you stop eating when you’re watching tv/reading/at work?“ You just...don’t put the food in your mouth. Nothing anyone here says will make it easier. It’s not EASY, but it really is that simple.

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Some people set their alarm but still cant force themselves to get up early and go workout. Think about it, when you first wake up how cognitively alert are you to remember to do something that you don’t normally do or prioritize. Maybe someone is able to do it for a couple days, but because of the anxiety of remembering to wake up and do it they actually arent getting a restful night of sleep. A few days later, sore, exhausted, its so much easier to give in and hit snooze.

What you have to tell them is what to do after that. They hate themselves for sleeping in a couple days and missing workouts so they give up. Because unfortunately, people around us, on this sub, and on social media show us that its such a habit its second nature to get up and throw on your gym clothes and walk out the door despite the weather, despite how well rested you feel, despite your health or the billions of things you have to worry about after the gym. Everyone makes it look easy and then says “just do it. Its not easy but its simple.”

Well i don’t think its simple. And the people looking for answers arent looking for generalized simple answers. They wanna know what to prepare themselves for. Because not everyone can keep motivating themselves based on sheer willpower alone.

I truly believe a lot less people would give up so easily if they had a better idea of what to expect, and how to deal with the situations that occur before they happen and they’ve already experienced the negative effects of missing a workout, feeling disappointed in themselves or anxious about others, dissatisfied with lack of faster results. No one has ever broken it down bit by bit.

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I was at Costco last night minding my own business when these two out of shape gym bros walked by. They stared at me and then did a double take. Okay, rude. Then they said something to each other about me and began laughing. RUDE!

I'm sure it was about my upper body as that's all they could see. I was wearing a tank top. I'm a size 4 but my shoulders/arms/back are pretty well defined. It really unsettled me, so much so that I cried in my car on the way home.

And now I am going to continue my quest to look hot and scary and look like a dude. Fuck you, guys! I'm just gonna get bigger.

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you don't look like a dude. you look like a strong girl. and those dudes look like weak assholes.

I really hate this type of language. a girl with muscles doesn't look like a man. I mean, how many men out there in the world are scrawny and skinny or fat and squishy and not muscular? Do we not call them men, then?

I really hate this type of language. a girl with muscles doesn't look like a man. I mean, how many men out there in the world are scrawny and skinny or fat and squishy and not muscular? Do we not call them men, then?

You said this so smartly and articulately. THIS. ALL DAY LONG! I live in a huge city with millions of people and other than my gym, I RARELY see men with any muscles at all. Fuck them is right. The only men who ever have anything negative to say about my body are men who are totally and completely out of shape and doughy.

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if a guy dares to say about a muscular woman "ew, she looks like a man" you can point out how she doesnt look like him at all, and say "well then what does that make you?" if he does happen to be a surly guy...i gotta think of a better comeback that isnt laced with gender slurs besides "mind your own ball sweat"

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yeah, i feel you on this. During the semester i had the excuse of not having enough time to fit in more, and because i was working and running around school (i had the best schedule - 3 back to back classes on completely opposite sides of campus every day whoop) i was still getting plenty of activity aside from 2x per week soccer practice, bi monthly tournaments, and hitting the gym maybe 4 days a week for about an hour of lifting.

Now that i have more free time - i do a lot more sitting around. and then i drag myself to the gym and workout for 2 hours, really focus on my lifts instead of cramming a bunch of supersets in before i had to run to classes like i did during the last semester... I'll do a whole extra hour of cardio on top of it. I am trying to cut fat, so that's not a bad idea. except the extra sitting. and the seasonal depression. and the heat making me too lazy to eat until i cant stand it anymore and then i eat all the things and because i'm doing more cardio i eat all the things AND some. so cut is going really swell, in case you were wondering.

always feel like i'm never doing enough with all things in my life. I'm not working out enough. I'm not disciplined enough. i'm not studying enough. I'm not sacrificing enough. i'm not giving myself enough. i love it.

i'm not in a good place right now myself so i wish i could be more helpful. but just know you're not the only one.

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It’s pretty straightforward. I’m getting better at not eating everything in sight but i have a different problem now:

I’ll spend all my money (and i’m broke af and shouldnt be spending money on food at all and eating what random crap i do have) on food...and start stuffing myself. But then i recognize fullness cues or manage to stop and tell myself i dont need to eat anymore.

But then there i am with -20$ and a pile of food that i shouldnt be eating at all. Some of it i could save for later i suppose but some of it i cant.

I’d honestly rather binge on an entire rice cooker full of cooked rice that o spent no extra funds on than binge spending my money on food i will stop myself from eating. Not only is it a waste of food but also my precious money.

I literally just impulsively spent 25$ i have kept aside for my electricity bill on fucking delivery mcdonalds. I bought enough food for 3 people but only ate one serving like a normal person, which is great and all....but not i have all this food and a lot less money.

All just to satisfy a craving and then my brain shutting off while i clicked on stuff to order. This isnt the first time i’ve done it either.

Does anyone else have this problem? How to stop it???

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Does anyone have a rough idea of the percentage difference to metabolism/TDEE made by (idk) a typical dose of antipsychotic + (same of) lithium? Partner is trying to cut down from 220ish lbs. He’s averaging 2000 a day, should be losing something. (He can’t cut too low because it screws with his moods in a way no one enjoys. Will be upping cardio for sure.)

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i don't think it should make any significant difference to metabolism.

Wow, learned something new

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I am currently in my 5th year of University. The reason why it's my 5th year is because i'm unable to take extra credits or summer/winter classes due to also having 3 part time jobs just to barely support myself. I'm an international student, and the minimum wage where I live/study is shit and i'm paying for everything on my own. No scholarships, no loans, no financial support from anyone else. So it's been really tough.

As a result my GPA is just average. Nothing extraordinary. Not to mention that half of my courses are taught in my 2nd language, so it's not even easy to get a good grade in the course if one just studied the material really well. If i could take the same courses in English, I'd have a better chance of getting A's. But my limitations in expressing myself in essays or catching terms and specific material during lectures due to the language barrier make it a double effort than the regular students just to pass the class because i essentially have to study everything twice over in both languages - which takes up a lot of time as well.

So as i'm looking at my CV/Resume, I'm feeling really depressed. All of my work experience is in retail, bartending, tutoring...all the part-time jobs I've ever been able to do since I turned 20. I can't get any related work-experience, no undergraduate research positions at my school (they don't pay and demand a ridiculous amount of time commitment, it's practically slavery) or internships. My field is linguistics and cognitive neuroscience - so not exactly popular either.

I have no statistics skills, no computer language skills, and I have a lot of self-studying to do as it is during the summer just to prepare for graduation exams, language qualification exams, and I need to use my free time to work my ass off to save as much money as possible because i don't have the time (or legal right, technically) to work as many hours during the semester.

I'm stressing out because if i send my resume to an employer or for grad school applications - they are gonna take 2 seconds to look at it, and they will throw it away because it's beyond nothing special. My GPA isn't stellar and I have no applicable working experience. If i want to get into Grad school admissions committees aren't going to care about how many years I spent making sandwiches or shaking cocktails and dealing with children. They won't even give me the chance to explain my situation to them because my CV is so terrible.

so now i'm panicking about what value my life has and what all this was worth when it feels like I've just dug myself into a huge pit by having to work so much and put aside focusing on my studies and building myself as a skilled and marketable person who could actually contribute to society...

I'm going to be 30 when i finally graduate from undergrad. I am a woman who wants to date and someday have a family too so i have my damn biological clock playing against me as well. I have health problems so if i tried to have kids past age 35 there would be major complications.

I feel like i have 2 choices: 1) sacrifice my happiness and forget ever getting married and having my own kids so that i can focus on excelling academically and establish my career and for once make at least enough money that can support myself without living off scraps.

2) sacrifice having a career and academic success so that i can have a social life and actually be able to build meaningful relationships with people and start my own family.

I really wanted to go to grad school, but looking at my experience and grades nobody is going to want me, and even if by some miracle someone did, i wouldn't be qualified as any other student in the field because i am stupid and know nothing. No lab or real research experience, no statistics or computer skills, not even the right basal degree track...it seems so hopeless and I'm just so exhausted of living like this and i don't see the point.

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16 comments

As per our last 15 conversations, this is the point at which I throw up my hands and do something else with my time

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Original Poster0 points · 4 days ago

Wow you’re so helpful much thanks i feel so reassured now, really.

I’m obviously right then. I’ve got nothing going for me.

dude, it's not my job to persuade you that you have value. eventually you have to learn to self-soothe.

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Original Poster0 points · 3 days ago

Well if no one else believes it how the hell am i supposed to

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Original Poster1 point · 4 days ago

Thats exactly what i thought too. I was like whaaaaaaa kickbacks help grow your booty so much

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funny because i'm pretty sure 5 years ago every women's lifestyle magazine and pinterest post was telling us that kickbacks are the way to go if you want a nice derriere that will get all the men hollering!

Her name is Shannon.

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This is actually more disappointing. We can forgive men for being ignorant and stupid because hashtag patriarchy and having different body compositions and so sometimes their ignorance can be understood as just stupidity. but when other women are forcibly spreading information like this - she can share her fitness tips for the type of woman who wants a different body type - but she shouldn't do it in a way that shames other women who might have different goals, or phrase it in a way that the only reason to get into fitness is to look attractive to someone or fit into a certain body type. We should be supporting each other.

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I’ve had this happen, when they are particularly dry and the air is really dusty. Since my eyes are dry i’m less aware of the irritation from the dust until i put eyedrops in, hence the burning.

I used to have some super “sticky” prescription eyedrops (ran out, cant afford more) that were really helpful in these conditions.

Except when you live in a country that heavily stigmatizes mental illness and sees depression as just something you “suck up and get over”

None of My professors gave a shit about my depression or my autoimmune disease flare ups that were enough to make it incredibly difficult to get to class but didn’t matter unless i went to the hospital, got some bullshit treatment and paid 10$ for a doctor’s note that my professor may or may not accept as an excuse.

And where i study, just trying and putting in effort is not enough. You have to be fucking brilliant or really good and memorizing and regurgitating, have perfect attendance, sit in the front and applaud the professor whenever he or she brags about their research, and do perfectly on everything or you don’t stand a chance at getting an A.

Thirsty Thursday is a waste of your time anyways. Alcohol and binge drinking is unhealthy and you’ll just get fat anyways. None of the “friends” you make at those parties wont be the ones you really need in your life. Its okay to socialize but i don’t see why its necessary to promote stupidity and irresponsibility. Take it from someone who has been there done that and 10 years later still reaping the consequences and trying to get back on track. Not worth it.

I can totally relate to number 3. I feel like a better player in general, and that my team works better together when we play against other teams that are also just as good or better than us.

What often happens when we play against teams that suck is they clump and chase after the ball. They don't keep their positions and so then what happens is so many situations where 3 opposing team members are bombarding one of my players and they can't dribble out or make a pass to the open space. Someone always gets hurt and we end up wasting a lot of energy chasing the ball and marking the players that chase the ball and all cluster to one side of the field. It's so frustrating!

Original Poster1 point · 6 days ago

Oh I see what your saying now! I think I'll try lightly active for a week and see if the weight will line up. Its much simpler to me to not add exercise calories but picking between sedentary and lightly active was confusing me haha.

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well you're walking and moving around so you're obviously not sedentary, OP!

never heard of Outdoor Voices, their stuff is cute! Too bad i'm poor >.< i would spend all my money on athletic wear if i could.

I like to call it my snack pouch.

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i have a one-pack. why have a 6-pack when you can have it all conveniently stored into one?

I lost 36 lbs 3 years ago, and have kept it off, by counting calories and only calories. If I want to eat cake for dinner I do. If I want popcorn at the movies I eat it! As long as I’m not exceeding my calorie goal I eat whatever.

I love veggies and fruits and fresh foods and do a lot of my own cooking but I also have chocolate almost every single day and when I want to indulge in some deep dish pizza or Cheetos, I do!

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how do you count it in your calories if you didn't make the food yourself? that's usually the thing that ruins it for me.

Yeah that’s the tricky thing. If a place has posted calories, I go by that. If they don’t, I try to break it down by component. For example, if I order... chicken cordon bleu. Based on the sizes of the components, I’ll enter in X oz of baked chicken breast, X oz of Swiss cheese, X oz of ham, X tablespoons of oil or butter, etc etc. Because I carefully weigh everything when I cook at home, I feel pretty confident when I have to estimate by looks. This will give me a much more accurate result than searching for “Chicken Cordon Bleu” and picking one of those.

I’ve even gone so far as to bring one of my favorite dishes home, separate the components as much as possible, then weigh that and create a custom dish in My Fitness Pal for that so that in the future when I want to eat that dish from the same restaurant, I’m confident in the calories I’m entering.

It might seem a bit crazy but I love food and want to know what I’m eating! I’m also generally not tracking as in depth because I kind of know how to eat within my TDEE without going over, but I’m trying to get a more accurate TDEE calc right now which requires me to be very accurate with my daily calorie tracking for 12 weeks to get a good estimate!

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maybe it just doesn't make sense to me because i'm such a perfectionist. I wouldn't be comfortable with just eye-guessing the weight or ingredient breakdown of something. hence why i struggle with calorie counting.

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Same. People are like, “Today’s my day off, I’m glad I don’t have to go to the gym”. I’m thinking “the days I get to go to the gym are my favorite days”. It’s my sanctuary, my meditation space. When I’m at the gym I’m the only one there, no matter how full it is.

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i hate it when stuff prevents me from going to the gym. I'll sacrifice other stuff for it. I'll call in late to work, skip class, cancel brunch with friends.....i'm such an awful person lol

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I always love reading scientific journals about things, and I'm a neuroscience geek who struggles with binge eating even still - so it's really interesting to read about and understand the bio-psychological mechanism behind this type of behavior.

The journal is here if you want to read it yourself.

But to summarize simply:

We have a neural mechanism that works when learning habits or routines and this same mechanism is also functioning during learning responses to certain stimuli (ever heard of Pavlovs dog?) There have been identified certain connections between specific regions of the brain involved in this circuit, so the researchers did tests on activity of these regions under differing conditions.

In general they concluded that there are 3 root "causes" for compuslive eating behavior: 1) habitual overeating 2) overeating to relieve a negative emotional state and 3) overeating despite aversive consequences.

The first one, habitual overeating, is simply developing a habit of eating too much through repetitive exposure until it becomes automatic. So you grow up eating large portions, unaware of noticing when you are full, or free range to snacks - it becomes habit, a learned behavior just like tying your shoes a certain way or what order you wash your body parts in the shower.

The second is similar with drug behavior - you eat something and you feel good. Comfort foods - sweets or foods that are associated with certain types of memories. Eventually you become weaker to that effect and end up feeling bad more often when you abstain from consuming the comfort food, subsequently leading you to binge on that food more frequently to deal with the emotion. Withdrawal makes you grumpy and more likely to actively seek the food which makes you feel good.

the third is overeating even with conscious and physical awareness of negative consequences. self-sabotaging. Yes, you shouldn't eat 3 hamburgers because it's bad for your heart but you do it anyway. Why? not because you don't care or have bad self-control, but because the habit of overeating and the satisfaction it brings has inhibited the mechanisms in your brain that help you with self-control and tell you when to stop.

you then have the whole issue with physiology - certain eating habits contribute to how your neural circuitry develops - which can leave you with a brain that doesn't produce enough of this or that hormone that in an otherwise 'normal" person would function differently. This is why not ALL obese people can be labeled as compulsive overeaters or compulsive overeaters are not all obese (i myself being one of those people) .

The brain is pretty adaptable and plastic, though, so you can untrain bad habits into new ones (over time) and find other methods to deal with negative emotions and become more conscious and proactive of the effects of an unhealthy diet and unhealthy relationship with food can have.

I'm not saying any of this is simple now that it's explained scientifically, though. Or that you can necessarily use excuses "oh my brain just doesn't produce enough dopamine so it doesn't matter what i eat" to permit unhealthy behaviors.... I just think it's fascinating.

It helps me to understand myself better, in some way.

So yeah. Science!

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Hope you don't mind, but I just cross post this to /r/bingeeatingdisorder because I think it could be appreciated there.

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Original Poster4 points · 6 days ago

oh yeah i had meant to post it there too but got caught up with stuff! thanks!

Original Poster1 point · 8 days ago

I'm mainly doing this for conditioning, and mental training for when I have to play two one hour games in a row of my sport. The sessions are also classes, so I can't leave halfway :(

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I understand your struggle. I'm not doing HIIT just to lose fat, but to improve my conditioning for soccer outside of practices (which are only 2x per week.) Yes, simply losing weight will help with that but we don't want to lose out on building power and strength as well! and for conditioning, if you play an intensive sport, you need to be able to keep moving for more than just 10 minutes of intervals.

I'm doing weights, then 40 minutes of HIIT 5 days a week, and then practice in the evenings 2 days a week and man am I GASSED. but i know its cause i'm not eating enough. But then i'm scared to eat more because 1) my wallet and 2) i'm trying to lose weight too dammit!

but i'm pretty sure that's the key. just eating more - and eating nutrient dense foods that give you all the energy and vitamins you need.

I would also spend more time focusing on your recovery. Getting at least 8 hours of good sleep, extra hydration - where i am it's summer and HUMID AF so i'm even taking an electrolyte drink after i train to help replenish lost ions from all that sweating. Foam rolling, deep stretching, taking rest days - help reduce inflammation and muscle soreness. A little caffeine before a training session never hurt nobody either ;-)

Oh, if this were me, I would get petty. First of all, you're a paying member of the gym, and you've broken no rules and seem to have only "offended" the meathead. Whom apparently has never had to experience tragedy or doesn't understand that going through the process of dealing with our emotions is NECESSARY for personal growth. (if he doesn't see that he isn't qualified to be a teacher, in my opinion, of any type of sport)

He may have been concerned that your negative energy was affecting other people, but as the owner of the gym - unless other people were complaining, that's not his business. And as a trainer he SHOULD be trying to talk to you about it to help you get through it, and understand what's going on with you because your "mopeyness" affects YOU as an athlete too.

I cant believe how selfish and dicky that is. You should talk to the other owner, try to lift your unwarranted "ban" - if the other guy is still a dick to you about it then you can quit, go to your university gym, and write all the nasty reviews. Get your BJJ coach in there. He'll stop sending his pupils there to train if he knows they aren't being treated well.

Maybe try to convince your friends to join another gym with you, or make new friends you can weight lift with and train BJJ with the other friends? I'm sorry that coldhearted, apathetic jerks like meathead exist. I hope someone breaks his heart or he gets some major stressful situation so everyone can give him a hard time about being too emotional. get him banned from his own damn gym. what a prick.

Original Poster1 point · 7 days ago

Ahh thank you this is what I needed to hear. I'm a perfectionist with almost everything so having to use plates feels wrong in my head but knowing so many others use them too really helps

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i completely get you on this.

i struggle with this too and since i've added more HIIT to my workouts my daily struggle with always feeling hungry just recently intensified. On top of soccer practices i'm burning upwards of 1000 calories or more per day just from exercise, so my TDEE is now close to 2800! And if i'm at home, i'm too lazy to cook something or go buy groceries (which is something I need to work on personally) i cave into eating junk or ordering take out. Or just overeating on whatever I do have. I'll inhale a ton of "clean" food if that's all I have. Where i live it's incredibly hot and humid summer vacation from school so being mobile when I don't have to be is so difficult. But I still force myself to the gym, like i'm about to do lol

the increased hunger is definitely because of increased caloric burn from your workouts and your body telling you NEED MORE FUEL RAWR and if you don't have healthy and satisfying alternatives on hand it can be easy to give in to cravings or grab whatever is convenient - which is what we're hardwired to do. Why go through all the effort of hunting down the perfect apple tree and climbing it and getting it when you can get something else that's decent and edible and satisfying (which is more difficult with palatable foods like processed junk that we love so much!!!!) for half the effort, amiright?

you probably do need more carbs, so maybe try to increase your carbohydrate intake from vegetables or fruits or starches like potatoes, or plan your junk food into your calorie intake. There is a whole psychological thing called the Polar bear phenomenon (i think i remember that name correctly) which is essentially proof that by telling yourself to NOT think about something controversially causes you to think about that thing more. So don't kick yourself for having pizza and fried chicken and say "don't think about eating it!" because then you'll be putting off that craving for another 50 days and cave into it again and feel bad about yourself, yet again. Just forgive yourself and try to find better alternatives, or figure out a way to portion the food so you can essentially "have your cake and still eat it" - like freezing the pizza slices and heating them up individually? or making a healthier pizza alternative. Or just eating it, get it out of your system, and move on (which is what i need to do most of the time hahaha)

anyways, good luck, and just know you're not the only one!

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